Cowgirlie

I ask the question because I can't just have a few sweets from a bag, I eat the whole thing, even if it is a share bag... Coffee - I never have one cup, usually 4-5 across the morning. Pizza - you wont see any slices left on my plate, even if it's across an evening, the whole thing will go. I genuinely don't know how a colleague can leave a bag of crisps half finished on her desk and just pick at them occasionally, or make them last a few days?? Like, what?? JUST. EAT. THEM. ALL. NOWWWW!!! Or give them to me lol

Is this addictive personality or am I just greedy?? LOL. Think someone posted the other day about delayed gratification issues and I suppose it's along those lines? Binge-tastic, so it's no surprise I have been the same with alcohol all these years really. 'All or nothing' type of personality... I'm just so glad I've never tried drugs! Deliberately, as I think I know how that would go lol. Mind you having said that, I did try smoking and didn't enjoy it so happily I'm a non-smoker. I should be enormous with my appetite and eating but I've spent many years reaching the right balance to work out what I can get away with versus a healthy lifestyle lol. Just feels like I'm now doing the same with alcohol. Does any of that make sense??

Badger4

This sounds a bit like me. If there is an open package of certain foods in the house and I had one taste the rest would be gone. Sadly that also applies to beer and wine (box or bottle), although I could take or leave the hard stuff. Weird how the mind works.

changeiscoming

It makes total sense to me. If I buy a bag of candy I will eat the entire thing and then feel sick afterward. I do think it is part of an addictive personality. I have to fight it. I pack my lunch and snacks to bring to work so I don't binge. I don't keep anything in the house that I can binge on. there are days I fail but it is a war I will always fight. I do the same thing with cigarettes too. I found that when I quit drinking I started smoking alot more. Its like I have to find a way to self destruct instead of taking care of myself and that is what I am working on with my therapist. Why do I always choose substitutions that make me feel worse about myself. Probably goes with the fact that I have not learned to truly love myself yet and constantly beat myself up for all of my faults. A work on progess I am.

doggonecarl

It does. I think studies are being done that are trying to identify children with impulse control problems by scanning their brains. These parts of the brain are hot spots for certain kinds of substance abusers and drinkers and by identifying children with the same kind of brain activity, prevent addiction problems.

Jupiters

funny - I was talking to my BF about this not long ago. He noticed with me, it's a character trait I have that meshes with almost anything I do. There is no "middle" ground for me, whether it's drinking, cleaning, reading, dieting, exercising....I go full on or don't even bother. I need to find a happy balance between the 2, that's something I'm going to focus on. I need to learn patience (heh, don't we all) and the ability to slow down and enjoy and appreciate things.
I'm like a mad woman when I start something...reading, god I think I have like 5 books on the go. WHY? lol...pick one and focus on it for gods sake!!!

so yes, it makes sense

cl9000

When it comes to pizza, bags of chips, or bags of candy, I'm the same way... I'm going to eat the whole thing at once 99% of the time (maybe less so with chips… but I'll eat a whole bag in one day). And I don't usually do it in the living room in front of my roommates. I do it alone in my room or when they're not around. It's pretty weird when I stop to think about it, but I assume it has something to do with addictive personality. I also drink alone in my room usually (excuse me, *drank*, past tense, alone). I'm not even really overweight and I generally try to eat healthy, but when I get the craving for things, I'm going to get them, and I'm going to eat them all at once. Thankfully it doesn't happen too often, so I don't feel like I have to resist the urges too much when they do come up. I mean hey, it's better than drinking a liter of rum in a night, right?

Cowgirlie

Hey Carl, interesting. Wonder if it's linked to risk-taking too? I love taking risks and have been very lucky that many have paid off, better than I could have hoped actually with respect to lifestyle, emigrating, trying out a new career etc. Even little things like looking for a parking space near house (congested roads and traffic problems where I live).. my husband will always park at the local school with guaranteed places then walk the 100m home. I will consistently, ALWAYS drive past our house JUST IN CASE there is a space in the very limited number of spaces there as it's 10m from our house... there rarely is, and I just go round the block back to the school (you can imagine my husband's speech at this point lol) BUT on the days I find an empty space I get the biggest kick, like I KNEW it was a good idea to take a risk! Maybe I'm just lazy hahahaha!! I am also always late for things, as I always over-optimistically think things will take less time than they invariably do. I even read there was a study that showed people who like snakes tend to drive faster and take more risks... just seems like it's all on a continuum to me, or certainly not distant cousins lol!

FreeOwl

alcohol, cocaine, coffee, candy, pizza, exercise....

zero or a thousand. Always seems to have been that way.

Verte

Cowgirlie - the above ^^^ is so interesting!

Great thread my new friend. Congrats on almost 2 weeks of being without alcohol.

Yes! To answer your question about all or nothing. My parents are the same way as were their parents and on and on, regarding many aspects of life. With the exception of love which is quite sad to me.

It is interesting because I married someone who has a similar experience with similar parents. Together we have been like that old kid's cartoon where the two super heroes put their power rings together and say, "wonder twins, activate! Form of an elephant. Form of a bucket of water". How this is working for us is an entire separate novella.

Once I started looking not just at alcohol, but addiction in general, the manifestations and tendencies started popping up everywhere. For example, you know the whole "if you are going to do something, do it right" mentality...my parents applied it to our chores. One of my chores was cleaning the da*& toilet. No need for a second shot...I learned the hard way to clean it 'right' the first time.

During my first few weeks of my sobriety, my toilet essentially became a spit shined monument to doing things 'right'. With every frustrating urge or craving for alcohol around dinnertime, I dropped everything and went to clean the bowl, again. No coincidence I'm sure.

Food was never an issue for me, but it has been an ongoing battle for my mother and it drives me *insane* when she visits.

I've been mulling the idea of talking with a child psychologist about how these tendencies in the family affect a child's development and sense of self...your thread has just solidified that I must.

OK. Thanks for this Cowgirlie. It was so nice to spend time with you in the weekender thread. Glad you are here and doing well. Keep going!! Stay strong.

NO speeding car=no speeding tickets

desypete

i drink far to much tea and i eat far to much chocolate
i enjoy my life and eating chocolate or drinking tea isnt going to cost me a night in jail or break my familys hearts on a daily basis or have the bad impacts that booze had on me

so i accept the way i am i aviod things that are really bad for me like gambling or even a computer playing games or being online to long as they steal my time and i can end up feeling addicted to the computer it can over take my life and stop me from going out to meeting people etc
so i have to have strict rules for my usage or not do it at all like facebook i have an account but dont hardly ever use it these days as i used to use that as a tool to find myself a women who could love me and fix me
so out it went when i started to learn about me and my personality
i have yet to give up drinking tea so much but i have cut down on the choclate intake a bit
but they dont hurt me like booze can or other things like even a computer can so they can stay for now lol
or until i get hurt putting the kettle on or something stupid like that lol

GracieLou

I am the same way. Once I get it in my face, all bets are off. Bottle of booze, bag of chips, candy, nuts (almonds, peanuts, cashews), Klondike bars, Coke Zero, Cigarettes..etc etc.

Once I start, I can't stop. Sweet or salty. Once I have it I want more and more and more. I need a continuous flow all day long. UGGG it is an everyday ongoing battle.

Sometimes I can do real good for a couple weeks and then even eating a banana sets my sweet tooth into motion and I will eat three candy bars during the day trying to satisfy the craving. Horrible!

LBrain

Interesting. I'll add this. I have gone through periods of substitution or just plain ole not caring what I eat just give it to me - a salty bag of potato chips (crisps) would disappear in no time, including dipping my finger tips in the greasy salt at the bottom of the bag. I could go through a pound of chocolate truffles in a couple days, or less.

Now, after almost six months I am finding myself starting to moderate again. I haven't had a piece of candy or chocolate for a couple weeks at least. Potato chips are not high on the list of things I want to ingest. I am slowly getting back to healthful eating habits.
I am cooking ribs this Friday tho.

I also know I am getting better because I told a friend I was looking at a job in Utah yesterday. He told me I would have to become a polygamist if I moved to Utah - haha.

I said yeah I know, but three would be my limit! Now that's what I call moderation!

GracieLou

LOL LBrain.

I seem to fluctuate too. Sometimes I am good to go and it does not even occur to me to stuff junk in my gob, other times, well, I eat like a pig at a trough. I just can't seem to get enough junk.

I call it munchie mouth...lol

I don't want food in the sense of meat and taters, I want junk. The saltier and the sweeter(chocolate) the better.

Jupiters

great, now I want poutine and a bag of Doritos.

anotherquitter

For me it can be as simple as a blueberry muffin. If the store next door has them when I pick up a paper at morning break then I just have to buy one. Even if I've just told myself I won't do it. And sometimes I have to go back for a second one. Even though I know it will make me uncomfortably full.

It's like we have an ON/OFF switch - moderation be dammed - full speed ahead!

Wastinglife

I am the same way Cowgirlie. Some people's 'reward' system in the brain is wired differently. As a kid, I was a binge eater, then I discovered alcohol and cigarettes, then drugs. I needed it all at once.

The way you described how you wonder at your co-worker who can just nibble at a bag of chips is how I feel when I would go out to the pub with friends. They would sip their pints for at least 30 mins min before they got another. I was just amazed cuz I would be ordering my 4th pint after 30 mins at a pub.

Some of us are hard-wired with addictive brains.

ForgetfulKevin

Hmm. Last night I had half a bag of ginger snap cookies and half a bag of pretzels, after having had a big dinner earlier. Hmm. Something to watch out for.

Actually, I remember there's a book (title is something like "Fat, Sugar, Salt") about how most commercial factory snacks came to be designed so that they are essentially addictive -- sorry, I meant incredibly enticing once you get started. "We dare you to eat just one!"

"Munchie mouth" -- I'll remember that, GracieLou!

GracieLou

I think you are right. There was a guy at work that had a small canister of smoked almonds on his desk for TWO WEEKS...WTF? It bothered me. I wondered how in the world he did that. I would eat that in one hour...lol

I have to keep my canister at home and put just a serving in a snack bag to take to work or else..GONE!

That is how I drank too and I could not understand the person that sipped their drink. WTF? They would stir it and then let it sit. I was on drink four before they were getting their second.

I thought something was wrong with them...LOL (God forbid I look at myself in that bar miror :P)

mburnsc

I'm fairly certain this is typical of alcoholics. I'm like this 100%. So are a lot of my family members. When I'm drinking, I'm 20+ beers in and want to know where the coke is at and wake the next day ordering some more beers. When I quit drinking I'm smoking pot 24/7. When I quit everything I start eating like crazy and become an exercise addict, plus video games + whatever I can get. Nothing is worth doing unless it's 110%.

It can be a good thing but I'm sure most of us have had a lot of problems because of this.

mburnsc

The thing I hate most about it is that I do this until I suck the fun and enjoyment out of whatever the particular substance, activity is. I envy the people that do just enough of all the things I enjoy and therefore get the full enjoyment out of it and don't ruin it for themselves.