HHTexas

Pet. Peeve. No pun intended

Our dog is like 100 years old. Doesn't bark. He occasionally pees in the house (annoying but not earth shattering) and he likes to eat Cheerios and other food bits DS drops under his high chair. AH then screams at him, usually something to the tune if "get the duck away."

I remember a coworker told me her ex A use to yell at their dog. And I was appalled.

suki44883

That makes me sad.

iamthird

When I filed for a restraining order against separated AH I had to fill out a form and it asked many questions including how he treated the household animals!

honeypig

While my RAH was still drinking, he was impatient with and intolerant of our dogs. If he went for a walk w/us, he'd be absolutely fixated on controlling what they did every second--"Don't let her sniff that, she'll eat it!" "He's pulling on the leash, don't let him do that!" He would yank on their leashes to get their attention if we were turning onto another road, and I can't even count how many times I said "all you have to do is say their names, they'll turn to look and they'll see where you're going and follow." He also used to complain if I paid what he thought was too much attention to them--he expected to be the center of everyone's world, apparently. (His complaints never stopped me from doing anything for or with them; I love dogs and particularly my dogs.)

Really, we were just taking a relaxed early AM ramble--no need for this military level of discipline!

I posted this a few months ago on a similar topic. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-insight.html He treats the dogs very differently now than he did before, and I think his earlier behaviors were absolutely related to the disease of alcoholism and the self-centered and controlling way active A's are.

Butterfly

Mine was the same he would shout at her for every little thing. She would have wet very night when he was here she was so scared of him!! Since he left she has been dry most mornings and is a more happier dog!

He would want to control everything, money, kids, he would shout and yell at the slightest thing especially if the kids didn't do their chores. The home was very tense!!!!

dandylion

I agree...HHTexas. I don't think anyone should be allowed to mistreat animals or children.
Same goes for anyone who is to weak or vulnerable to protect themselves.

dandylion

Thumper

I've said on here before that I left for what alcoholism was doing to me, not him. My truth is that I was the one yelling at the kids and the dog. I was becoming the controlling crazy person. I was exhausted and hanging on by a very very thin rope. I was at my bottom. I was not able to be the person I wanted to be w/in that system. I had to leave. I don't know how anyone stays and not go crazy but we are each different as is our circumstances. I can not control other people but I do have self-determination and responsibility for who I am as an individual. I also have an obligation to my children to do the best I can. We all agree that an alcoholic parent is a negative but a codependent parent is no picnic. This is where the serenity prayer fits nicely.

hopeful4

I think that says a lot about his character. Screaming at a poor old dog....wow....

aasharon90

That too makes me sad and i'll add mad too.

When under the influence, any little thing
can trigger emotions and the innocent ones
are to blame. The little ones, children, puppies,
the older ones, senior citizens, elderly, and
all the ones in between who are incapable
of defending themselves.

Im an alcohol in recovery for the past 23 yrs.
and im no exception. Little things, big things
did trigger many emotions and some still do
today, but not in violence or hurtful ways.

Many folks including myself are/were sick
ourselves and we lash out to loved ones,
people, things that we care about and because
of our illness/addiction we showed no remorse
or care for the actions that followed us.

It took a program of recovery, maybe counciling
to teach us healthier ways to act and react to
all those little to all those big things in life that
bug us.

When someone like myself who was physically,
emotionally and verbally abused by the hand of
one sick parent, hearing about others who are
unable to defend themselves makes me feel
sick inside.Because I know hurt.

I still stand by that NO person, child, pet
should be hurt. Not by hand, mouth or object.

Just my thoughts to share how I feel.