Mimij

Hi my husband drinks and he does not understand why I don't want to go to the usual restaurants with fancy cockails that we used to frequent. I can't drink at all for health reasons right now. I am not really sure I am an alcoholic but I have not had a drink in 1.5 years and if I ever drink again it wont be at least for another year and it will have to be only occasional as alcohol and sugar and diet damaged my GI tract and now I am healing from that.

Please does anyone have any advice or reading I can give him? He gets mad when I tell him I dont want to go to these places or go out with others for a "drink".

Thanks!

matt4x4

You can try AA and Alanon. Sounds to me like he is an alcoholic, but who am I to judge, only he can be the judge. This type of relationship is typical of a "co-dependant, enabler" type deal. Its a game between the both of you. And both sides are just as sick. The "problem drinker" and their spouse.

Welcome, wish you the best.

ReadyAtLast

If he is getting mad because you don't want to go to drinking places then I think you need to seriously re-assess your relationship. you're 1,5years sober so this is not a new thing or something your relationship has adjusted to. A man who respects and loves you will not get mad because you don't want to do something that wil harm your health.

Mimij

Sorry maybe I need to explain more. I do think my husband is an alcoholic but of course he does not. He doesn't think I should drink he just wants me to join him when he goes for drinks with friends. He wants us to have dinner parties where of course alcohol would be served since he and others drink. We already do have family meals several times per month where he and all my relatives drink. He likes to go to restaurants that remind me of my drinking days. These restaurants of course have good food too. Don't recovering alcoholics go out to dinner? I do and I just don't enjoy it as much as I used to and I don't know what to do and he doesn't understand why I don't want to join him with friends that are drinking . He just figures I don't have to drink so what is the big deal? This is his perspective