Day 5
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: In the tropics
Posts: 25
Day 5
Well another day down along the path.
Today is not a great day. At work and feeling just about as sad and weepy as I have ever been. Driving in to work I just kept thinking "why the hell am i doing this if i feel worse than on the hooch?"
Then i got a beautiful letter from a dear friend who has been 25 years sober. I met her at some ACIM classes. It was a helpful email. But damn... i am so an anxious and hopeless and sad. My half tab of benzo helps a bit but i am being judicious and only taking a half tab once a day when it gets too much. I dont want to swap one addiction for another.
The worst part is that my poor daughter is so used to me being drunk as normal that she thinks something is seriously wrong with me. Funny in a sick and twisted sort of way. But she is too young to explain it to her.
Anyway... checking in on a very hard day. Am still here. That is something i guess.
Today is not a great day. At work and feeling just about as sad and weepy as I have ever been. Driving in to work I just kept thinking "why the hell am i doing this if i feel worse than on the hooch?"
Then i got a beautiful letter from a dear friend who has been 25 years sober. I met her at some ACIM classes. It was a helpful email. But damn... i am so an anxious and hopeless and sad. My half tab of benzo helps a bit but i am being judicious and only taking a half tab once a day when it gets too much. I dont want to swap one addiction for another.
The worst part is that my poor daughter is so used to me being drunk as normal that she thinks something is seriously wrong with me. Funny in a sick and twisted sort of way. But she is too young to explain it to her.
Anyway... checking in on a very hard day. Am still here. That is something i guess.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
"Today is not a great day. At work and feeling just about as sad and weepy as I have ever been. Driving in to work I just kept thinking "why the hell am i doing this if i feel worse than on the hooch?"
It can lead you away from jail, a mental instatution and/or a very miserable period leading to death.
It will never get better if we continue to drink and are alcoholics.
BE WELL
"Today is not a great day. At work and feeling just about as sad and weepy as I have ever been. Driving in to work I just kept thinking "why the hell am i doing this if i feel worse than on the hooch?"
It can lead you away from jail, a mental instatution and/or a very miserable period leading to death.
It will never get better if we continue to drink and are alcoholics.
BE WELL
Mary2
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Scotland
Posts: 215
Be proud your on day 5 I'm only at 7. Take it easy and distract yourself from negative thoughts as much as possible. I'm having a rough one too but I know that the benefits will outweigh this. Your daughter ultimately will be very happy to have you sober. Xxxxx
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,649
Congratulations on five days. You are doing great. That first week is the hardest. Just keep on keeping on. If you need to find a quiet place and cry, go ahead. It too will pass. Don't give up. We are all here for you. Be kind to yourself. You got this!
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