JusticeNyne

I haven't had a drink in almost three years. However I've been smoking pot since February this year and I hate it. I've been trying to quit for the last five months, however I have the same mental obsession to smoke everyday as I used to have with booze. And now I'm finding that when I'm not stoned, I start to think about drinking.

I think the root of my problem is spiritual. So I've been trying to find a sponsor who can take me through the steps again so I can reconnect with God. Before I picked up pot, I had a bunch of fears and resentments that I had been keeping to myself. I had been "talking" about doing a 4th step, but of course not following up with action. This was six months before I started smoking pot.

None of those fears or resentments have gone anywhere and I'm wondering if I focus on them (in steps 4-9) if the obsession to smoke pot would be removed as well as the recent thoughts about drinking.

The issue I'm running into is that I can't find a sponsor who will take me through the steps unless I quit smoking pot. I have a sponsor who tells me when I have 20 or so days without pot, we can start going through the steps. I don't know how to quit smoking pot anymore than I knew how to quit drinking on my own.

I'm a little bit peeved, because from reading the book I'm convinced that only God can remove my obsession to smoke pot just like God removed my obsession to drink. I'm also upset because I'm scared that I have to drink again before anyone will take me through the steps, since everyone I've talked to keeps telling me they won't work with me until I quit smoking pot.


To me it seems that the pot smoking is just another manifestation of the spiritual malady. I don't understand why I can't find a sponsor who will help me address this before I drink.

NoJimmy

I'm not sure how much good rushing through steps 4-9 will do you if your head is clouded with pot. I suspect that is what concerns your sponsor. However, my first priority would be to maintain sobriety from alcohol. Trading pot for alcohol is going backward (IMO) if that's what it means to quit pot right now.
What changed in Feb that led you to start smoking pot?

ScottFromWI

Have you considered trying NA in addition to AA?

Physically stopping a substance may be partially spiritual, but the physical act is something you need to perform yourself. No matter what you've read in a book you own partial responsibility in that process. If you can't physically stop you might need to consider detox.

JusticeNyne

No Jimmy the straw that broke the camel's back was using a girl in AA to get laid and not 10th stepping. It was wrong and I didn't do anything about it.

There was another 20-30 other self-centered acts as well. There were also some huge fears around money and career. Things that I should have been 10th stepping about.

Scott yeah I've gone to NA, but it's hard to relate to the unmanageability. Plus I know alcohol equals death for me, which is hard to say about pot. The steps are identical, so if it's about connecting to God, I wouldn't think NA versus AA would matter.

I'll check into seeing if detox admits people who smoke pot in Colorado.

ScottFromWI

Addiction is addiction no matter what, the legality of the substance is irrelevant.

There is a big difference between smoking pot and not being able to stop smoking pot - you need to decide which category you fall under.

doggonecarl

You said in your initial post on this thread, "I don't know how to quit smoking pot anymore than I knew how to quit drinking on my own."

Don't know how to quit...believe that only God can remove your obsession to smoke pot. That sounds like unmanageable to me. What's your definition?

Regardless, if you are unwilling to stop smoking before you work with your sponsor, I hope you find a recovery method that works. All of them, I think, are going to force change, make you uncomfortable, and have expectations that you are clean while you go through it.

Dee74

Hi and welcome JusticeNyne

Although I started on pot, I too found that pot was as bad for me as drink. I was the problem not the drugs.

If you want a 12 step solution have you considered NA? or Marijuana Anonymous?

D

Anna

You can also address the spiritual aspect of recovery on your own, at least until you find a sponsor. There are so many really great books on spirituality. "The Seat of the Soul" by Gary Zukav was the book that enabled me to reconnect spiritually and stop drinking.

Dee74

I merged two threads.

What do you mean about not relating to the unmanageability?

D

sugarbear1

We do need to try to stop clouding our minds before we can work the steps and not smoking pot is possible. We have to want to try and to stop more than we want to smoke it.

Think of it as a form of detoxing our bodies to allow a clear channel for our higher power.

Begin by asking your HP for the strength not to smoke today. Go for those 20 days and work those steps with that guy. You CAN do this!!!

SoberComposer

I used to smoke, a while back, when I could get it but was very low tolerance. As long as it won't risk your alcohol sobriety I would make that leap and quit. It's like alcohol though, scary to live without that life-crutch, but if you make that decision to quit it may not be as rough as you suspect. The tough part may be making that commited decision. Try to taper off and give yourself a date. That may get you mentally prepared in terms of that omnious alcoholic voice. Not sure if that helped at all but wanted to chime-in. Best of luck!!