Somebody2014

I am new here, so not really sure how this works.
Well my husband is not drinking like he use to, but I think it is to late and that he is on his way out. He started filling up in the abdomen with Liver Ascites 5 years ago. I tried to get him tested for Cirrhosis, because about a year and a half ago he started having a very nasty odor. When he has bowel movements it literally stinks the whole house up and it is nauseating. The odor coming off from his skin is also icky and nauseating. He sleeps a lot and has the day/night reversal going on. I am sorry for this post, but how do I get him to see that there is a serious problem here. I got him seen by a GI doctor and they did an Ultrasound on him and told him that his liver is okay according to what he told me anyway, yet they put him on Spirinolactone. He told me that the doctor told him that his stomach muscles are all stretched out. Gees I wonder why. He thinks that he is in good health and that his terribly distended stomach is caused by his eating to much salt. I guess I am wondering if he is showing signs that he is on his way out? He refuses to even talk about the fact that he has cirrhosis and possible portal hypertension. Anyone have any answers?

Oh and he has been drinking Whiskey for over 45 years very heavily.

Mountainmanbob

Oh and he has been drinking Whiskey for over 45 years very heavily

It would be hard to be healthy after that

Somebody2014

I am very depressed and totally disgusted with this man. I am glad that he is not drinking, but shoot all through this marriage he did nothing, but drink and make an ass out of himself. He was not mean physically, but verbally he was at times. Most of the time he would just act stupid and think that he was funny. We have been married for nearly 31 years. He has quit drinking after I totally blew up at him and told him that either the bottle goes or he goes. I am shocked that he has not been drinking and very glad too, but I have this dreadful feeling that it is to late for him and that he is in ESLD and in total denial about it. I know that I can not force him to get medical help. I sure wish there was a way to. You see I have seen Alcoholics die from Cirrhosis and it is an ugly way to go for sure. I am just afraid that he is going to start hemorrhaging big time. Is anyone else going through this and how do I deal with this?

MissFixit

How do you know an actual MD said that his liver is okay if he has cirrhosis? That doesn't add up to me.

ladyscribbler

Well, if he wants to ignore this huge and obvious health problem, not much you can do. He's an adult.
In my Alanon group, I've heard lots of people say, "let them know you love them." You don't have to approve of or agree with their choices, but you can let them know you love them, even as you get out of the way of their addiction.
This must be horribly stressful, especially since you've experienced this before. What are you doing to take care of yourself? Have you looked into Alanon or Celebrate Recovery?
Take care of yourself, and welcome. So sorry you're going through this.

Somebody2014

He will not let me go to the doctor with him, so I only can hear what he is saying, but if the doctor did not think that he has Cirrhosis, then why did he put my husband on a strict low sodium diet and Spirinolactone? That water pill is used for folks with Cirrhosis. My dad had Cirrhosis that was caused by Anti-tripson Level A1 deficiency. My father never drank, but he had the ascites going on big time before he passed from a massive heart attack years ago. I have worked in the military on a general medicine ward and I have seen a lot of folks die from Cirrhosis. I know that in my heart that he does have Cirrhosis, yet he told me that the doctor told him that his liver is okay. It does not make sense to me either. I think that he is lying to me big time.

I have a lot of medical problems myself and do not drink at all and never have. I don't like the taste of alcohol at all. I have Lupus, Sjs, PA and Osteo of the major joints and spine and a lot of spinal problems. I am on disability, SSDI. I am just depressed, because I am worried that he is going to bleed to death and he is in denial big time and lying to me.

Mountainmanbob

PRESCRIBED FOR: Spironolactone removes excess fluid from the body in congestive heart failure, cirrhosis of the liver, and kidney disease. It can also be used in combination with other drugs to treat elevated blood pressure and for treating diuretic-induced low potassium (hypokalemia). Spironolactone also is used to counteract the effects of excessive adrenal aldosterone production (hyperaldosteronism). Aldosterone overproduction can occur from a tumor in the adrenal gland or enlarged adrenal glands (hyperplasia of the adrenal glands).

AnvilheadII

my daughter as a teenager was prescribed spironolactone for ACNE.

it will do you no good to fret and worry and imagine the very worst when the person you are worried about is not considering his condition that concerning. regardless of WHAT he has, you can't FIX it.

Somebody2014

Thank you all for your responses. I know that I can not fix him. I know that fretting about what is to come will not do anything for me except give me a headache. I just feel bad about it, because my twin sister and her family will not come to visit, because of the smell from him. He can take a shower and within 20 minutes that Nasty icky smell is back. I no longer sleep in the bed with him, because of the smell and the fact that he is constantly getting up all through the night and banging around. I have a lot of health problems myself and shoot I need the sleep at night.

Bernadette

You're darn right you need the sleep at night! Keep the focus on you and taking care of your own health issues....you know the saying "let go...or be dragged" this is a grown man who is choosing to manage his health the way he sees fit. Put yourself first and try not to expend your precious energy on worry.
Peace-
B

dandylion

Somebody2014.....Hon, there are some things are out of our control. They just are....no matter how much we wish that they weren't. I do know how hard it is to watch someone that I love be self-destructive and not be able to do anything about it. At a certain point you just have to say to "Let go and let god".

You may have to lean on those who love you. and, your higher power.

Try to remember that it is not of any use to him--at all--for you not to take care of yourself.

Please come here to vent as much as you need to. I think that most everyone can relate to your feelings of frustration and helplessness in one way or another. You are n ot alone.

dandylion

hopeful4

I was not aware that the odor of Cirrosis is that bad. Wow, your sister won't come over because of the smell of him? It must be horrible. Definitely something bad wrong there.

Hugs, it has to be tough. I am so sorry.

Somebody2014

Yes Hopeful, the odor of ESLD is quite profound. It is, because of Sulfur Dymethol or Fetor Hepaticus. It is pretty bad as it is a smell of body waste and it is nauseating to say the least. It has a lot to do with a persons Amonia level being high and them not digesting fats and lipeds correctly. The liver is not filtering out the toxins properly and leaving to much waste in the blood. I have tried to explain this to my husband, but he refuses to listen to me. His response is to immediately jump into the shower and 20 minutes later after the shower the smell is right back again. Trying to talk to him is literally like talking to a brick wall. I can not get him to understand that he is in for a seriously bad bad nightmare. I know that at this point, even if they do diagnose him with Cirrhosis, there is not much they can do. He definitely has Ascites. I mean it is very odvious. He is a thin man and he looks quite pregnant. I should not worry so much about it, because he sure as heck doesn't, but I know what is coming down the line and I am trying to prepare him. Oh well any suggestions on what to do than not anything I can do would be greatly appreciated.