Angelbc211

Hello, I have been addicted to pain killers for over five years now. It started with vics then percs. It didn't take long to lose almost everything I had. I actually had to move into my in-laws house with my one year old son because we couldn't afford to keep a roof over our heads.we saved up money and are back on our own but it's getting bad again. My husband introduced me to this wicked drug. Now he takes them because he's got actual pain. But he does not take them by mouth or how he should. He doesn't think it matters what way to take it. Since he got his script he was not okay with me doing them. I have tried so many times to quit and I am starting to hate the love of my life cause he gets them and I don't. I can't go into rehab because I'm the only one to take care of my kids. I do want to go to outpatient though. I'm just so scared to do this alone because all my friends do pills so I'm afraid I'm going to be alone by the end of it. I'm scared. I just want to be happy and I'm afraid I won't be happy again without pills.

FeenixxRising

Welcome Angel, my issues was alcohol; although, I did the occasional opiate pill, but not to the point of physical addiction, so I'm not sure what advice I can give you. My first suggestion would be rehab, but that doesn't sound possible. Have you considered NA meetings? And a visit to your doctor?

I know there are people here who have overcome pill addiction, and I'm sure they will come along and offer suggestions. If they don't, there is a sub-forum here for "Substance Abuse". You may want to also ask your question there if you don't receive many replies here. Whatever you do, I suggest you keep reading and posting here. You will find help and encouragement here.

Dee74

Hi angel - you're definitely not alone here. There's tons of support

I identify as an alcoholic but I lost all my friends too - the good news is I fiound a lot of great new ones, and some old friends I'd drifted away from.

I know it's scary but noone would stay in recovery if they thought they were losing out on the deal - try and have a little faith that it'll all be ok

do you know how to get into outpatient rehab where you are?

D

Mags1

Hi a Angel, welcome to our family.

I'm not familiar with pills mine was alcohol too, but lots here with similar problems.

I know what you mean by just wanting to be happy again. I necked the booze every night just to feel terrible the next morning only to start feeling better through the day ready for my next episode. I couldn't get out of the terrible cycle I was in.

Angelbc211

Dee. I only had one friend really before I started doing them. And the friend I have now only talks to me because of them. I know of a couple of places but it's a two or three week wait before you can start treatment. I don't want to wait I want to start asap.
Mags my sister twin actually is in denial that she has a drinking problem she had actually called me and told me if she don't drink she feels sick. She thinks that I have a problem and she doesn't because her addiction is alcohol. Thank you both. I actually had a big smile on my face when it said I had replies. I don't really have support in my life right now. Everyone thinks I can stop over night. So it really means allot to me to know people understand and care and you don't even know me that's what makes it mean so much more.

Angelbc211

Sorry Feenixx didn't see your post right away. I have thought about meetings but the thought of doing it alone puts me in panic mode. I don't have anyone to go with me. I know I should be doing it alone cause is my battle just wish even my husband would help me. No I have not talked to my Dr about it yet. I might just make an appt and see what happens

Mags1

Hi Angel you can do, really. It's not easy, no, but it does get easier.

Coming here is your first tentative step. Slowly, and baby steps we can help you through this.

Keep strong, you're among friends here.

FeenixxRising

I wouldn't worry about going to meetings alone; I'm sure people will be welcoming at the meetings. I went to my first AA meeting alone and I had no problems at all.

Also, the Southeastern Arizona NA group has a help line Local Area Help Line: 520-881-8381. You could call them and see if it would be possible to arrange a ride with an existing member to a meeting. That might make the first meeting a little easier.

It appears they have quite a few meetings in the Tucson area: meeting list

Angelbc211

Awwww thank you do much Mags. You actually brought a tear to my eyes and a smile on my face. Thank you so much.

Angelbc211

Thank you Feenixx I'll save that number and call them in the morning.

Mags1

I've found so much help on this site, Angel, I'm sure you will too. The people are brilliant, I 'speak' to them more than I would ever say to anyone I know.

You can get independent and caring views and experiences without being judged.

There are a lot of people with our addictions ready to help.x

Mountainmanbob

don't let the devil fool you
in time you will be so much happier without the pills
I was eating those things morning noon and night
washed down with many a beer

now that I'm sober
I'm finally free -- the war is over

this would also be my wish for you

MM

Angelbc211

Thank you MM. can I ask how long it took until you started actually feeling normal again. Like waking up in the morning knowing you were going to be okay and happy again.

Angelbc211

Mags I think this site is going to really help me out allot. Now I know that I do have support out there and it means allot to me. I can't say thank you enough to everyone.

Soberwolf

Hi angel nice to meet you

Angelbc211

Does anyone have advice on what to do about my husband? He snorts the pills and does about double what he's prescribed.he spends about $2000 a month on it and justified it to be okay because he gets a prescription. He said he knows he has a problem but will take them the rest of his life. He has scoliosis and two metal rods in his back all the way and has some torn muscle in his knee. Surgery is not an option bc he can't take off with that long. It's hard for me to try and get sober when he goes to the bathroom then comes out all happy and ready to play with the kids. I want the man I married back and he doesn't think he's changed. I'm lost on what to do or say anymore.

Angelbc211

Thank you wolf. I love that quote

Mountainmanbob

I have sobered up a few different times
It seems to change each time

I attend AA where many addicts also end up
Have seen many over the years get their 30 day tokens
90 % at that time feel happy and blessed

That is a short time to wait
For all the good that is coming

MM