Mrrryah1

The guilt and shame that I'm feeling from constantly relapsing, and from trying to stay sober and failing over and over, honestly feels like it's going to drive me insane before drinking will. I can't keep "coming back" and feeling judged by the recovery people in my city. Can't keep trying and failing and hating myself for failing. Just can't. I'm not desperate enough to stay sober for the long haul obviously, so there's no point in trying until something shifts inside of me. So I dunno if this is goodbye to SR..... Probably more of a "c u later". Thanks for everything.

Goldcoastgirl

I'm really sorry to hear that. I think most of us are going through the ups and downs of being sober and failing. You are only human but don't beat yourself up too much. Keep coming back here even if you don't want to post and see that you are not alone. Much love x

LadyinBC

Well I am certainly not judging you.

If you don't want to post at least keep reading and coming here anyways. Please don't give up hope. We will all be here when you are ready .

SoberLeigh

Mrrryah - I hope that you change your mind and stay with SR and with attempts at sobriety. Do you think that you can give it just one more try?

Above all, I hope you know that we are behind you wherever you go and will be here for you.

Dee74

Guilt and shame are no reasons to leave SR Mrryah

Everyone one of us here has been where you've been.
SR exists to help people like you, people who are struggling, to change their lives for good.

Leaving SR just abandons you to the drinking life and all the horrors and catastrophes that brings.

Some people say c u later, but never make it back. Don't be one of them

Stay.

You can do this.

D

abetterlife45

Don't give up if you really want it! I was just getting on SR to talk about the relapse I had yesterday. At the time, I really wanted to drink and didnt care what anyone thought. Today I feel like crap! I knew I would. I've had several relapses, but I've noticed that I get a little further along each time. I also feel so good when I'm sober. What tools are you using to help you along the way? I know AA isn't for everyone, but it's made a huge difference for me. I think what happened to me yesterday is that I haven't been working the program very hard.

Don't beat yourself up and try not to let what other people think keep you from trying again. It's hard to come back. I know! But it is worth it.

SoberKyGirl

I too hate to hear this. Like I said in another post. Those folks in AA are all there for the same reason...to get sober / to stay sober / to learn to be sober. Please keep going back....don't let this disease talk to you. Hush it up with meetings, prayers, and spend time with folks that don't drink in your family....even if you have to hang out with the kids...lol. Bless you!

FreeOwl

I hope you'll keep checking in here, at the very least.

I can understand how you might feel a little like each time is just worse than the last and feel discouraged and hopeless at times as efforts at recovery get derailed.

I've sure seen that in others and I've felt it myself a little.... though honestly I'm really only on my second LEGIT and committed path of sobriety.

I hope that you DON'T simply give up on recovery, because if you're caught enough in the cycle of addiction to be posting what you did, my sense is that you're heading for a lot more harm than the feelings you're dealing with now if you just give up.

How about you check back in here tomorrow and see if - just for tomorrow - maybe you'd like to stay sober.

We'll be here.

GreenEggsAndHam

I feel like giving up too.

I've relapsed so many times it's embarrassing. Each time I'm sure I have this for certain. Maybe take some time to really remember why you want sobriety. That's what I'm having to do and it's keeping me sober for now.

Good luck - we are always here no matter what.

Jaye

Mrrryah1, we are all only human. No judgement here. Many of us have "failed" or relapsed over and over - I know I have. The guilt and shame are hard to deal with, I know. We all know and understand what you mean. But don't give up. You can fall many times, but you have to keep getting back up again. Easy to say, I know. Not so easy to do. Even if you do not post here, please keep reading. There are some inspirational people here, with hope and wisdom to offer. I hope you stick around.

Jaye

LBrain

Yeah, I'm sure it's tough when the crowd gets down on you.

Just be mindful. Sometimes it's too late to realize it's too late.

Stick around here. I'm sure nobody here is going to judge you - I certainly do not. So you have no fear of judgement or the guilt and shame you may feel - whether self-imposed or not.

Give yourself a chance. It aint over till it's over. And it certainly aint over yet.

doggonecarl

I am not sure you've been sober long enough to know what you are recovering for...so it's easy to fall back into drinking. You want to feel that "shift" inside? Go three months without drinking while you focus on your recovery.

LSC1

Mrrryah
You are always welcome in chat ... hope to see you back in there.

Raider

Don't go!!! I relapsed a bunch if times. I think most have. Please stay and post. You may really help someone on here. You never know where your light will shine. Blessings.

calico

Please don't give up. There is no reason for shame or embarrassment, as you are among those who understand how hard it is to quit. If you don't feel like posting for a while, at least keep coming and reading, and know you are always welcome back any time. I never got to a truly 'desperate' point either, but I lost so much time I can never have back.

I wish you all the best.

calico

LadyBlue0527

Mrrryah please don't turn away because you're afraid of what other people think. I may be having the longest stint of sobriety I've ever had but it took a lot of attempts to get here. This is one of, if not the hardest thing you'll ever do. Please don't ever give up. You are worth and you deserve a better life!

Justadude

Mrrryah,

Like everyone says, We have all relapsed and fight it daily. I haven't been a member long but have been reading for a about a year, maybe a little more. I know no one here judges for slipping. I don't know what your belief system is but I will be doing everything within mine for you. Hugs, positive thoughts and prayers.


“Certain thoughts are prayers. There are moments when, whatever be the attitude of the body, the soul is on its knees.”
― Victor Hugo

ScottFromWI

Keep trying Myrrah, it gets better. You are always welcome here and leaving your support group is a mistake you will regret. I don't mean that in a harsh way, it's simply the truth for any of us. I hope you decide to stay on SR.

Maestro

"No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again." --Buddha

huntingtontx

I hope you stay. So what if you have to start over, at least it is a start. No one can judge you, they have never walked in your shoes. We are all here for you.