Hiding it...lol!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Illinois
Posts: 230
Hiding it...lol!
Day 12 and had a surprise visit from my son. I thought I was the best at hiding my drinking...nobody knew...ya right. We had a long, honest, and SOBER conversation. He pulls no punches with me. Told me everything, right down to the fact he could hear me set my beer down on the table when we were on the phone.
I am very thankful to be at day 12 right now...and through the laughter, tears, and hugs yesterday, VERY thankful that he still loves me and supports me even though I have put him through h*ll!
Before he left last night, he gave me a hug, (which he doesn't do) and told me he was proud of me.
We have a great relationship and I need to be the sober Mom I used to be.
Keep pushing forward people...it is so worth it!
I am very thankful to be at day 12 right now...and through the laughter, tears, and hugs yesterday, VERY thankful that he still loves me and supports me even though I have put him through h*ll!
Before he left last night, he gave me a hug, (which he doesn't do) and told me he was proud of me.
We have a great relationship and I need to be the sober Mom I used to be.
Keep pushing forward people...it is so worth it!
Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
Great story and happy your son is supporting you in this!
My daughters are 13 and 10. I don't know what they know if anything. The 13 year old especially has never been one to conceal anything. If she notices something, or thinks or feels something, she's going to come right out with it. The 10 year old saw me moving my bottle from one place to another several years ago. Once she asked, "Is that alcohol?!" I denied it and said it was a water bottle. She said, "Cuz I know my dad doesn't drink alcohol." I felt like a piece of sh1t. So, the day will come that I have a discussion about alcohol with them and let them know that I have had my share of struggles with it. I doubt I will get down to the nitty gritty details but I want them to know enough about it to hopefully avoid following in my footsteps.
My daughters are 13 and 10. I don't know what they know if anything. The 13 year old especially has never been one to conceal anything. If she notices something, or thinks or feels something, she's going to come right out with it. The 10 year old saw me moving my bottle from one place to another several years ago. Once she asked, "Is that alcohol?!" I denied it and said it was a water bottle. She said, "Cuz I know my dad doesn't drink alcohol." I felt like a piece of sh1t. So, the day will come that I have a discussion about alcohol with them and let them know that I have had my share of struggles with it. I doubt I will get down to the nitty gritty details but I want them to know enough about it to hopefully avoid following in my footsteps.
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
What a great moment you had with him!
Isn't it odd how we all think that we can fool those that are closest to us? My life right now is like a strange science experiment. I have been sober for long enough to understand addiction exactly for what it is. After getting sober I found out that my husband has a deep seated addiction which I always knew was a problem but never understood the depth while in my alcoholic haze. He's working on it and has asked me to trust him but here's the things that I witness now and just revel in the fact of how addiction is addiction is addiction. I see this and I get it. I never recognized any of these things before.
1.The lightheartedness and excitement of an addict who is about to get to use.
2.The levels of an addict's voice and their body language when they are lying about using when asked.
3. The silent remorse and their personality after they have used when they tried not to.
4. The trouble that they go to in order to use and hide it.
5. The creating of situations so that they can justify using. My husband will purposely do things that he knows aggravates me to try to set me off to create an "we're mad at each other so I might as well just go ahead and do X" type situation.
6. How they think that what they do to set up their ability to use can't be seen by others.
#6 is what gets me and ties right into your post. You were taken back by the fact that your son could hear you set down your beer can and exactly what was going on. I also identify with all of the above and did them all when I was drinking.
The only people that we are fooling is ourselves into believing that others can't see what's going on.
Congratulations, not only on your 12 days but the true relationship you're building with your son. That's such a big payoff!
Isn't it odd how we all think that we can fool those that are closest to us? My life right now is like a strange science experiment. I have been sober for long enough to understand addiction exactly for what it is. After getting sober I found out that my husband has a deep seated addiction which I always knew was a problem but never understood the depth while in my alcoholic haze. He's working on it and has asked me to trust him but here's the things that I witness now and just revel in the fact of how addiction is addiction is addiction. I see this and I get it. I never recognized any of these things before.
1.The lightheartedness and excitement of an addict who is about to get to use.
2.The levels of an addict's voice and their body language when they are lying about using when asked.
3. The silent remorse and their personality after they have used when they tried not to.
4. The trouble that they go to in order to use and hide it.
5. The creating of situations so that they can justify using. My husband will purposely do things that he knows aggravates me to try to set me off to create an "we're mad at each other so I might as well just go ahead and do X" type situation.
6. How they think that what they do to set up their ability to use can't be seen by others.
#6 is what gets me and ties right into your post. You were taken back by the fact that your son could hear you set down your beer can and exactly what was going on. I also identify with all of the above and did them all when I was drinking.
The only people that we are fooling is ourselves into believing that others can't see what's going on.
Congratulations, not only on your 12 days but the true relationship you're building with your son. That's such a big payoff!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: united kingdom
Posts: 48
Well done
Hi Luper nice to meet you. Well done on day 12 thats amazing i cannot imagine getting to day 4 never mind day 12 but i think if i remember rightly thats how it started before when i made it to 7 weeks twice. I am so glad you still have a good relationship with your son as kids are so important.
Look forward to exchanging more messages with you and the rest of the forum.
Look forward to exchanging more messages with you and the rest of the forum.
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