carguysgirl

My bf's HA D seems to be doing well! In the sudden and dramatic way of teen girls-she has a boyfriend-one who doesn't use hard drugs and who works! She is off H and staying with him and his family. She is smoking pot and drinking so I know it's not recovery at all-but at worst it's a reprieve from worry and at best could be a new beginning.
I am proud that my bf came to me with this update. I could tell he had some worries about a harsh negative reaction from me but he braved the waters and found them calm. t the advice and knowledge I've gained.

Ann

She has switched drugs, that's not likely to be a good thing considering her heroin addiction.

My prayers go out that she finds sobriety soon. Whether we worry or not, our addicted kids find sobriety in their own time...and it can drive us crazy waiting.

Hugs

zoso77

I'm afraid I have to disagree with this assessment. And I suspect after some reflection, you will come to see that nothing has really changed. She's still using. She's drinking. I would still be worried, and this doesn't qualify as a new beginning.

But, again, I suspect you know this.

Prepare for the worst. Then prepare some more. This ride is far from over.

carguysgirl

Yup. You're both right. Already after posting that I have images of her new bf here looking for support shine day. And wondering since she's receiving no counseling-in what erratic way will she try and"tickle her pleasure receptors" I remember reading something about that. I want so badly for it to be positive. Hoping for the best preparing for the worst. At least my bf is realizing that I can be trusted with his daughter's situation.

We had a fight just 2 weeks ago because I found a copy of learning to let go in a free pile. My bf said "well have no plans to learn to let go of my daughter." Way to glibly i replied that depending on how that goes I may have to learn to let him go. I'm not up for him grabbing his gun and going into danger again while I wait. I'll be gone before he gets home.
I had to give my dad up when I was 9 years old he left lost in his alcohol addiction. My mom has never recover from that and has lived on caffeine cigarettes stress and work since he left. So in ways I've had to let her go too-we're in touch-but she's killing herself (rapidly these days) with her choices-copd emphysema, leukemia and bladder cancer-still smokes. Brags she'll be on oxygen with cigarette in her hand. I love her and accept her as she is. I've let friends go when their addictions overtook their lives. Guess I'm an old hand at letting go. Doesn't make the prospect any easier. My bf is my soulmate. We plan to be hand fasted this year.

carguysgirl

Absolutely no input from anyone is rare here. I hope I didn't offend somehow.

bookmaven

Learn about cross-addiction and chemical dependency.

Substituting another drug or alcohol for the original drug of choice is a recipe for disaster.

This is not an improvement in the least. It's a major setback for recovery and often leads directly back to the original drug of choice or becoming addicted to the new drug or BOTH.

baby3times

I am new here and still learning but from my expeeience with my bf or I could now call ex, he'd always go to something else it never failed for him to return to his real addiction. I wish all the luck and hope she can get off everything to kniw what it truely feels like to be sober. Wishing the best of luck for u and ur family