Just Realized Something, Probably Silly
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
Just Realized Something, Probably Silly
Do you remember when you first starting dating your A? They were attentive, sweet, affectionate, giving?
It feels like forever ago that mine was like that. The only reason I'm even thinking about it is because I wore a dress today to work (just a simple, old navy dress I bought for $10), and I've gotten compliments all day! While on my lunch break, as clients come in the office, etc. and it made me realize that my ABF never does that anymore. If I am ever "dressed up" and he happens to notice, he always accuses me of cheating on him. How did I not realize sooner that that sweet guy I was dating at first left? When did he leave? I guess as soon as I started trying to control his drinking.
Now we don't touch, we can't talk it only leads into an argument, I can't ask for help with anything since I "don't pay rent." How do we let ourselves become trapped in this? I will be so glad to leave. My heart aches for happiness, I hope one day I, and all of you, will find it.
It feels like forever ago that mine was like that. The only reason I'm even thinking about it is because I wore a dress today to work (just a simple, old navy dress I bought for $10), and I've gotten compliments all day! While on my lunch break, as clients come in the office, etc. and it made me realize that my ABF never does that anymore. If I am ever "dressed up" and he happens to notice, he always accuses me of cheating on him. How did I not realize sooner that that sweet guy I was dating at first left? When did he leave? I guess as soon as I started trying to control his drinking.
Now we don't touch, we can't talk it only leads into an argument, I can't ask for help with anything since I "don't pay rent." How do we let ourselves become trapped in this? I will be so glad to leave. My heart aches for happiness, I hope one day I, and all of you, will find it.
Stoic
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Wash D.C.
Posts: 321
That might be a (to a lesser extent) natural part of being with someone for a long time, and not exclusive to an A.
After the "honeymoon" phase wears off, couples forget to let the other one know how much they still care by not doing the little things we do in every day life that we perhaps used to. We take the other person for granted, essentially.
I'll go out on a limb here and say it's more often the male that is the perpetrator.
This is not to say that all relationships are this way...I'm sure there are a few out there where the "spark" is present throughout the years. The lucky ones!
After the "honeymoon" phase wears off, couples forget to let the other one know how much they still care by not doing the little things we do in every day life that we perhaps used to. We take the other person for granted, essentially.
I'll go out on a limb here and say it's more often the male that is the perpetrator.
This is not to say that all relationships are this way...I'm sure there are a few out there where the "spark" is present throughout the years. The lucky ones!
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
Originally Posted by Refiner 
When are you leaving him? Does he know it yet? What's causing you to stay with a jerk?
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