I need sobriety
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 316
I need sobriety
Hello. I have been lurking in these forums for a few months now.
My history is that I have been drinking heavily since I was about 17 years old. I am 27 now I now have a 3 year old daughter. I know I have a drinking problem. I do not know how to have just a few drinks. I have to drink until I am trashed.
I have tried to be sober multiple times. I've not drank for about 2 months at my max and 2 days at my least. I was two weeks sober until I heard about robin.Williams. I am heartbroken and feel as though my childhood friend has died . My husband is a mostly daily drinker but not an alcoholic like I feel I am.
I.want to stop. I.know I am slowly killing myself but do not know how to stop. I am angry at myself for not just being able to stop through sheer will power. My sisteralso abuses alcohol but refuses to accept it. I in general feel overwhelmed and would typically works never pay but not surprisingly a few drinks had lubricated my inhibitions aka social anxiety.
I'm not even sure what I am trying to accomplish by this post...maybe asking for help...maybe just sharing my story... I just feel so broken and useless.
My history is that I have been drinking heavily since I was about 17 years old. I am 27 now I now have a 3 year old daughter. I know I have a drinking problem. I do not know how to have just a few drinks. I have to drink until I am trashed.
I have tried to be sober multiple times. I've not drank for about 2 months at my max and 2 days at my least. I was two weeks sober until I heard about robin.Williams. I am heartbroken and feel as though my childhood friend has died . My husband is a mostly daily drinker but not an alcoholic like I feel I am.
I.want to stop. I.know I am slowly killing myself but do not know how to stop. I am angry at myself for not just being able to stop through sheer will power. My sisteralso abuses alcohol but refuses to accept it. I in general feel overwhelmed and would typically works never pay but not surprisingly a few drinks had lubricated my inhibitions aka social anxiety.
I'm not even sure what I am trying to accomplish by this post...maybe asking for help...maybe just sharing my story... I just feel so broken and useless.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Hi,
Welcome! You can stop drinking if you make the decision to live a sober life. I think it's important to know that stopping drinking is the beginning of recovery, but there is a lot more work to do at that point.
Welcome! You can stop drinking if you make the decision to live a sober life. I think it's important to know that stopping drinking is the beginning of recovery, but there is a lot more work to do at that point.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Hello and welcome. Glad you decided to post.
You just made a big step by admitting you have a problem.
I drank for twenty thee years alcoholically. I've been sober three years seven months, so it can be done.
It takes willingness and an open mind to outside help. Have you thought of AA, or another program of recovery? I know that must be hard with a toddler and a husband who drinks.
It took many attempts for me to finally quit. I went to AA and met people just like me in their drinking, but so different in lifestyles.
I drank again, but it was never the same. I felt guilty. Guilty for being a drunk while others stuck with it and were recovering.
Things got worse. Alcoholism has a progressive component, so I hope you can quit before you reach the lows I did.
You'll find a lot of support here. This is my life line.
I wish you the best. Stopping drinking can be done if you're ready to go to any lengths to get sober.
You just made a big step by admitting you have a problem.
I drank for twenty thee years alcoholically. I've been sober three years seven months, so it can be done.
It takes willingness and an open mind to outside help. Have you thought of AA, or another program of recovery? I know that must be hard with a toddler and a husband who drinks.
It took many attempts for me to finally quit. I went to AA and met people just like me in their drinking, but so different in lifestyles.
I drank again, but it was never the same. I felt guilty. Guilty for being a drunk while others stuck with it and were recovering.
Things got worse. Alcoholism has a progressive component, so I hope you can quit before you reach the lows I did.
You'll find a lot of support here. This is my life line.
I wish you the best. Stopping drinking can be done if you're ready to go to any lengths to get sober.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi and welcome to what can become a life where your comfortable in your own skin. Good info above when it’s followed, for 2 long years I had the AH BUTs so it didn’t work for me. I needed to be honest with myself about my drinking and accept the fact that I cannot drink in safety.
Here and at meetings are people who understand you/us because we all had our first days.
The way it’s worked for eternity in all programs is we don’t pick up the first drink. I needed back then to go to a lot of meetings even though I thought I had important things to do.
Sobriety and life are the most important things we have which was so sadly taken away from RW yesterday. Sadly too many go that way unnecessarily when we go about it our way.
BE WELL
Here and at meetings are people who understand you/us because we all had our first days.
The way it’s worked for eternity in all programs is we don’t pick up the first drink. I needed back then to go to a lot of meetings even though I thought I had important things to do.
Sobriety and life are the most important things we have which was so sadly taken away from RW yesterday. Sadly too many go that way unnecessarily when we go about it our way.
BE WELL
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 316
Thank you for your heartfelt replies. I need to get myself together, quit drinking so I can become comfortable in my own body, set an example for my LO and maybe show my sister it is possible. So this is day 1 for me. Did anyone else feel scared to go to an AA meeting? I live in a small army community in Asia and I guess I just don't want to feel like I am not actually in an anonymous group.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,775
Welcome! 
I hope the support here can help you stop drinking for good.
I quit well over four years ago and it feels great! I don't live in fear anymore. I wake up feeling good.
AA meetings are supposed to be anonymous. You can call the AA number for your town/area, and tell them your concerns about anonymity.
I hope the support here can help you stop drinking for good.I quit well over four years ago and it feels great!
I don't live in fear anymore. I wake up feeling good.AA meetings are supposed to be anonymous. You can call the AA number for your town/area, and tell them your concerns about anonymity.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 64
Hi, thanks for your post!
I also live in Asia and attend Skype meetings multiple times per week. If you are concerned about anonymity or have difficulty traveling to meetings, Skype could be an option.
If you are interested, here is a link to a meeting list: http://www.aainkorea.org/July%202013...ING%20LIST.pdf
feel free to PM for more details/questions
I also live in Asia and attend Skype meetings multiple times per week. If you are concerned about anonymity or have difficulty traveling to meetings, Skype could be an option.
If you are interested, here is a link to a meeting list: http://www.aainkorea.org/July%202013...ING%20LIST.pdf
feel free to PM for more details/questions
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Thank you on a level so high you remind me of me the same desperation the heartbreak you are so brave it is possible I am and thousands others are proof we are all different but here for the same thing there will be better days ahead stay strong and if you ever want to chat or anything hit me up
Well done and speak soon
Well done and speak soon
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: South louisiana
Posts: 13
Kamm, what you are experiencing is confusing and scary, but not impossible. You have made a big step...admitting to someone that you have trouble with alcohol. I too live in a small community, and I have a "public" job. I find that this forum and other Webb resources are what I feel comfortable with.
I have been drinking since I was 10...I went to treatment at 24. I was only sober for a year or so, because in my culture drinking is an acceptable past time on a daily basis. My sisters and parents drink excessively. I felt that I had no escape...until this forum.
Support from others who understand is the key. Kamm, I'm 48 and I'm finally ready to really give it up! You can do it!
Thanks for reaching out. Keep me posted on your progress.
I have been drinking since I was 10...I went to treatment at 24. I was only sober for a year or so, because in my culture drinking is an acceptable past time on a daily basis. My sisters and parents drink excessively. I felt that I had no escape...until this forum.
Support from others who understand is the key. Kamm, I'm 48 and I'm finally ready to really give it up! You can do it!
Thanks for reaching out. Keep me posted on your progress.
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