courage2

If you’re not, let someone know.

I made a mistake yesterday thinking that someone on SR was wavering, when they weren’t. It made me think about saying we’re ok.

I’m rarely ok. I get along pretty functionally most of the time, and sometimes nowadays I even smile. Yes, really!

But I’m an alcoholic, and whether that’s a disease or a mental malady, there’s something wrong in my thinking – it’s not wrong as in a moral issue, but it has a moral dimension because use affects the morality of my behavior. And it’s a deadly problem. As alcoholics and addicts we walk a tightrope – sometimes with confidence, even grace, sometimes not so much. We can’t forget that however well we’re going along, the rope spans a great abyss with sharp rocks on the way down to a mist-engulfed but certain doom.

If you’re NOT ok, please talk about it. If you think you’re ok, but you’re not sure, ask for help. Ask here, ask among your face-to-face support if you have any. You can’t get any help by covering up your struggles and putting on a brave face.

The beauty of it is that help helps. Please let someone know if you need it.

PurpleKnight

Great post!!

Soberwolf

Good post courage

Fly N Buy

Yes, deux - something wrong with our thinking. Mine is thinking too much sometimes!
The obsession of the mind leading to.......

Asking for help for me is really, really tough. It becomes problematic for me because I am never sure if I need help or the bombastic blowhard in me is yelling I got this!

I have started to learn however, that through weakness we gain strength. The operative word being WE. I had a nice break through the other day you and others took of their time to respond. I claimed it was "venting'. In hindsight, it was asking for help which I received from great folks on SR.

great post milady......

maybe black walnut today!

Thepatman

Great reminder. Now that you mention it I had a crappy day.

SparkyMcSparky

And courage2, for some people, they may have difficulty asking for help, but the fact someone offers may allow them to ask.

Plus, showing you care about others, and checking in just to make sure they are OK is important. It is never, ever, ever bad to let other people know you care about them and are concerned for them.

Always better to err on the side of caution and show people just how wonderful you are. And courage2, you are wonderful.

Dee74

Thanks Courage...and yes I'm ok

D

nigey1

Im actually pretty good at the moment courage. Im going out for a walk on a world class beach that I will probably have to myself, there were dolphins there the other day just me and them.

Hope you are OK too.

Thanks for asking.

Altoids

Thanks for asking, Courage. I'm doing well today. And I love your posts. Asking for help isn't easy, but necessary.

huntingtontx

Great post Courage. I am doing well, and thanks for asking. I totally agree. Thank you for posting.

courage2

Thepatman, what was crappy? And what will make you feel better today? I'd like to take an evening walk in your fair city.

Nigey, tonight just happens to be dolphin night on the 24 Hour Recovery thread: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-14-a-6.html. There's not enough good to say about dolphins! I won't even try to express their complete wonderful-ness -- I'll just try to let them speak for themselves.

Huntingtontx, I believe you have 14 months today! So glad you're doing well!

Flynbuy, black walnut sounds tasty!

Altoids, Dee, Sparky, PK, & soberwolf -- you're very welcome. It's somehow a great comfort to me to think of everyone in their places near and far, doing ok in recovery.

How's everybody else?

Anna

It's a good reminder for all of us, Courage.

SR is a great place for finding help.

Kaneda8888

Thanks Courage. I needed to hear that. Even though I did celebrate a birthday yesterday, I have been feeling a little deflated now and then for the past week.

courage2

I know how it can be, Kaneda -- I loved your post last night on the 24 Hour thread -- I hate those low spells when you start to question everything, but it's so good when you get beyond one and you know that you stayed sober through it. Stay steady on the beam!

alphaomega

Great post Courage ! And glad to have you in my corner.

sober808

Tku courage2...many times those three words can make all the difference.

Lovenjoy

i'm ok courage, thanks for asking! this is a great thread. i have a very hard time asking for help. i am learning. asking for help doesn't mean i'm weak. it means i'm taking care of myself. i wasn't ok for a while there a couple of weeks ago and i asked for help. here and face to face.

i almost waited to long to ask... it could have been disastrous. you're right. if we are not ok we need to let someone know. the genuine caring and heartfelt support i have received has gotten me back on track and taught me much. tell, ask, reach out - people are there!

and it has taught me that being there for others is more important even than i had already thought. it's a two way street. being a person who gets help when needed helps me understand people in need.

are you ok courage?

courage2

Thanks for asking, Lovenjoy! Super tired, is all. I think more clearly these days but I'm still really limited in what I can take on. I'm glad you got some support during your rough patch.

I've found it gets easier to ask for help with practice. Less scary. I practice with dumb stuff, like in the hardware store. It's amazing to me that some people have always known to ask for help in the hardware store. Me, I'd just wander around pretending I knew where I was going until I got tired, angry, and frustrated -- then I'd leave without what I came for & get drunk.

Notimetoloose

Doing Ok here....having a go....It is a great question and something that a lot of us need to learn to give ourselves the tools to say 'NO, I am not okay'.... a lot strong people with inner strenght seem to fail seeking help when they need it, simple because they view themselves as strong....

Jupiters

Thx courage2 great post!
So far today, I'm ok. However, I have a meeting with my employer today to discuss a raise I have been waiting for. I was to get it when my year was up (June) but due to my...hrmmm "incident" let's call it in May - that didn't happen. (Understandable) ...I went back and said "ok, I will give you until end of August b/c then it will have been 3 months, like a whole new probationary period...to prove I am fine"...today is the day we talk. I'm getting a vibe they want more time which is going to upset me. I feel I have proven myself now (4mths) and have also been given added responsibilities that weren't mine previously. I don't know how I am going to handle the news if they come back with a "no, not yet"

Being an adult is the pits some days eh! LOL
wish me luck! fingers crossed.