Elpasogal

Hi,

Just found this site and will spend some time reading posts of other parents of sons. My son is in jail as he was breaking in my house and stealing whatever he could sell. I put in security cameras and finally had enough evidence to have a search warrant issued and he was caught.

I did put up money for phone calls and money on his books but will not renew either of those items. He is still blaming me for his incarceration. I obviously have a lot to learn about how not to enable.

Does anyone have a recommendation on a great book to send him to read while in jail?

Anna

Hi,

I'm sorry for your situation with your son. I hope he seeks support for his addiction.

This is our reading list:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rituality.html

oceanlady1958

i am going through the exact same thing- my son blamed me or 8 years. they are responsible for their actions- not us. good book that i read - didn't send my son though was broken by william cope moyers(son of bill moyers ) very well written about his struggles with addiction. look it up online and see if you think he might like it. my son won't read anything like that because he doesn't feel he is an addict. but as a parent you may like the book as i did. if your son is young he may like tweak also written by a young addict. stay strong. this site is great and the people on here have alot of wisdom to share regarding enabling - i has given me strength and i hope you find the same.

jdooner

In the Realm of Hungry Ghost, by Gabor Mate would be good for both you and your son. I am sorry to hear of your troubles.

There is a friends and family section on this site and Al Anon is a great program to deal with relationships and speaks of loving detatchment. While its easy to blame the addict for his/her destructive behaviors, its also important to realize he did not become this way on his own.

doggonecarl

Does anyone have a recommendation on a great book to send him to read while in jail?

Get him a Bible. Your son has some soul searching to do.

Climber122

I would second the recommendation of seeking out your local Al-Anon meeting. All the good literature in the world won't help him unless he is ready to hear it. The fact that he blames you tells me he isn't ready, but regardless, one thing you'll learn in Al-Anon is that he isn't bad - he's sick - and you aren't to blame for his sickness. You'll learn to break free from his control over you. It may be the most loving thing you can do for him is to let the consequences of his addiction accumulate until he is ready for someone to help him. Sorry for your troubles - we all know it's really hard - Al Anon can offer you the support that makes it a little easier - God bless.