Brokenwill

I've been doing roxy 30s for about 8 months, maybe a little more. I was up to 2 or 3 a day. A few weeks ago I got some suboxone and weened off them. Not the first time, but a week ago I got stabbed and was in the hospital for several days. They had me on 2 lortab 10s and 2 mg dilauded drip every 4 hours. And when they let me out Saturday I was prescribed 1 every 4 hours. I wake up in the middle of the night with cold sweats. Body aches. It's awful. I plan to quit tomorrow. I'm just so scared and depressed. I hate that this happened to me. All I want is to be sober. I have an 8 month old son and he needs me. I sometimes think of killing my self and it's not fair to him

Coldfusion

Welcome!

I'm sorry that you have had such a rough time. Many others here have been where you are, and this is a good place for support--it also occupies you in a good way.

Keep reading and posting!

FeelingGreat

Hi BW, all I can suggest is that you write down your reasons why you want to be sober, then seek as much support as you can from NA and anything else that's available. It may be more habit than the physical cravings so think about what you can do to break your old habits.

AdmimalBlueEyes

after seeing your post title " I don't think I can do this " I was going to be a smart ass and post , your probably right , then give you some encouregment , after reading your post I will skip the sarcasm,
First I want to adress your suicide part, I'm bipolar back when I still swung , when I was down and suicidal or hadnt taken my meds for a while I learned that those feelings were unfounded and unreal and always fleeting , I don't swing anymore , now I don't feel, I havnt taken meds for years, I'm indiferent to life and have no obligations, but you have a child , I'm sure you love your kid and vice versa , any pain your feeling is incomparable to what your child would feel from loosing you,
Also remember your depresion is being artificially augmented by your anxiety from quiting and your withdraw, I promise that feeling goes away, as will your aches, its gonna suck for a bit , no way around that , but as abe lincoln said " all of this will have come to pass" he was refering to the trials of the civil war, but it applies to all things, your pain is not permanent . good luck

KateL

Been thee and beleive me, if I can do it, anyone can xxxxx

yeahgr8

Get down to NA and get involved. The support wil be amazing and they have a solution there so you never get in this position again and can be a good mother to your child. The solution is the steps of NA btw, ask someone about it at a meeting:-)

Mountainmanbob

I have had a couple of friends commit suicide
one had twin (little boys)

never forget that your son needs you (right here always)

things will be ok once you are clean and sober

only -- look forward to that day

each day of our lives must be filled with good moral decisions
takes time -- but -- it does happen

MM

FeenixxRising

You can do it, Do you have any support? Have you tried NA?

Brokenwill

I have support from a friend and family. On of my friends is in a detox program for 6 weeks. He said he is going to take me to some na meetings this week.

Thank y'all so much for the support! I keep re reading those posts and there's a lot of truth behind ose words I can relate to. How long do the withdrawals last? Should I try to get some suboxone or just go cold turkey? Again thank all of you so much. Hopefully one day I can log on here free from my addiction and help others as you do.

Brokenwill

I took a quarter of a zubsolv this morning and I have not taken pain mens all day. I've got 3 quarters left. Aside from my back, neck, and head aches I feel okay. My wounds sometimes hurt if I move wrong. I'm taking alka seltzer for the aches and am still taking the prescribed muscle relaxer (soma) although just 2 instead of the prescribed dose 3.

OpioPhobe

Broken - you can absolutely do this. You are doing it! It isn't an easy process, but it is worth every minute of pain to get through to the other side. Do you have a doctor you can consult? I can't imagine the tossing and turning is going to be good for that stab wound. Did they say you could take baths? Are you in any condition to exercise (even if it is just walking)?

Hevyn

Welcome Brokenwill - I'm glad you found us. I felt so much better when I could talk honestly here.

Can you get some advice from a doctor about withdrawing? We want you to be safe. I'm sorry for all you've been through - better days are ahead.

Hevyn

(Opio & I said the same thing about a doctor...but it is the safest thing.)

Anna

I would agree with the suggestion to talk to your dr. You have a wound that needs to heal aside from the detoxing, so medical advice would be a good idea.

I'm so glad that you plan to live a sober life.

least

Welcome to the family. I hope the support here can help you get clean for good.

Brokenwill

Why do y'all think I need to see a doctor? I have a follow up appointment for my wounds next Wednesday. I could talk to him about my problems if y'all think it is the best idea.

Dee74

It's good to get some qualified medical advice about detox Brokenwill.
Get as much support as you can - for you and your son

D

OpioPhobe

Broken - it is a stressful process on the body. I founds nights to be the roughest and there was a lot of flip flopping around on the bed. There were a lot of baths at night. There was a lot of sweating and insomnia. That doesn't seem like it would be good for a stab wound (e.g. reopening the wound, infection, etc). Only your doctor would know the details of your specific case, and only he/she would be able to give accurate advice on how big of a deal it is.

Brokenwill

Thanks op. I can't exactly toss and turn I'm only able to lay on my back. I'm just gonna try and make it through to daylight. I've got to find some way to get some exercise. I'm going crazy just sitting around watching movies all day. That's not me.