Chilledice

I am so lost for words im not sure what to say really? I have been on this site for over one year struggling with the bottle, I am SO ashamed and EMBARRASSED to keep saying its day 1 one for me.


Some of you may know I had around 30 days sober ( about 2 months ago ) and I was sooooo stupid I went back to the bottle and now I just feel like I cant climb out of it. Feel like I have lost my strength !


SO sorry I really am, just sometimes the pain inside gets TOO bad and I MUST have relief!

Anyways I don't want you guys to think I am mocking you by my slips I AM trying and I am sorry!!!


Goona head off to bed now as ive had a few, sleep well folks wish you all the best!

trachemys

Glad you came back. Put the bottle away and sober up. We got your back.

mesmith2

It's taken me a year of fits and starts to get where I am... Day seven. Please don't beat yourself up. Just don't drink for 24 hours. We can do it together.

Nuudawn

Hey Chill. I'm so very happy to see your return! Correct me if I'm wrong, but were you not only going for 30 days at that time? Or did it just become that in the end? I believe my feet were barely back in this wagon then..so I think I only caught some of your last posts.

Nevertheless...glad you're back.

Anna

Glad you're back!

There are other ways to deal with the pain inside. Hopefully you can find some things that work for you.

Tempe

Chilledice - no reason at all in this world for you to beg to be back with a bunch of people just like you seeking sobriety. So many of us are swept up in that sober/relapsing cycle. Of course we want to be sober, but for whatever situation we're in, we're stuck between those two existences. God bless you. No judgment here. It will bet better.

Chilledice

I was planning on going sober for life but it all became too damn hard for me but I though stuff it might aswell do 30 days and THEN have a beer, and now im back into alcoholic hell, I don't know any other way to put it!


Getting LOADS of oranges down me right now via my blender

Serenidad

Please don't give up on yourself. You are important to this world & people love you! You can do this! Let us help. Xo

Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery

Chilledice

Guys THANK YOU!!!! seriously mean that!!!

malcolmsloan

Get some rest, Chill. Then get up tomorrow and keep fighting. We've all been there.
Onward!

desypete

for me i simply have to go to aa and get my butt on a seat daily if i have to as there i get all the wisdom and help i could ever possibly want or need

its been 10 years sober for me and i have had good times and very painful times that i am still in pain with today but so long as i have the aa fellowship to lean on then i am ok
but i have to put the leg work in no one else will do it for me sadly so there is no easy way out
pain will come in life weather you in aa or not its how we cope and react to it that counts
if our first port of call is to drink then maybe we need to learn simply how not to run for a drink the moment life kicks us in the privates

it hurts when we get kicked there but we have to take the pain and not pick up that first drink i could only do this daily by getting to a meeting and being around other sober people who knew how i was feeling and would always pick me up with there love and kindness or sometimes a swift kick up the backside was needed but either way it was the only place for me to find peace at last

least

I'm glad you're back, trying again.

VikingGF

I've stopped and started so many times I can't count. It all starts with the first day.

Lisa.

Hevyn

Good to see you back Chilled - we all understand what you're going through.

No reason to be ashamed or embarrassed - you're among friends. Let's try this again.

Hawkeye13

Welcome back Chill

Dee74

Welcome back chilledice

what plans have you got in place to deal with that pain when it comes back again?

D

Windancer

I am glad you are back too!
Don't be ashamed. I have had so many day ones I cant even count them all, but I keep returning. And I will continue to, as I wont give up. I hope you don't give up either.
Have some water, rest up and post again tomorrow

chicory

Welcome back! and don't ever give up!

happyandfree

Glad you posted, chill. Have a good night's sleep and come back tomorrow. We will be here. You can do this.

ccam1973

Welcome back Chill. No shame or embarassment in this battle as long as you keep fighting. It's when you give up the fight for good that you are truly lost. It takes courage to pick up where you left off. 30 days sober is great. You had it in you before and have learned from your relapse.

I made the same mistake after 32 days sober in june. It only took one drink and I was worse off than before I stopped! Now I'm closing in on 23 days again. I have finally learned that I truly can never drink again. Thr drinking option is off of the table for me, period. I am thankful for this realization.

Good luck, you are never alone in this fight. You can do this and we are here for you. Be strong!

[[/U]