Laura567

It was a in the middle of the day. Interesting experience, friendly people but all of the had quite a lot of sobriety already. Felt it hard to relate to them, almost made me feel like I don't have such a big problem. Never slept in a dumpster or took other drugd. I however realize I am heading for worse if I don't quit. Might go back though, or try another meeting, was a good experience to be able to talk about alcohol without being judged. Need to process it a bit also...just came from there and my mind is all over the place.

Climber122

Good for you Laura. I have gone to meetings for years and I too have struggled at times with finding myself picking at the people in the meetings from time to time. But as you evaluate the usefulness of AA, keep in mind that your addiction is always working against you - "it" wants you to quit anything that doesn't feed it. As such there will be a tendency - even among those of use with some sober time - to see what's "wrong" with something rather than looking for what is useful and/or good. We tend to be able to rationalize things in any direction we want to to suit our purposes. If it feels "wrong" that's okay - the patterns that have felt "right" to you end in drinking right? Going in a new direction will feel odd no doubt, but you're doing the right thing. Take what is useful for you and leave the rest.

Persys

My advice is to keep trying different meetings. Eventually you will find one where you feel right.

eaglesa1a

Good for you Laura! Sometimes it does take a little while to find the right meeting for you, but there are so many choices, there is one there. As they always say-"Keep coming back" Glad you're here with us.

SoberLeigh

Kudos, Laura; glad you went to a meeting.

Glad, too, that you realize that alcoholism is a progressive disease and it only heads downward. I played the "Game of Comparison" for too long before I realized it was a dangerous game and one I wasn't winning; alcoholism was taking me all the while I was playing.

Upward2Enlightenment

Keep trying different meetings, hopefully you will find one that is a perfect fit. Also they may have a lot of sobriety but they all had to start so they have been where you are. Most importantly stay sober, you don't want it to get so bad that one day you wake up in a dumpster or find yourself taking drugs.

Good luck.

Anna

I'm glad you're working on your recovery.

letsgowithJ

I definitely had a similar experience way back when. I think AA is awesome if that's how you quit, and also there's plenty or people who cannot quit any other way. But I also think that however one quits is the best method possible.

The main thing I had to deal with is that not connecting at AA does not mean that you can create some loophole to keep alcohol in your life.

Some context. I decided that I for real had to sober up when I fell asleep on my good friends couch watching the KC/Colts game. I missed Andrew Lucks comeback and thought KC had won. I mean, did you see the highlights?

Prior to that I'd danced with people I probably shouldn't had, texted weird text messages, slept on the floor of my (nice) house and the like...forgivable things to me. But I've never slept in a dumpster, cheated, called my wife a bad name (not once), or even driven drunk (I used to live in NY and now live in DC so its easy with public transit).

I dunno, I guess what I'm saying is: AA isn't the only way...just make sure that not connecting to AA isn't an excuse to stop trying to stay sober. Not that you're doing that. Just watch out for that, cuz I did that.

Laura567

letsgowithJ, you are very right, I already think about moderation...after 3 days sober. Going out running in a while, maybe it helps.

Upward2Enlightenment

Don't try it Laura, moderation won't work. Even if it works at first soon you will be back to where you were before.

Libertas

I had a similar experience with AA but didn't check out other groups. It was indeed a pretty interesting cross-section of society; as a whole I thought it wasn't a group that I could mesh with very well though. AA isn't for everyone but I will say this: during my consistent attendance I was sober. I recall a pretty rough-hewn guy saying in an open-discussion meeting that "any time I'm angry and feel like having a drink, I come to a meeting". If I had adhered to that mindset I would've stayed sober over the past year. The adages of 'keep coming back' and 'one day at a time' IMO are pretty effective; I laud you for taking that step---it's not an easy one at all. Keep moving forward!

T.

Mountainmanbob

The new comer is the most important person at the meeting. Us ones with a little time need to remember how it was in the beginning.

And our wish is that if we can help just one.

MM

LBrain

Hi Laura, I just want to say, don't let the 'I'm not as bad as them' feeling give you a false sense of security. I felt (and still do) the same way when I went to meetings. Do not compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to YOU. What do you want and what do you need from this. If it is sobriety, keep going. Try not to look for differences, look for similarities. You'll find them I'm sure.

CAPTAINZING2000

Consider your self fortunate you were smart enough to address your alcohol problem before you were sleeping in dumpsters.
Alcoholism leaves many people lying bleeding in gutters believing they don't even have a problem.

The drinking will get progressively worse unless, you take the necessary steps to stop now.