I relapsed again yesterday... =(
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Location: cambridge
Posts: 5
I relapsed again yesterday... =(
Hi i have realized I have been binge drinking for a while... I stopped drinking on my birthday on april. Last friday couldn't go to work because of a cold and started drinking again. I just put the alcohol down the sink. Today starting from scratch again...
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Anger and resentment are deadly for alcoholics...I hope you can learn to forgive and let go of anger and resentment.
Try this for learning to overcome resentment.
Try this for learning to overcome resentment.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 405
Your post made me think of the contradictions in thought from the euphoria of drinking to the despair of drinking.
To go from the state of mind of purchase of alcohol and happiness to drink it to the sickness, truth and dumping down the drain.
The delusion that we can safely purchase and consume alcohol ensnares us and then we have the inevitable consequences.
This is the baffling nature of alcoholism.
We learned we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholic.
What does that mean?
That means we understand what it means to be alcoholic. We know we have an obsession to keep drinking and a physical reaction that will ensure that we destroy ourselves as well.
We must be convinced that we will get burned and keep from putting our hand on the stove.
Would we put our hand on a hot stove? No. Absolutely not. No one could make us put our hand on a hot burner and hold it there.
Yet, we drink, and we know it will burn us. Not instantly, but soon.
When I drink, I drink too much always. When I drink, I get sick always. When I drink, I get drunk always. Why would I drink?
Delusion
I like the effects produced by alcohol...the good ones...and can ignore the bad ones for that initial payoff.
Until I concede, and realize that with my own hand, I am killing myself.
It's an awful place to be and we have to be there in order to change.
You never have to take another drink. Find your truth, and take steps each day to keep your mind close to the truth and wrong motives.
"MOST OF US have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals--usually brief--were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better."
More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3, Alcoholics Anonymous
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/
To go from the state of mind of purchase of alcohol and happiness to drink it to the sickness, truth and dumping down the drain.
The delusion that we can safely purchase and consume alcohol ensnares us and then we have the inevitable consequences.
This is the baffling nature of alcoholism.
We learned we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholic.
What does that mean?
That means we understand what it means to be alcoholic. We know we have an obsession to keep drinking and a physical reaction that will ensure that we destroy ourselves as well.
We must be convinced that we will get burned and keep from putting our hand on the stove.
Would we put our hand on a hot stove? No. Absolutely not. No one could make us put our hand on a hot burner and hold it there.
Yet, we drink, and we know it will burn us. Not instantly, but soon.
When I drink, I drink too much always. When I drink, I get sick always. When I drink, I get drunk always. Why would I drink?
Delusion
I like the effects produced by alcohol...the good ones...and can ignore the bad ones for that initial payoff.
Until I concede, and realize that with my own hand, I am killing myself.
It's an awful place to be and we have to be there in order to change.
You never have to take another drink. Find your truth, and take steps each day to keep your mind close to the truth and wrong motives.
"MOST OF US have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals--usually brief--were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better."
More About Alcoholism, Chapter 3, Alcoholics Anonymous
http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New York, New York
Posts: 35
Catalan - Getting home at night, after a long day of work, was very hard for me in the early days (and it still is! though less so). A method I relied on heavily in responding to impulses was to take my mind back to the nightmare that lead me to Day 1 in the first place. If you can visualize why you want to stop, and feel that pain that alcohol brought to you, maybe that will keep you from drinking. In fact it might even make you happy -- I'm glad that I never have to go through again what brought me here, because I will never drink again.
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