sambolette

I am a meth addict. my best friend and I were both meth addicts. We started dating after a five year friendship. he is now in drug cour court and had to move back in with his mom, as his best friend and his girlfriend I have agreed to become clean. . the first 4 weeks i was clean completely no meth no marijuana no alcohol no nothing. during the 4 weeks he was accusing me of still using. I deleted people off of Facebook changed my phone number even moved to to his county because hes not allowed to leave it. I've also been attending NA meetings with him
I have never ever given him a reason not to trust me, after our first fight because he was still accusing me of still getting high. I got high.

all of my family are tweekers... he was the one person I depended on the whole time he had no faith in me. No belief. I gave up and I gave in to the drug.
He doesnt know that though.
I'm scared to loose him, but I'm more afraid of loosing myself. I gave it my all and got shot down by my rock. I'm his rock, so I don't let him see the addict side of me.

I'm scared. I want positivity. He's always negative.
What do I do?

least

Welcome to the SR family. Do you want to get clean again? Why not go to NA meetings on your own. He doesn't sound very supportive. You may just have to carry on with your life without him for a while.

I'm glad you joined us.

Sunflower92663

Be more afraid of losing yourself if you have to live a double life the idea of him as your rock may just be an illusion. However as addicts, we all get trapped in that illusion. Welcome to SR! it's private here so feel free to share.