Alcohol
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: South Florida
Posts: 29
Alcohol
I am addicted. I need help.
I am a successful engineer. I have two great little girls and a beautiful wife. I am acting like they mean nothing. I quit alcohol a million times. I don't know why I keep going back to it. I cheat myself telling I am a functional alcoholic.
I quit smoking a few years ago. Never went back to it. Why am I not able to quit alcohol.? Why is it so hard. Why am I doing things I do just to drink. Yesterday I went to drug store, got a six pack and finished 4 of them in the car (in the garage , not driving.. Thank God.).I did that because my wife won't let me drink beyond two beers. All in all, I downed 14 beers yesterday. I know it is 3 am. I know every morning after I make promises to not drink ever again. Only this time I am reaching out. Help..
I am a successful engineer. I have two great little girls and a beautiful wife. I am acting like they mean nothing. I quit alcohol a million times. I don't know why I keep going back to it. I cheat myself telling I am a functional alcoholic.
I quit smoking a few years ago. Never went back to it. Why am I not able to quit alcohol.? Why is it so hard. Why am I doing things I do just to drink. Yesterday I went to drug store, got a six pack and finished 4 of them in the car (in the garage , not driving.. Thank God.).I did that because my wife won't let me drink beyond two beers. All in all, I downed 14 beers yesterday. I know it is 3 am. I know every morning after I make promises to not drink ever again. Only this time I am reaching out. Help..
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 277
Welcome to SR Forum. You have landed at the right place to begin your journey to sober life. Keep posting and keep reading on SR.
So what is your plan for recovery ? Apart from SR are you considering some more support groups like AA, Lifering, Rational Recovery ?
You mentioned that you tried to quit million times . What was the longest period , you refrained from using Alcohol ? In our opinion, the 1st step , should be to consult a Doctor and seek his advice to tackle the withdrawal symptoms. Most of us fail to quit , because ,we do not plan to tackle the withdrawal symptoms in a scientific way. There will always be discomfort ,as there is no wonder drug which can make the detox completely comfortable. But reducing the intensity, will increase the chances of staying sober..
All the best.
So what is your plan for recovery ? Apart from SR are you considering some more support groups like AA, Lifering, Rational Recovery ?
You mentioned that you tried to quit million times . What was the longest period , you refrained from using Alcohol ? In our opinion, the 1st step , should be to consult a Doctor and seek his advice to tackle the withdrawal symptoms. Most of us fail to quit , because ,we do not plan to tackle the withdrawal symptoms in a scientific way. There will always be discomfort ,as there is no wonder drug which can make the detox completely comfortable. But reducing the intensity, will increase the chances of staying sober..
All the best.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: South Florida
Posts: 29
Thanks last chance for your reply. No I don't have a plan on how to quit. I don't even know what the withdrawal symptoms are because I never truly quit. The longest ever was 6 days. That was in the last 10 years. It didn't occur to me to check with the doctor. Thanks for the advice.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
6 days is plenty of time to experience withdrawal symptoms. Heck 2 days is enough time. In fact a hangover is actually withdrawal in a mild form. How recently was your 6 day break? You might try a 6 day break now and get wildly different results.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi hanita, you sound like a perfect candidate for SR, just like me. My first step towards recovery was to see a doctor and tell him everything. That's not easy, I know, but telling someone seems to help.
Then I did a lot of reading about alcohol, especially how bad it gets as time passes (it's progressive). You don't want to end up a final stage alcoholic, believe me.
You may feel you need to go to rehab, or AA or another recovery method. There's plenty of information online. SR is a great support too.
Speaking just for myself, it's been a huge load off my mind to just never drink, rather than constantly monitoring my intake and plotting how to get more without anyone noticing.
Then I did a lot of reading about alcohol, especially how bad it gets as time passes (it's progressive). You don't want to end up a final stage alcoholic, believe me.
You may feel you need to go to rehab, or AA or another recovery method. There's plenty of information online. SR is a great support too.
Speaking just for myself, it's been a huge load off my mind to just never drink, rather than constantly monitoring my intake and plotting how to get more without anyone noticing.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: South Florida
Posts: 29
I thank you for your time and support. I took the day off today to evaluate my life and priorities. I am still dehydrated from yesterday and shaky. Are there stages in alcoholism? Where do I stand ?
Are there stages in recovery? How do I measure progress
Are there stages in recovery? How do I measure progress
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Hello, and welcome.
I only know why I couldn't quit, and that was because I am an alcoholic. I was addicted to alcohol.
In the end it consumed my life. I tried quitting many, many times. Complete with solemn oaths, pouring it out and a scary withdrawal. But in no time I was back at it full swing.
I was drinking practically suicidialy. I didn't care, I had lost control.
It took going to AA for me. There I found other people like me who had sobriety of different lengths. I came here and read a lot.
I now have over three years sober. And to me it's a miracle. I was a falling down, knee walking drunk. Seemingly hopeless.
I now have a new life of sober, wonderful living. I've been given a second chance.
You can quit, too. Stick around here and read and post. Go to an AA meeting. Do whatever it takes. I wish you the best.
I only know why I couldn't quit, and that was because I am an alcoholic. I was addicted to alcohol.
In the end it consumed my life. I tried quitting many, many times. Complete with solemn oaths, pouring it out and a scary withdrawal. But in no time I was back at it full swing.
I was drinking practically suicidialy. I didn't care, I had lost control.
It took going to AA for me. There I found other people like me who had sobriety of different lengths. I came here and read a lot.
I now have over three years sober. And to me it's a miracle. I was a falling down, knee walking drunk. Seemingly hopeless.
I now have a new life of sober, wonderful living. I've been given a second chance.
You can quit, too. Stick around here and read and post. Go to an AA meeting. Do whatever it takes. I wish you the best.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: South Shore, MA
Posts: 348
Hi hAnita, for me progress is not drinking. not drinking beings about a host of other things for me to deal with and learning to process them
In a healthy manner helps me from drinking. I am learning to deal with stuffed pain and a high level of stress with a professional. I too have kids, it looks like we live a really good life, but inside my doors there is a lot of pain. Hang in and welcome.
In a healthy manner helps me from drinking. I am learning to deal with stuffed pain and a high level of stress with a professional. I too have kids, it looks like we live a really good life, but inside my doors there is a lot of pain. Hang in and welcome.
Left the bottle behind 4/16/2015
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: NC
Posts: 1,416
Hi, and welcome! Your story sounds a lot like mine. I drank for most of the past 26 years. I did have numerous periods of quitting, most ranging from a few weeks to a few months. There was one 2-year period I was sober because my wife at the time (we're now divorced) found my hidden bottle and threatened to take our child and leave me if I drank again. That scared me sober for a while, but it will never last if it isn't for you. You've come to the right place for help. There is just about all the advice and support you could ever need at SR, aside from that which you could get from your doctor.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: South Florida
Posts: 29
Originally Posted by GetMeOut 
Hi, and welcome! Your story sounds a lot like mine. I drank for most of the past 26 years. I did have numerous periods of quitting, most ranging from a few weeks to a few months. There was one 2-year period I was sober because my wife at the time (we're now divorced) found my hidden bottle and threatened to take our child and leave me if I drank again. That scared me sober for a while, but it will never last if it isn't for you. You've come to the right place for help. There is just about all the advice and support you could ever need at SR, aside from that which you could get from your doctor.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
Welcome to SR, hanita.
I was pretty much in your shoes 9 months ago.
As a matter of fact I work in kind of the same career as you.
Good for you to make the decision to stop.
It can get really rough the first week,but,it's well worth it.
Use this site as a tool. Visit here often if you get some cravings.
I know I visited here a lot and still do. It has helped me a lot.
You can do this. And when you do that fog and anxiety will leave.
And you'll be a much better man for it.
I was pretty much in your shoes 9 months ago.
As a matter of fact I work in kind of the same career as you.
Good for you to make the decision to stop.
It can get really rough the first week,but,it's well worth it.
Use this site as a tool. Visit here often if you get some cravings.
I know I visited here a lot and still do. It has helped me a lot.
You can do this. And when you do that fog and anxiety will leave.
And you'll be a much better man for it.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
Welcome hanita, I hope you have not been awake since last night.
Of course you don't have a plan. Kennedy didn't have a plan when he said we were going to the moon. He made it a goal. So now, what is YOUR goal? Obviously you have come to realize you cannot beat alcohol on your own. If you add up all the times the people here have quit it's probably in the billions compared to your million. You have to realize you need to make a commitment to yourself that you can never have another drink as long as you live. It's the only way for people like us. I see myself in you in many ways. Without going into detail, your drinking is not a shock and is not unfamiliar with us here on SR.
Do you live in the states? How big is your company? What Kind of health insurance, do you have an employee assistance program etc. ? Will your employer support you? Can you take medical leave to enter a rehab facility? Without knowing all of these variables and your options I couldn't recommend a plan for you.
Your immediate plan should be to put down the drink, and enlist your wife as an ally. I would contact a doctor/alcohol specialist and tell them your drinking history and ask for an opinion on whether you can do this alone or if you will need medical assistance.
Tell your employer you need help - again I don't know your situation.
Try to find an AA meeting close to you. Ask for help there. Do not be afraid or embarrassed to go. Do not worry about what they will think of you. You don't have to do anything but show up, look lost and ask for help.
I highly recommend to get into an alcohol rehab facility if it's possible. Plan to spend a month away from the family getting healed and educated on this insidious problem.
Getting healed is not the same as getting cured. Getting 'cured' is a lifelong endeavor. I don't wish to start a debate with others here. Your immediate goal is to get educated on your options, stop drinking and work on a plan to stay stopped. Once you assess your options, then you can put a concrete plan into action. There are various methods available to carry this forward. AA, SMART, AVRT etc. Don't focus too much on what they all are right now. Try an AA meeting first just to get some base level knowledge of your problem. Study the options later. Log onto to this site everyday and share your feelings and ask questions. You have come across a great source of support and understanding of your situation.
I hope this helped. I wish you luck and success.
Trust that you are not alone.
Brian
Of course you don't have a plan. Kennedy didn't have a plan when he said we were going to the moon. He made it a goal. So now, what is YOUR goal? Obviously you have come to realize you cannot beat alcohol on your own. If you add up all the times the people here have quit it's probably in the billions compared to your million. You have to realize you need to make a commitment to yourself that you can never have another drink as long as you live. It's the only way for people like us. I see myself in you in many ways. Without going into detail, your drinking is not a shock and is not unfamiliar with us here on SR.
Do you live in the states? How big is your company? What Kind of health insurance, do you have an employee assistance program etc. ? Will your employer support you? Can you take medical leave to enter a rehab facility? Without knowing all of these variables and your options I couldn't recommend a plan for you.
Your immediate plan should be to put down the drink, and enlist your wife as an ally. I would contact a doctor/alcohol specialist and tell them your drinking history and ask for an opinion on whether you can do this alone or if you will need medical assistance.
Tell your employer you need help - again I don't know your situation.
Try to find an AA meeting close to you. Ask for help there. Do not be afraid or embarrassed to go. Do not worry about what they will think of you. You don't have to do anything but show up, look lost and ask for help.
I highly recommend to get into an alcohol rehab facility if it's possible. Plan to spend a month away from the family getting healed and educated on this insidious problem.
Getting healed is not the same as getting cured. Getting 'cured' is a lifelong endeavor. I don't wish to start a debate with others here. Your immediate goal is to get educated on your options, stop drinking and work on a plan to stay stopped. Once you assess your options, then you can put a concrete plan into action. There are various methods available to carry this forward. AA, SMART, AVRT etc. Don't focus too much on what they all are right now. Try an AA meeting first just to get some base level knowledge of your problem. Study the options later. Log onto to this site everyday and share your feelings and ask questions. You have come across a great source of support and understanding of your situation.
I hope this helped. I wish you luck and success.
Trust that you are not alone.
Brian
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Originally Posted by hanita2809
Are there stages in alcoholism? Where do I stand ?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: South Florida
Posts: 29
Brian -
Thanks for your post. I am a french expat that do live in the US, South Florida. I have to check the coverage of my plan to see if it supports rehab. I made an appointment with the doctor for next week to help me through this Its interesting you told me to get my wife as an ally. I tried this morning but it didnt work. She was sick of me. She dont think of this as a disease (and frankly neither did I till this morning). She hates me for doing what I did. I promised her several times that I quit forever. I dont know how to convince her this time it is different.
Thanks for your post. I am a french expat that do live in the US, South Florida. I have to check the coverage of my plan to see if it supports rehab. I made an appointment with the doctor for next week to help me through this Its interesting you told me to get my wife as an ally. I tried this morning but it didnt work. She was sick of me. She dont think of this as a disease (and frankly neither did I till this morning). She hates me for doing what I did. I promised her several times that I quit forever. I dont know how to convince her this time it is different.
Originally Posted by LBrain
Welcome hanita, I hope you have not been awake since last night.
Of course you don't have a plan. Kennedy didn't have a plan when he said we were going to the moon. He made it a goal. So now, what is YOUR goal? Obviously you have come to realize you cannot beat alcohol on your own. If you add up all the times the people here have quit it's probably in the billions compared to your million. You have to realize you need to make a commitment to yourself that you can never have another drink as long as you live. It's the only way for people like us. I see myself in you in many ways. Without going into detail, your drinking is not a shock and is not unfamiliar with us here on SR.
Do you live in the states? How big is your company? What Kind of health insurance, do you have an employee assistance program etc. ? Will your employer support you? Can you take medical leave to enter a rehab facility? Without knowing all of these variables and your options I couldn't recommend a plan for you.
Your immediate plan should be to put down the drink, and enlist your wife as an ally. I would contact a doctor/alcohol specialist and tell them your drinking history and ask for an opinion on whether you can do this alone or if you will need medical assistance.
Tell your employer you need help - again I don't know your situation.
Try to find an AA meeting close to you. Ask for help there. Do not be afraid or embarrassed to go. Do not worry about what they will think of you. You don't have to do anything but show up, look lost and ask for help.
I highly recommend to get into an alcohol rehab facility if it's possible. Plan to spend a month away from the family getting healed and educated on this insidious problem.
Getting healed is not the same as getting cured. Getting 'cured' is a lifelong endeavor. I don't wish to start a debate with others here. Your immediate goal is to get educated on your options, stop drinking and work on a plan to stay stopped. Once you assess your options, then you can put a concrete plan into action. There are various methods available to carry this forward. AA, SMART, AVRT etc. Don't focus too much on what they all are right now. Try an AA meeting first just to get some base level knowledge of your problem. Study the options later. Log onto to this site everyday and share your feelings and ask questions. You have come across a great source of support and understanding of your situation.
I hope this helped. I wish you luck and success.
Trust that you are not alone.
Brian
Of course you don't have a plan. Kennedy didn't have a plan when he said we were going to the moon. He made it a goal. So now, what is YOUR goal? Obviously you have come to realize you cannot beat alcohol on your own. If you add up all the times the people here have quit it's probably in the billions compared to your million. You have to realize you need to make a commitment to yourself that you can never have another drink as long as you live. It's the only way for people like us. I see myself in you in many ways. Without going into detail, your drinking is not a shock and is not unfamiliar with us here on SR.
Do you live in the states? How big is your company? What Kind of health insurance, do you have an employee assistance program etc. ? Will your employer support you? Can you take medical leave to enter a rehab facility? Without knowing all of these variables and your options I couldn't recommend a plan for you.
Your immediate plan should be to put down the drink, and enlist your wife as an ally. I would contact a doctor/alcohol specialist and tell them your drinking history and ask for an opinion on whether you can do this alone or if you will need medical assistance.
Tell your employer you need help - again I don't know your situation.
Try to find an AA meeting close to you. Ask for help there. Do not be afraid or embarrassed to go. Do not worry about what they will think of you. You don't have to do anything but show up, look lost and ask for help.
I highly recommend to get into an alcohol rehab facility if it's possible. Plan to spend a month away from the family getting healed and educated on this insidious problem.
Getting healed is not the same as getting cured. Getting 'cured' is a lifelong endeavor. I don't wish to start a debate with others here. Your immediate goal is to get educated on your options, stop drinking and work on a plan to stay stopped. Once you assess your options, then you can put a concrete plan into action. There are various methods available to carry this forward. AA, SMART, AVRT etc. Don't focus too much on what they all are right now. Try an AA meeting first just to get some base level knowledge of your problem. Study the options later. Log onto to this site everyday and share your feelings and ask questions. You have come across a great source of support and understanding of your situation.
I hope this helped. I wish you luck and success.
Trust that you are not alone.
Brian
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,683
Hi Hanita and welcome to SR, lots of help for you here with like minded people .
When I first stopped drinking I had a million questions running around in my head but I found, for me, small baby steps, one day at a time did help.
All the best.
When I first stopped drinking I had a million questions running around in my head but I found, for me, small baby steps, one day at a time did help.
All the best.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 1,730
All I know is this, Hanita - You came to the right place. You will find a wealth of support and good advice here at SR. Read, post, ask questions. Go to the chat rooms.
This place has been my main resource for recovery. For me at least it has worked.
Good luck. I am glad you are here with us.
This place has been my main resource for recovery. For me at least it has worked.
Good luck. I am glad you are here with us.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
