Caged Bird. Maya Angelou
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: England
Posts: 405
Caged Bird. Maya Angelou
Just wanted to share this. Maya passed the other day but her poetry will live on.
Caged Bird
By Maya Angelou
A free bird leaps
on the back of the wind
and floats downstream
till the current ends
and dips his wing
in the orange sun rays
and dares to claim the sky.
But a bird that stalks
down his narrow cage
can seldom see through
his bars of rage
his wings are clipped and
his feet are tied
so he opens his throat to sing.
The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.
The free bird thinks of another breeze
and the trade winds soft through the sighing trees
and the fat worms waiting on a dawn bright lawn
and he names the sky his own
But a caged bird stands on the grave of dreams
his shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
his wings are clipped and his feet are tied
so he opens his throat to sing.
The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.
Caged Bird
By Maya Angelou
A free bird leaps
on the back of the wind
and floats downstream
till the current ends
and dips his wing
in the orange sun rays
and dares to claim the sky.
But a bird that stalks
down his narrow cage
can seldom see through
his bars of rage
his wings are clipped and
his feet are tied
so he opens his throat to sing.
The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.
The free bird thinks of another breeze
and the trade winds soft through the sighing trees
and the fat worms waiting on a dawn bright lawn
and he names the sky his own
But a caged bird stands on the grave of dreams
his shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
his wings are clipped and his feet are tied
so he opens his throat to sing.
The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still
and his tune is heard
on the distant hill
for the caged bird
sings of freedom.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: England
Posts: 405
I'm back in the drink, man. I'ts so incredibly frustrated that I can't express how I feel. I am anesthetised with alcohol. A zombie. I put the drink down for a few days, last week. It was the greatest feeling of relief, that I could make the changes that I need. I am back to being comatose.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: England
Posts: 405
I Have some plans bim, I have had so much good advice here from the wise, it's never ignored. I just need to put down the drink for a while so that my mind can comprehend reason and rational thinking. I can get something going then. But I just cave so easy. It's not my weak will. It's regrets of the past and a complete fear of dippiing into the unknown future. I'm terrified of it! I need to have some faith, I think. Easier said then done, for an alkie. I Have to man, at some point. Let me see the dark crevasse and jump! You know?
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You know, I'm torn between ripping my own flesh off with my fingers or to punch the walls in anger at myself. I would like to think I will look back at this time as if it were a nightmare.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
When you have a little sober time under your belt, the past loses its sting and the future looks bright.
I remember that time all too well, where all I did was obsessively beat myself up or worry about my future.
Really I only have today. That's why "Just for today" or "One day at a time" is so powerful. I try to stay in the moment. We all have memories that are unpleasant. The trick is to put them where they belong. Unchangeable. With God's help I can let them go, knowing that I am forgiven.
Be kind to yourself. None of us are perfect.
I remember that time all too well, where all I did was obsessively beat myself up or worry about my future.
Really I only have today. That's why "Just for today" or "One day at a time" is so powerful. I try to stay in the moment. We all have memories that are unpleasant. The trick is to put them where they belong. Unchangeable. With God's help I can let them go, knowing that I am forgiven.
Be kind to yourself. None of us are perfect.
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 10
JimJim. Please do not beat yourself up. You are a beautiful spirit. I can see that just by you posting that poem. We have all been or are currently "caged birds." I have recently set myself free and it all seems so clear now that I am sober. But the journey has been a long one, with a lot of trials not only for myself but everyone around me. However, those glitches in my journey were part of what brought me to where I am now and I have no doubt that the same is for you. Some people just aren't ready yet. More strength is needed. This period of trials will bring you the strength you need. Just stay focused on the present moment. The past is what it is. You cannot change it. You cannot determine the future. Only the present moment is real and you cannot control that either. You can only take it in and enjoy every part of it. The beauty of the birds, the sky, everything that surrounds you at this moment. My grandmother had a plaque on her fireplace growing up. Recently my husband was able to track it down and give it to me. The words have proved invaluable. "Yard by yard, life is hard. Inch by inch, it's a cinch.". No words ring more true at this moment in my life. You can do this my friend. We alcoholics feel the need to control our surroundings. It is only once we realize that we cannot control them and can only enjoy what is that life becomes grand. One thing that has helped me tremendously, is to remove all negativity from my life. This includes friends who are not willing to go on my journey with me and the media, which only shows the negative in a world that is mostly good. There is so much good in this world. Focus on that for this moment and it will get you to the next. Blessings to you.
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Jim I'm glad you posted the heartbreaking & beautiful poem. It's been awhile since I read it.
Please don't stop posting Jim. You are one of us - we all understand what you're going through.
Please don't stop posting Jim. You are one of us - we all understand what you're going through.
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Jim...I've a question...why did you not post when you had a few sober days last week?
That's the time when the support could have really helped you. When we drink and post (and I did it when I first joined), the alcohol distorts our perceptions. We can't see or really appreciate what people are saying to us. We can easily become over-sensitive and mis-read things.
Make tomorrow your day 1. Don't drink and instead come here and lean on us. It could be a turning point for you...
Thinking of you Jim
x
That's the time when the support could have really helped you. When we drink and post (and I did it when I first joined), the alcohol distorts our perceptions. We can't see or really appreciate what people are saying to us. We can easily become over-sensitive and mis-read things.
Make tomorrow your day 1. Don't drink and instead come here and lean on us. It could be a turning point for you...
Thinking of you Jim
x
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 10
So, I put a lot of heart into that post. I wasn't trying to make you upset, JimJim. But now I feel bad. I am a recovering alcoholic too. Only three weeks sober and if I am only going to upset people when I am trying to help, I don't want any part of it. This isn't easy for any of us. I'm done here too.
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 10
I clearly am not ready for this site right now. Alcoholics, including myself, say things that they don't really mean because their reality is often altered. I am too new to this to deal with this kind of emotion. You hurt me. I don't care if you're an alcoholic. You don't have a right to do that, just like I didn't have a right to do it to my friends and family. I am crying now and I am done.
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Originally Posted by sunshine4ever 
I clearly am not ready for this site right now. Alcoholics, including myself, say things that they don't really mean because their reality is often altered. I am too new to this to deal with this kind of emotion. You hurt me. I don't care if you're an alcoholic. You don't have a right to do that, just like I didn't have a right to do it to my friends and family. I am crying now and I am done.
And we hope you do too. We stick together at SR
x
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 10
Sorry, all. I overreacted. Just still fragile right now. Thanks to messages from Jeni and Dee, I realize not to take it personally and am not going to leave because this site offers a lot more positive than negative and everyone has their own trials they are dealing with. I can't take it personally.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
I second Dee - why are you running away from us, Jim? Probably because you are afraid... of the unknown (of recovery). But clearly long for it, too.
"The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still"
Try not to run if you can. For me it took a couple years of being back and forth, I read a lot on SR but posted very spuriously and I was usually drunk or planning to drink. Then at one point it sunk in... and I'm sober and very active posting since.
You CAN do this!
"The caged bird sings
with a fearful trill
of things unknown
but longed for still"
Try not to run if you can. For me it took a couple years of being back and forth, I read a lot on SR but posted very spuriously and I was usually drunk or planning to drink. Then at one point it sunk in... and I'm sober and very active posting since.
You CAN do this!
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