I'm new
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
I'm new
Hi, I stumbled upon this website on google. I'm 28 years old and have been an addict sense I was 13. I have had several earth shattering events take place back to back, although it is no excuse I feel like it is the depth of why I have the issues that I do. I have read a bit, and would like to read more. I won't post much right away, I'm kinda a loner and stick to my own thing. This is the first place where I have read anything similar to what I have been experiencing in my own mind. I have attended AA and NA and have been sober from hard chemical substances for 8 years now. My addiction shifted to drinking and I have been officially off beers and booze for 3 days now. I'm doing it myself, I feel ok I suppose. AA has not been successful because I really have a really personal and big issue with the higher power thing and also found a thread here I would like to read more into. When I made my account it suggested me to post here so I am leaving a short summary of my situation. Hello everyone and have a nice day/night.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
Welcome ST! This a wonderful site with a lot of support. I also haven't found AA as the right fit for me but you are right, there are alternatives which you can read about on this site. Best wishes on your journey, you are very brave x
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Thank you very much. I can already feel that this will help me in my battle. I'm happy I used the programs enough to get away from drugs but AA leaves me failing every time. I was always a mental explorer as well. I'm very deep in my head and love thinking about my mind and mental health. I'm actually excited to read all of the various topics and threads that are here. I have a smartphone so I can come back here 24/7. I'm at the tail end the finish line is in sight. Just the damn beer keeps me failing over and over. My entire family is pretty bad actually. But I am also insanely different then the rest of my family as well. I just need to conquer this last part I guess...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Thank you! In the very near future when I have a bit more confidence and the proper time to sit down and type it out properly, I would like to share some of the things that happened to me as well as some of the things that I did to overcome them. One of my biggest non booze related problems is that I am way to hard on myself. I beat myself up and don't give myself enough credit like for anything. I read a thread on "irrational thinking" and want to dive deeper into that world in my mind. It's time to stop beating myself up and move on. I'm so happy to be clean from the heavy stuff and haven't wanted anything more then to stay away from beer. I'm thankful as well that I stayed away from hard liqueur as well. I have a deep mind and all my close friends and family almost can't keep up with my thoughts and feelings. I have control over them but it's still "too much" for people, or I get ok'd to death and told that everything will be ok, and that I should go to AA which frustrates me! Thank you for listening <3
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,564
Hello Solitary. I'm really glad you found us and reached out for some help.
When I joined here it meant so much to have people to talk to who really understood. No one in my life had any idea what I was going through. I hope it helps ease your anxiety to know you're in good company. You can do this!
When I joined here it meant so much to have people to talk to who really understood. No one in my life had any idea what I was going through. I hope it helps ease your anxiety to know you're in good company. You can do this!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
I'm doing ok, but my girlfriend thinks I'm a complete ******* for the last three days it's really discouraging. It makes me think that I might just be better drinking honestly...
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,067
Originally Posted by SolitaryThinker 
It makes me think that I might just be better drinking honestly...
Try to explain to your girlfriend what is going on, and that it will be best for both of you in the long run.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Like she just left after another argument for the 4th night in a row and I haven't had a drink in 4 days, I clearly see the pattern but now I'm upset again, hence why I'm on here instead of my Facebook account...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
I was over 20 beers a day and I'm shaking like crazy, my stomach is still on a roller coaster and I feel like I have an elephant standing on my head, I'm sorry I'm not in the greatest of moods 8(
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