Courage To Change: 05/19/14
Behold the power of NO
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Courage To Change: 05/19/14
In the past, whenever anyone disagreed with me I took it as a personal failure. If only I had found the right words, clothes, opinions, school, job, home, friends, or lover, I could have belonged. And how did others appear to me? Happy and selfconfident— they seemed to have all the answers. But because of the front I put on, people thought I was easygoing and happy, too. If they could be so mistaken about the way I really felt, couldn’t I have a few wrong ideas about their feelings? After all, I couldn’t be the only one who put on a good act. Wasn’t I comparing my insides to other people’s outsides? In Al-Anon I am learning that someone can disagree with me without either of us being wrong. When no one has to be wrong, we can all fit in, just as we are.
Today’s Reminder
If I compare, I lose. Maybe I’ll come out feeling better than somebody this time, but next time I’m bound to feel worse. The best way to stop feeling that I’m not good enough is to stop comparing altogether.
“Little by little, we come to realize at our meetings that much of our discomfort comes from our attitudes.”
Understanding Ourselves and Alcoholism
If I compare, I lose. Maybe I’ll come out feeling better than somebody this time, but next time I’m bound to feel worse. The best way to stop feeling that I’m not good enough is to stop comparing altogether.
“Little by little, we come to realize at our meetings that much of our discomfort comes from our attitudes.”
Understanding Ourselves and Alcoholism
Behold the power of NO
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
I learned that lesson some years ago the hard way when I lost everything and became homeless. I had to re evaluate my values and face how truly materialistic I was and to stop judging myself using other people's outsides as a measure. I am grateful I was able to learn the lesson otherwise I would have just sunk deep into depression and never kicked back up. I survived and made a come back but I probably will never have the kind of money I used to have and it's ok. I like my jeans and sweaters and nowadays I don't need to spend 200 on a dress or shoes I ll wear a couple of times. I like myself (well most of the time anyway it's a work in progress LOL).
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