rlxsn

If you took the time to read this, thank you. I'd like to find a friend or friends to talk with as I have nobody in my 'real life' that I can turn to. To summarize my situation, I stopped drinking just over a year ago and while I am doing very well, my wife is not. We always had wine together. A bottle, two or three between the two of us was the norm. Since I stopped, she has a bottle to two a night, 4 nights a week. Like I said, hoping to find a friend or friends to talk to about this as I am sad, frustrated and generally unhappy with this and all that comes with it. I love her and am not contemplating leaving, just need to talk. Feel free to send me a PM.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Take care

Trusthisactions

Congratulations on getting sober! I wish my boyfriend could do it. He just pretended to be sober for a month.

Have you tried talking to your wife about her drinking? It must be difficult to watch her destroy herself yet also refrain from joining her as you used to do. Maybe show her how you quit and how much better you feel and hopefully she can accept your positive influence.

rlxsn

Thank you! Sorry your bf isn't having the success he wants.

I haven't talked to her directly about it because any time Iv'e tried, it goes south.

hopeful4

Hello and welcome. It's a slippery slope when you realize all it means to be sober and your partner does not. Congratulations on pulling yourself out!

I would say that you need to start by having a conversation about it. One that focuses on your concern for her future and health. Keep it kind. Most people respond much more favorable in that type of situation.

Keep coming back to SR. You will find great support and friendship here. Ultimately, keep working on you and your own sobriety!

dandylion

risxn......above all, do not let this deep six your own sobriety!

Sooner or later, you will have to let her know how you are feeling. How it is affecting you and your own sobriety. It can't be kept a secret forever.......
I would be careful to use "I" sentences.....about your own feelings and fears but not attacking her at all.
Undoubtedly, she will be defensive....probably angry and possibly attacking you back. Don't be surprised if this happens. The goal is to share your feelings.
She will take whatever reaction she chooses...you have no control over that part.

I don't know where you live...but alanon would be really supportive to you, right now.

I see that you joined SR about 5 months ago.....so, I assume that you have done ots of reading here....?

dandylion

rlxsn

Thanks guys! I appreciate you all taking the time to write There is a lot to the story as you can imagine.. if anyone would be interested in chatting over email, please let me know?

Rev 3:16

Very similar to my story. Since I'm so new, can't PM you. BUT can say that my session with wife will be next Friday when she comes home from two weeks away. Looking for approaches, information, insights that will be helpful. Thanks