Yenic

Good day everyone. I am not sure if this is the right place but any help I can get from you to point me in the right direction is appreciated. I am trying to help a friend. Som lives in my house and I am there probably only 60 to 90 days per year due to my work. Our friendship goes back 25 years. Som has been drinking since I know him but was contained to 3 or 4 nights a week and some binge clusters few time a year. He was never what you would call a bad drunk. Always having fun, teasing and laughing. No crying or fighting. For the past 8 years his frequency increased to drinking everyday. He hangs around with some professional retirees that father at the local joint everyday. They start call calling him at about 6:00 PM to join them. He drops everything and goes. By the time he gets back at around 01:00 AM he is very inebriated. I ignore all of this but I know his health is deteriorating. He says he does not have an alcohol problem. He does and it's taking all of his money as well. I would like to help him but I feel I might not be the best person because I am not there enough. I am a Canadian living in Thailand and Som is a Thai. All our friends in common have spoken to him the Thai way many times about this. Now his tenors are on the increase and I worry about irreparable damages. Som is 45 years old and lives off a fund. I need to find a solid approach to convince that there is more to life. He exercises everyday on his mountain bike. He rides approximately 35 kms everyday but stop at the watering joint after. I will accept any comments or advices you are willing to share. Best regards, Yenic.

Resolv

Hello Yenic, You're a good friend. I'm no expert, but maybe Som has to want to quit. Hopefully, someone here on SR with real expertise will chime in one way or the other. In the meantime, perhaps there are other resources such as a Dr. or a website that can clarify this. Good luck. Resolv

HeartsAfire

Hi Yenic

There is a Friends and Family section of this website that may be able to offer you support and resources. You also might want to look at Al-Anon. Other than that the choice to stop is ultimately in Som's hands. There is a TON of help & resources available to those who truly seek it.

Best of luck.

Yenic

Thank you for your comments. Yes I think a medical professional would be a good starting point. I have an excellent GP who has flaws like everybody else in this world. You made me think about contacting him on this. I need help from someone that is culturally sensitive and he is a Thai who appears to me to be very grounded. The Thai culture is prone to drinking to begin with. When I saw Som shaking yesterday, I noticed it on the plane because our proximity, it was a real shock. I realized the seriousness of it all and felt it was time I try to do something. I respect his right to live his life the way he wishes to but I can't ignore the fact that he might be ruining his old age as well and get very sick in the future. He is a good person and everybody loves him. My GP will be getting a visit as soon as I return to Thailand next month. Best regards. Yenic

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Yenic!!

Looking in on someone else's alcoholism can be very difficult, almost frustrating at times, because we can see it, but the person themselves can't, and that's the problem, they need to see what is happening and want to change themselves to produce longterm results!!

As mentioned we have a friends and family section which has a lot of great advice and support, and that's important for you looking in on this!!

It's great to have you here!!