Hawk07

I'm drinking now and i'm a mess. I've been lurking and posting on here for the past 6 months. I've lost everything...fiance, job. Imagining what it would be like to live in a cardboard box now

Hawk07

You all must be wondering how much I drink. A 5th of vodka, two 6 packs and and maybe a couple bottles of wine every week

Alphabet

Hi hawk. You're not alone. You came to a good place

Have you seen a doctor? Maybe go to the hospital?

Dee74

I'm sorry to hear you're in a bad way Hawk.

I think a Dr or a hospital would be a good first step...I can;t remember what your position is on AA but I figure if things are that bad, anything that might give you support couldn't hurt?

D

Chicagoan

Hawk, we all have been in that rotten situation.
Get yourself to a detox center as soon as you possibly can.
At some point you have to throw up the white flag.

Hawkeye13

It's good you are posting--we understand what it's like.

What are your plans for stopping? It sounds like going in for detox would be a good idea.

You can beat this. Just start with today.

Hawk07

I just woke up and it's still today... The last time I went to my Dr was 3 months ago. I was slapped with a
$500 bill that my insurance wouldn't cover and a permanent record of alcoholism. Good luck to me on getting another job.

Hawk07

I'm a complete mess. I've hit the pits.

aussieblue

You have made the effort to reach out for help here and that's a great start. Now try and reach out for some medical help. Thinking of you.

Thepatman

Hi, i am Pat and am sorry for what you are going trough.

If you are drinking please try to remember the booze is killing your ability to think straight. Give yourself a chance and put the bottle down.

Easy? Hell no, worth it hell yes! See this like a battle, either you or IT makes it.

I pick YOU to win

Hawk07

Chicagoan

"permanent record of alcoholism. Good luck to me on getting another job."
__________________
I believe that your medical records are confidential.

Thepatman

?
What does this mean?

Chicagoan

Patman nailed it on the head.
It truly is a battle. One that you
must win! You will get wounded,
but you can win, Many have.

Hawk07

I can't walk to the ER and driving would land me in a jail cell at best. I'm terrified.

aussieblue

Is there someone you can call?

wensical003

Hi Hawk, I am also very sad to hear this. Your pain is coming through loud and clear and it hurts! I believe in the old saying that " sometimes we have to hit rock bottom and lose important things in life to give us a "reality check" about just how dire our situation is. Some may think that's a bad thing but I tend to disagree. No it's not good losing a loved one or a job but you know what? You are still alive and breathing. A great quote from a book I'm reading is " here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if you are alive it isn't" (Richard Bach). The book is called " When God winks at you" by Squire Rushnell. It's worth reading. I will pray for you and for you to overcome this battle. I am having my own battle with alcohol and it sure isn't easy. Stay strong and have faith that you can overcome it......I'm gonna try to do the same

Thepatman

Great post, try to seek solutions, Alcohol's hooks can be hard to untangle. Your AV as we call it in SR will convince you that you are helpless.

You are more powerful than you think my friend

Dee74

If you can't walk there or get a cab, call 911 Hawk.

The only way to break this cycle is get some help.
D

wensical003

Yes you should call 911 or call a friend or relative.