yet again!
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 245
yet again!
Well, today is my day 1 again, and I just realized that last April, April 30th, to be exact, was when I went to detox because I was drinking about 4 bottles of wine a day. Came out May 2nd and had 6 weeks of sobriety under my belt before I messed up and slowly started all over again. So I drank the last of my wine last night and hopefully can make it through without going back to detox. Can't afford the co-insurance. Still haven't paid the $900.00 I owe from last year, which I could easily have done with my wine money if I hadn't started drinking again. My body is in way worse shape than it was last year, gained a lot of weight, my live in bf moved out, had to get a roommate, a crappy small apartment, and have to junk my car and ride my bike because it's not worth fixing and I couldn't afford it if it was. If I had all the money I've wasted on wine the past year I'd be in a much better situation. This time I'm going to try a lot harder, and get back on my diet, which doesn't allow any drinking. Riding my bike to work will help also, I think. When I was in detox and everyone else in there was not a first timer, I couldn't imagine how anyone could go through that ordeal more than once. Well, now I understand.
When I was in detox/rehab I couldn't believe the number of 5th, 6th, 7th, and one guy was on number 10. What an eye opener.
sux donnit? hope you have the mind to make it right this time.
Starting over can be brutal. Many have succeeded.
Welcome.
sux donnit? hope you have the mind to make it right this time.
Starting over can be brutal. Many have succeeded.
Welcome.
Hi scintillady. Glad to hear that you are going to try again. You mentioned going to detox last year; did you work any kind of a program after detox? I am wondering if you need to change things up a bit this time.
Welcome back Scintillady. I'd also ask what your plans are for "trying harder" this time around. Going back through your posts for the past several months it seems that you are mainly just trying to do this on your own. Have you tried any local support groups such as AA, Smart, LifeRing. etc? They are all free and filled with people just like yourself that have only one goal - to quit drinking. Same with us here at SR.
Welcome back scintillady
Trying harder is a good principle to go by, but do give some thought to what you're actually trying harder at.
Trying at harder at strategies that have let you down in the past is really not something you want to devote energy to again.
Think about things you haven;t tried, or different approaches. Really give it all you've got, and I'm sure you can wrest a different outcome from all hard work
any ideas on what you might do differently this time?
D.
Trying harder is a good principle to go by, but do give some thought to what you're actually trying harder at.
Trying at harder at strategies that have let you down in the past is really not something you want to devote energy to again.
Think about things you haven;t tried, or different approaches. Really give it all you've got, and I'm sure you can wrest a different outcome from all hard work
any ideas on what you might do differently this time?
D.
That's really good advice. I'm on my second attempt and I'm trying to draw on what went right last time, but to stay away from the choices I made which undermined that. It's also very easy to be hard on yourself if you slip. I certainly was - I felt I'd let myself down and spent more time focusing on "I can't do this", rather than, "You managed to do it once and you can do it again, armed with a better understanding of what it takes to keep doing it".
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