The He's-Gone-Crazy-Because-He-Misses-the-Children Theory
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,038
The He's-Gone-Crazy-Because-He-Misses-the-Children Theory
That is how most people are interpreting xah's apparent mental decline/depression/strangeness.
The house is falling apart because he misses the children. He looks awful because he misses the children. He is abusive towards me because he misses the children. The police sent him to the hospital for a mental health evaluation because he misses the children. He can't stop drinking because he misses the children.
Which leaves to the most obvious conclusion: it is all my fault.
People believe the most ridiculous lies.
I'll tell you what, Xah. Go get into recovery. Quit drinking, hiding money, scaring and threatening me, abusing the children, destroying the house, and being dellusional and I'll move back 'home'.
Except it's too late and you know it.
My lawyer wants me to write a nice letter to xah this morning to try to convince him to clean up his act so that he can see the children. Sick of pointless letters. Don't people know there are no words that will convince xah of anything, unless it comes from the law? And even so he evades the law?
Wake up world and stop thinking that I have the power to change anything!
The house is falling apart because he misses the children. He looks awful because he misses the children. He is abusive towards me because he misses the children. The police sent him to the hospital for a mental health evaluation because he misses the children. He can't stop drinking because he misses the children.
Which leaves to the most obvious conclusion: it is all my fault.
People believe the most ridiculous lies.
I'll tell you what, Xah. Go get into recovery. Quit drinking, hiding money, scaring and threatening me, abusing the children, destroying the house, and being dellusional and I'll move back 'home'.
Except it's too late and you know it.
My lawyer wants me to write a nice letter to xah this morning to try to convince him to clean up his act so that he can see the children. Sick of pointless letters. Don't people know there are no words that will convince xah of anything, unless it comes from the law? And even so he evades the law?
Wake up world and stop thinking that I have the power to change anything!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,443
Don't worry about what other people think.
I've never heard of a lawyer requesting that. They aren't counselors. Mine worked totally opposite of that and said write out a list of your demands (which was backed up by my justifications) and she sent that over to his lawyer. As a matter of fact the more he declined the better off I was. The ship where we could work things out with reasonable requests had long since sailed or I wouldn't have been in divorce court. I should have had more demands.
I've never heard of a lawyer requesting that. They aren't counselors. Mine worked totally opposite of that and said write out a list of your demands (which was backed up by my justifications) and she sent that over to his lawyer. As a matter of fact the more he declined the better off I was. The ship where we could work things out with reasonable requests had long since sailed or I wouldn't have been in divorce court. I should have had more demands.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
It should be a qualifier for EVERY SINGLE JUDGE AND ATTORNEY, IN EVERY SINGLE COUNTRY, to have to go through an extended amount of substance abuse/alcoholism training, especially in dealing with how it affects children. I also think it's such BS that even after one is separated you are still expected to coddle him into doing the right thing b/c "He is Stressed and Misses the Children." Total crap.
My heart hurts for you today Pippi.
Hugs.
My heart hurts for you today Pippi.
Hugs.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 106
Sad reality is that most people do not fully believe that the loved ones of the alcoholic have no power to change them until they themselves have been exposed personally to it AND they actively seek to learn more about it.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
This, This, This. However, Pippi is no longer a loved one, she should not be expected to coddle this man into doing the right thing. It is just nuts!
Originally Posted by HikerLady 
Sad reality is that most people do not fully believe that the loved ones of the alcoholic have no power to change them until they themselves have been exposed personally to it AND they actively seek to learn more about it.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
Your attorney wants you to write because it documents the problem for your use in court and it demonstrates that you are attempting to resolve issues while keeping your children safe.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: atlanta, ga
Posts: 3,581
Who are "most people"? Who is it that is telling you that this is what everyone believes?
Who cares.
You think you are going to have relationships with mutual friends and family after all this is done with? F**k em. They don't know jack squat about living with an addict. Puh-lease.
Your lawyer doesn't give a crap about your AH or whether he gets in recovery or cleans up his act. Your lawyer is simply trying to help your case.
Who cares.
You think you are going to have relationships with mutual friends and family after all this is done with? F**k em. They don't know jack squat about living with an addict. Puh-lease.
Your lawyer doesn't give a crap about your AH or whether he gets in recovery or cleans up his act. Your lawyer is simply trying to help your case.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 1,737
Originally Posted by PippiLngstockng
That is how most people are interpreting xah's apparent mental decline/depression/strangeness.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 494
Who are "most people"? Who is it that is telling you that this is what everyone believes?
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
