MnEman

Need to come clean about some recent experimentation, because I know that secrets can be our undoing. Up until 3 weeks ago I had just over 5 months. Was feeling pretty good, antidepressant was kicking in, when I decided it might be a good time to try some controlled drinking, see if it was still fun. Amazing how quick you fall back into your old habits. Lying, drinking during the week, waking up feeling awful, then by evening thinking about a little something to dull the ache. Today I am renewing my commitment to contented sobriety. I hope I can pick where I left off, but may be checking out AA this time, don't know how many more slips I have left. Thanks for listening.
Eric

Stoogy

Hi Eric, I feel for you buddy, I done exactly the same thing very recently after 9 months sober, thought I could handle it better than before but within a week I was back to my old daily habits, but sometimes we need to see for ourselves why we must stop for good and we can listen to others tell us till the end of time but we have to fail in order to succeed sometimes.
You have proved you don't need too drink it's just a case of keeping that AV under control.

dwtbd

I had to realize that I drank because I liked being drunk. Being drunk and liking it is obviously detrimental to living a healthy life. Since drinking is what lead me to being drunk, I decided the best way to stay away from being drunk was to quit drinking. Trying to drink even if I was trying to not get drunk was entirely counterproductive, and not on the most obvious level. A few made me want more, there were times when I would could stop at a few, but I didn't like it, and after a few it was Always easier to shrug and adopt the wtf attitude, and usually make some mental promise like , this will be the last blow out, or these blow outs really have to stop soon. For me the only way to not be a drunk, was to become a non drinker. Not a bad trade all things considered, because I really don't want to be a drunk, so being a non drinker is not so bad in comparison , just took me awhile to figure it out and be comfortable with it. It's like sober zen. Anyway sorry for rambling, wish you well , you can do this, you got it!

PurpleKnight

Hey Eric, go at it again, you can do this!!

Anna

I think it's true that it's harder to deal with each slip as they seem to get worse and harder to come back from. I hope you do whatever you need to do to get and stay sober.

SoberComposer

Some great posts!!