matt4x4

You are either on step 2, or you are on step 4.
Step 3 is just a decision to go on with the rest of the steps. Without action, the decision is just a thought. I had many thoughts when I was drinking, but made no actions based on a decision. Grand plans, Grand Schemes never panned out. Was too busy drinking, dreaming.

dSober

I respectfully disagree. I felt I was stuck on Step 3 for years. While I did, and do, believe a Power greater than myself could restore me to sanity, as a long time agnostic I couldn't quite put my finger on who/what that power was, therefore I couldn't make the required decision. I believe I only recently found that Power and made that decision. Odd thing though, once I did, I realized I wasn't really stuck. Upon reviewing the other steps, just a few days ago, I realized I'd been working them, to one extent or another, all along. I believe keeping AA and the steps in the back of my mind, at least, all this time, made this possible.

dSober

Upon reflection on what I just typed in the last post, maybe I should change "disagree" to "agree", not sure, lol.

greenteababe

i prayed a lot before any kind of higher power seemed kind of possible:\

Music

My first sponsor asked me one day about step 3. I said I wasn't sure about that step so he suggested I go back to step 2. Apparently, I hadn't really come to believe in a power greater than myself who could restore me to sanity. The whole reason for step 3 is to be able to pray the 3rd step prayer with someone else so I can move on to step 4 WITH that power...God, who can help on my way to restoring myself to some sort of sanity....not the crazy kind of sanity but the kind of sanity that doesn't drive me to drink just 'cause it's Tuesday, or 'cause the dog died. So, I agree with the idea that I can't get stuck on step 3. I either go back, or proceed onward and upward.

mfanch

Step 3 was a decision for me to work the rest of the steps. In the 12n12 it says at the end of step 6 is the "exact point at which we abandon limited objectives, and move towards God's will for us." (step 3)

I was relieved when I learned that all I had to do was take the action to move foward (4-9), and the thinking would follow. And in fact, when I got to 6/7, I noticed I was actually DOING step 3.

Darwinia

Steps 2 and 3 are not easy for an atheist. I feel as if I am going to be stuck in step 1 forever.

mfanch

I am a non-theist. I have a higher power I call "not me". In Step2 I asked for outside help (the group/AA) and in Step3 I made a decision to work the rest of the steps.

I was defiant and angry in the beginning (militant atheist). BUT it didn't say I was going to find "god", it says I should seek and if I did, my life would get better. Oh boy has it. I have been sober for 7 years and my life is amazing.

I would tell my newcomer self: "mfanch, stop overthinking. There is nothing to figure out. Just take the actions, the thinking will follow."

My thinking is better. If there is a god, I would love some sky-writing or something, but I'm not going to hold my breath. In the meantime, I will practice the step in all my affairs and be happy (instead of chained to the bottle).

stevieg46

For me Step 3 is more than a decision , after admitting /surrendering in Step 1 and realizing I could not manage my own life and that lack of power was my dilemma , I came to believe in Step 2 a power greater than myself (self is the problem ) Power/God is the solution . Remove me from the bondage of self , take away my (self) difficulties . Step 3 for me is when I made conscious contact with God of my understanding , faith and trust removed the fear and uncertainty and gave me the confidence to commence with Steps 4 &5 where I fearlessly shared with another human being the exact nature of my wrongs , dependence on God of my understanding carried me through the rest of the program all the time ''improving my conscious contact '' cleaned house in 8&9 , took Step 10 and realized in Step 11 that ''conscious contact ''can only be every minute every hour of everyday 24/7 , practicing in that manner really improved my contact and led to a Spiritual Awakening as the ''result of the steps '' conscious contact began in the 3rd Step. To me Step 3 is the ''key '' the rock on which my sobriety was built on , that needs action , it is more than a decision in my experience.

Regards Stevie recovered 12 03 2006

sugarbear1

step 2 is willingness

Willingness to:

set aside old beliefs

believe

believe working the rest of the steps might help you

stop insisting there is no higher power

Step 2 "came to believe," yes, but not until I got through step 7. It's not an immediate came to believe, it was gradual....and a result of working through to step 8, not from working on believing. Gee, that got me drunk more times than I can remember!

Then step 3 is a decision to move forward, knowing you are cared for and won't crumble while working the rest of the steps

4 is moral inventory (where I found my patterns of behaving)
5 is sharing that inventory and seeing our part (in our life)

6 is willingness to say a prayer, just try it
7 is a prayer that we move forward.....

I didn't believe in a higher power until after I got through the step 7 prayer and my obsession to drink/use left me.

Still not sure there is a god, but there is something wanting me alive and sober today.

spiritual experience? maybe. Lease on a new way to live (self-lessly, which I find utterly annoying at times and life still frustrates me, but through all the poop that has flown my way, I have yet to think about drinking to release it all).

too simple? maybe. It works for me and I am moving along through my 6th year of sobriety.

Gottalife

By some definitions I would still be wandering around in the athiest or agnostic camp today. I don't follow a religion, I only attend church for funerals and weddings.

This is how I approached step two. First I had a look at all the things I had tried in the past which I hoped would restore me to sanity. They are all human in nature - new job, new girlfriend, new town, counselling, will power, court order, asylum, swearing off etc etc. None of these had worked.

I was left with a last resort. AA. When I listened to them in a meeting, they mostly seemed to credit their recovery to the "god" of their understanding. And they looked in pretty good shape to me.

So when I looked at the second step, and the direction in the big book, I just needed to ask myself a simple question. Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that the same power that helped these folks could help me? Is it even remotely possible?

It didn't ask me to believe in God. May answer was yes I am willing provided I get some evidence along the way.

Had I answered no! I would have put myself in a bit of a spot. Being unwilling to pursue the AA suggested method of recovery, what else was left? I had a pretty extensive list of failed alternatives. Was it really rational to close my mind to the spiritual approach?

DayTrader

I've not found nor have I witnessed that to be true. It may "feel" that way but it won't likely BE that way for you.

If someone has taken the first step, they've admitted in their heart that they're alcoholic and can't manage their own life.

Once someone does that it seems to me they'd have 2 choices - continue to live as they have been under their own power and hope it turns out differently or look for another direction. Willing to believe they may be a better way = a beginning on step 2. Deciding to try that new direction = step 3.

The book is a little more blunt: live on a spiritual basis or die an alcoholic death.

IF one has taken the first step at depth, every single other step is a breeze. First step reservations / lurking notions that it's not true for you..... that's what leads to "problems" with the rest of the program.

The good news is you can't be stuck on step 1 forever. If you're a real alcoholic, you'll either begin to live on that spiritual basis or continue to die an alcoholic death. Staying stuck on a step isn't an option.

fini

in talking to a new sponsee and outlining the general approach and direction of the AA program, i asked what finally brought here here.
the one thing she's sure of, after decades of living with various out-of-control stuff, came out this way: "i cannot do this on my own!"

not stuck on step one.

january161992

i didnt do something i made a decision to do something

as a really simple dummy drunk i dont over think it

my will ... which is my thinking and my choices

my life ... which is my actions and what i actually do

thy will not mine be done

my conscience always lets me know when im doing the wrong thing

i do the best i can with whats in front of me and however that turns out is Gods will for me

its more about acceptance

dsmaxis10

yes i casn't pick a Religion i like em all pg 181 says One God your conception won't be found out until its time to find out