nursing home or regiment
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 458
nursing home or regiment
I guess I am preplexed.
A neighbor gal had emergency surgery- for brain aneurisms. This is dangerous and some do not make it.
She is home now. But her boyfriend watches her every move. She is not allowed to drive or anything. He is helpful to a point- BUT- she is not allowed to drive anywhere or talk to anyone.
(yes - she was a pill popper too)
Right now her boyfriend is getting high on pot.
He blame her recreational pill use as the reason she needed brain surgery.
So her choice now is follow his orders or go into a nursing home.
Some choice!
A neighbor gal had emergency surgery- for brain aneurisms. This is dangerous and some do not make it.
She is home now. But her boyfriend watches her every move. She is not allowed to drive or anything. He is helpful to a point- BUT- she is not allowed to drive anywhere or talk to anyone.
(yes - she was a pill popper too)
Right now her boyfriend is getting high on pot.
He blame her recreational pill use as the reason she needed brain surgery.
So her choice now is follow his orders or go into a nursing home.
Some choice!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Calif
Posts: 757
she does not have any family to step in like siblings?
i dont know what country your from, but in most states they have adult protective services. they might step in to investigate on her behalf.
i worked in long term nursing care centers, and that is a sad part of life that some people who do not have family or their family does not want to claim or help them any more end up in nursing homes, usually on government funding, which means little financial support for anything extra such as stamps for letters, books, new clothing, or a small tv.
i dont know what country your from, but in most states they have adult protective services. they might step in to investigate on her behalf.
i worked in long term nursing care centers, and that is a sad part of life that some people who do not have family or their family does not want to claim or help them any more end up in nursing homes, usually on government funding, which means little financial support for anything extra such as stamps for letters, books, new clothing, or a small tv.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 458
I am in US- Penn.
She plans to have the bfs daughter over night. She, he and I are age 50.
I dont know how sever her condition is- but if someone tries to take my drivers license from me- they will have a problem.
Both of these people are neighbors of mine. I let a 3rd neighbor that we are close to know what happened.
If she gets put in a home that means her SSDI would be cut off- then bye bye to her apartment-- and if she cant drive bye bye to the car for which there is a payment.
She plans to have the bfs daughter over night. She, he and I are age 50.
I dont know how sever her condition is- but if someone tries to take my drivers license from me- they will have a problem.
Both of these people are neighbors of mine. I let a 3rd neighbor that we are close to know what happened.
If she gets put in a home that means her SSDI would be cut off- then bye bye to her apartment-- and if she cant drive bye bye to the car for which there is a payment.
Linkin Park Enthusiast
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 548
The boyfriend has no legal right to do any of that to her. Period. If they were married, it might be different.
She needs to be strong enough to realize that-but she probably isn't, and she is probably going with it because she doesn't know what else to do.
Maybe you guys could talk to her when he is not around and tell her that she does have other options, like get a social worker who can help her out, someone who really does care about her well-being, etc.
She needs to be strong enough to realize that-but she probably isn't, and she is probably going with it because she doesn't know what else to do.
Maybe you guys could talk to her when he is not around and tell her that she does have other options, like get a social worker who can help her out, someone who really does care about her well-being, etc.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 458
I am not sure what to do. For starters tho I felt a neighbor who knows all 3 of us should know.
I dont know if he is the emergency contact on her medical stuff. He grabs her phone and hardly lets her out of his site. Also I am a male- so it could look bad if I am talking to her. You know- like I might try to date her.
Also- I am not sure the extent of the damage of the brain surgery. I view the secrecy of it all as dangerous.
I did mention to her that maybe should could call the battered womans shelter.
I dont know if he is the emergency contact on her medical stuff. He grabs her phone and hardly lets her out of his site. Also I am a male- so it could look bad if I am talking to her. You know- like I might try to date her.
Also- I am not sure the extent of the damage of the brain surgery. I view the secrecy of it all as dangerous.
I did mention to her that maybe should could call the battered womans shelter.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Calif
Posts: 757
sound like she is isolated by her BF too. also sounds like he might be using her for a home, and that SSI. i can see her not allowed to drive given her condition. she might have long term side effects that make driving a danger. but not talking to any one. strange. sounds like there is more to it.
i hope she is safe in that environment.
i hope she is safe in that environment.
Linkin Park Enthusiast
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 548
Well you could always call Social Services and report the situation.
Since she is on SSDI, that might be a safe route-what if he is taking all her money anyway, and she's about to lose everything anyway because her bills haven't been paid? You are worried about her safety, she needs a...I don't know what to call it, I want to say guardian ad litem but that is for kids. Social worker? You are worried about her welfare and fear that the boyfriend is forcing her into a situation where he can take advantage of her.
Something like that. If you go to the police station and ask general questions, they will tell you where to go. You don't have to file a report or anything like that, although when you get to Social Services you will have to. It's all anonymous.
Since she is on SSDI, that might be a safe route-what if he is taking all her money anyway, and she's about to lose everything anyway because her bills haven't been paid? You are worried about her safety, she needs a...I don't know what to call it, I want to say guardian ad litem but that is for kids. Social worker? You are worried about her welfare and fear that the boyfriend is forcing her into a situation where he can take advantage of her.
Something like that. If you go to the police station and ask general questions, they will tell you where to go. You don't have to file a report or anything like that, although when you get to Social Services you will have to. It's all anonymous.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 458
Hi everybody. I just came from the neighbor we all know. I talked to her some more. She tried to phone over.
See- Mr Neighbor wants MS Brain to move in with him. I dont think MS Brain would just drive to be defiant. He made a comment to me- that his sex drive was wearing on her.
Tonight Mr Nieghbors 30 year old daughter will be spending the night with Ms Brain. She plans to have a talk with her- about how smothered she feels.
In front of Mr Neighbor and Ms Brain- I said be sure to go see Mrs 80 year old neighbor. Today Mrs 80 called and that call was not answered.
I get the impression that ladies can figure this out better then I can. (I am a male)
I flat out told Mrs 80 that this could be a ploy of Mr neighbor to get Ms Brain to live under the same roof as him.
I guess I wonder what warning signs I should look for. Knowing that he grabs her phone. In the past I could text her and call her. But now- I am not so sure. The thing is- they both agreed that she would go see Mrs 80. It has been a week and nothing.
See- Mr Neighbor wants MS Brain to move in with him. I dont think MS Brain would just drive to be defiant. He made a comment to me- that his sex drive was wearing on her.
Tonight Mr Nieghbors 30 year old daughter will be spending the night with Ms Brain. She plans to have a talk with her- about how smothered she feels.
In front of Mr Neighbor and Ms Brain- I said be sure to go see Mrs 80 year old neighbor. Today Mrs 80 called and that call was not answered.
I get the impression that ladies can figure this out better then I can. (I am a male)
I flat out told Mrs 80 that this could be a ploy of Mr neighbor to get Ms Brain to live under the same roof as him.
I guess I wonder what warning signs I should look for. Knowing that he grabs her phone. In the past I could text her and call her. But now- I am not so sure. The thing is- they both agreed that she would go see Mrs 80. It has been a week and nothing.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I think that asking Social Services to check this out is a good one. Neighbours don't get to say what goes on in anyone's home. If abuse is suspected then social services is the best one to see.
Linkin Park Enthusiast
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 548
Originally Posted by Ann 
I think that asking Social Services to check this out is a good one. Neighbours don't get to say what goes on in anyone's home. If abuse is suspected then social services is the best one to see.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
I concur.Social services.
Sounds like someone wants a slave
with an SSI check.
One of the most horrific parts of this addictive
nightmare is how these disgusting evil vampires
just LOVE it when someones life goes into a spiral.
(So they can be taken advantage of in any way you
can imagine).
These ghouls are like Cholera. Society has to
constantly suppress these untouchable maggots
who would find nothing wrong with selling 4 year
old girls.
I'd detail the bona fides of the scumbag corps whose
webs the addict I cared about fell into. Serial violent
felonies et al.But what would be the point?
Zoso said it best.....accountabilty is the nightmare
scenario in "scumworld" . They hate any and all that would
hold them to account. At the top of that list would of course
be cops, but officials that can summon force are not far
behind.
I pay for that SSI check. I do it so that people who
have had a rough time aren't treated like animals.
I also pay for professionals who weed out ghouls
intent on preying on the weak......and making an
example out of them.
Sounds like someone wants a slave
with an SSI check.
One of the most horrific parts of this addictive
nightmare is how these disgusting evil vampires
just LOVE it when someones life goes into a spiral.
(So they can be taken advantage of in any way you
can imagine).
These ghouls are like Cholera. Society has to
constantly suppress these untouchable maggots
who would find nothing wrong with selling 4 year
old girls.
I'd detail the bona fides of the scumbag corps whose
webs the addict I cared about fell into. Serial violent
felonies et al.But what would be the point?
Zoso said it best.....accountabilty is the nightmare
scenario in "scumworld" . They hate any and all that would
hold them to account. At the top of that list would of course
be cops, but officials that can summon force are not far
behind.
I pay for that SSI check. I do it so that people who
have had a rough time aren't treated like animals.
I also pay for professionals who weed out ghouls
intent on preying on the weak......and making an
example out of them.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
