Back again....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 34
Back again....
Hi I was here last summer and did 28 days sober. I thought I could take on the world and didn't need this support group nonsense and could now drink healthily....in fact I was only on here for help while I quit for a temporary period of respite right?!
I know in the back of my mind I started again, because despite feeling amazing physically from no alcohol, I just couldn't imagine a life without it. However, 6 months later I can't say I have been living a great life? It's been full of awful hangovers, sick days and embarrassing moments. Plus sometimes when I drink I take cocaine and I really hate myself for that. I concluded my problem was cocaine and not alcohol, but of course one leads to the other and I universally never crave or give cocaine a second thought unless I have had a drink.
I do wonder what the hell society is doing? It feels a bit like the period before smoking became a major social no-go, in as much as everyone knew it was evil, but it was still so much a social norm. If alcohol could hurry up and get to where smoking is today, we could all step away without the social pressure I feel now.
Anyway, sorry to bore you all with the same story mark two, but here I am again, back for another go.
I know in the back of my mind I started again, because despite feeling amazing physically from no alcohol, I just couldn't imagine a life without it. However, 6 months later I can't say I have been living a great life? It's been full of awful hangovers, sick days and embarrassing moments. Plus sometimes when I drink I take cocaine and I really hate myself for that. I concluded my problem was cocaine and not alcohol, but of course one leads to the other and I universally never crave or give cocaine a second thought unless I have had a drink.
I do wonder what the hell society is doing? It feels a bit like the period before smoking became a major social no-go, in as much as everyone knew it was evil, but it was still so much a social norm. If alcohol could hurry up and get to where smoking is today, we could all step away without the social pressure I feel now.
Anyway, sorry to bore you all with the same story mark two, but here I am again, back for another go.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 970
Great to have you back ! You've got LOTS of company in the relapse dept. so don't feel bad. You've learnt some key things from that experience - now the key is NOT to forget them or let your AV lie to you again ! You don't have to believe those lies anymore because you know better now. Congratulations on returning !
Phoenix Rising Again
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 3,079
Welcome back! I hope you find something to make things stick this time.
I'm a bit confused by this: " I concluded my problem was cocaine and not alcohol, but of course one leads to the other and I universally never crave or give cocaine a second thought unless I have had a drink.
This seems a little backwards. How is cocaine the issue if you don't think about it until you drink?
I'm a bit confused by this: " I concluded my problem was cocaine and not alcohol, but of course one leads to the other and I universally never crave or give cocaine a second thought unless I have had a drink.
This seems a little backwards. How is cocaine the issue if you don't think about it until you drink?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 34
Hi Aarryckha. That should have said 'was not' cocaine rather than 'was'....it's definitely alcohol that's the problem for me and cocaine is just something that I can get if I want to sober up (and wish I didn't have access too).....so booze precedes.
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