What I was afraid of
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: PC
Posts: 148
What I was afraid of
Happened. 
. I joined 3 years ago knowing I had a serious alcohol problem. I was afraid that I would lose my boys and everything else. Well, that happened. I don't have them anymore as they are at their Moms all the time. I'm close, if not already due to my last bender, losing my job. My brain is a mess and I have few friends. I didn't maintain my connection here and other support networks. I have almost 6 days now and am so glad to be back. I know now that I have to stay sober. Of course I said that before. That's the baffling nature of this ****. My pattern is typically 2-3 months sober then my AV (read a lot about that the last few days on here) says it's ok you want/need a beer. After that all bets are off. Might end up in the hospital. Might lose days of remembering much at all.
Anyway, thanks for reading my abridged horror story and will be thankful of you're support.
. I joined 3 years ago knowing I had a serious alcohol problem. I was afraid that I would lose my boys and everything else. Well, that happened. I don't have them anymore as they are at their Moms all the time. I'm close, if not already due to my last bender, losing my job. My brain is a mess and I have few friends. I didn't maintain my connection here and other support networks. I have almost 6 days now and am so glad to be back. I know now that I have to stay sober. Of course I said that before. That's the baffling nature of this ****. My pattern is typically 2-3 months sober then my AV (read a lot about that the last few days on here) says it's ok you want/need a beer. After that all bets are off. Might end up in the hospital. Might lose days of remembering much at all. Anyway, thanks for reading my abridged horror story and will be thankful of you're support.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,036
Welcome back, simple!
I'm sorry the last few years have been such a struggle.
But it doesn't matter what's behind you -- it's where you are now that matters, and with six days and what sounds like gratitude in your post, I think you're doing great!
I'm sorry the last few years have been such a struggle.
But it doesn't matter what's behind you -- it's where you are now that matters, and with six days and what sounds like gratitude in your post, I think you're doing great!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,557
Welcome back simplenoteasy. I sympathize - you've been through a bad time. I turned my life into a nightmare too. You can still rise above the problems and have a great life. You now know where that beer will lead you - it can never be worth it. Keep reading and posting - you can do this. 
Sober Today
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 779
I think it's an easy trap to fall into after some time sober to think that you have it under control and can drink again. What sort of support are you lining up for yourself this time? I know based on endless attempts in the past that I need a lot of support.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi Simple and it's great that your trying again. When I first went to AA I was given a list of things that would happen to me if I continued to drink. Being an undisciplined alcoholic I thought it was a scare tactic and proceeded doing things my way until it became necessary for me to surrender to the fact that I could never again drink alcohol in safety and accept that fact every day. I still accept it and it hasn't been a desire for me for many years. It was simple but not easy during the first year but worth every bit of effort involved.
VE WELL
VE WELL
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Engerland
Posts: 897
Welcome back and total support here. My drinking pattern was much the same, and the gradual loss of almost everything was where i ended up. As you say, support, and lots of it, is vital to recovery. For so long i thought that this was something that i alone could fix. That proved to be my undoing many times.
Welcome to the tribe!
G
Welcome to the tribe!
G
AA member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: United Kingdom.
Posts: 3,007
Welcome back to SR.
Congratulations on your sober days.Alcoholism is relentlessly progressive it keeps on taking.
I found I couldn't stay sober when I tried to do it alone.Do you have some support?
Wishing you well.
Congratulations on your sober days.Alcoholism is relentlessly progressive it keeps on taking.
I found I couldn't stay sober when I tried to do it alone.Do you have some support?
Wishing you well.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: PC
Posts: 148
Thanks everyone for your welcome. It is good to be back. I am open to anything that will help me stay sober. I have a bit of an issue right now with going to AA as I am very stretched for time and it was put to me that I must do 90 meetings in 90 days. I hope I dont offend anyone but I just cant do that right now. I am exploring other options and working on a recovery plan. AA maybe the path but for now I have SR, family and friend.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
I am not in AA myself, but i understand 90 meetings in 90 days is not a requirement. Having said that, if you are truly ready to get sober is one hour of your day too much to sacrifice? Even if it's just spending an hour here each day would be of great benefit.
Getting sober is serious business and an every day job, especially in the beginning.
Getting sober is serious business and an every day job, especially in the beginning.
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