I always find my way to these websites
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Joisy
Posts: 7
I always find my way to these websites
Sorry if this is long. I have been smoking marijuana for 6 years now and have finally decided to accept or realize that it may indeed be a problem for me. It wasn't a problem until somewhere along the lines of my college career that it took a turn for the worse.
I've always felt paranoid about what people are thinking of me or how I look, but managed to "deal" with it by putting on a false face and now, smoking, which im just starting to realize. I think it was because I was bullied a lot for my weight as a kid. When I started smoking, I really enjoyed it at first. Typical laughing outbursts and coming up with so called great ideas. In college I tried acid and shrooms. Shrooms were a fun time. Acid not so much. After that terrible trip, for the first time in my life, my anxiety (I think it's anxiety) really kicked and I have been managing it the best I can ever since. I always believed that smoking couldn't possibly be bad. I was always for its legalization and believed it to be a helpful medicinal herb which I still believe, and is fine for some people in moderation. But not for me. My daily smoking has been leaving me feeling guilty and lately, I have been doubting myself and occasionally ending up here on forums like this at 2 in the morning.
So here I am. Making a post on a forum where I never though I had a place. Always telling myself that I was different from the rest of those who come here for help. That I don't need help and that it doesn't affect me. But then why do I keep ending up here.
I think I want to quit once and for all. I've taken breaks for a month or so. Never felt any better or worse. But I'm sick of how I feel. My thoughts feel cloudy and I doubt every choice I make. I have problems connecting with others and my one best friend from my hometown is a huge smoker. He's the only person I still talk to from high school. We hung out a lot and played games before we smoked, but now all i feel we do is smoke and couldn't imagine what being sober with him would be like. He supplies me too. I actually feel ****** now because im starting to realize that someone who I considered a really good friend is becoming someone who I think i'm just hanging out with because of weed.
I'm sorry for typos. I've never posted here before. I'm tired now. I wanted to throw out my paraphernalia and start right now but I have to wait till tomorrow. Im beginning to wonder ill just go back to my other typical "its fine" mindset after I sleep it off. If it really is a problem causing mechanism to my life (social connections, anxiety, stress, etc), I hope I can start to make the right choices.
I've always felt paranoid about what people are thinking of me or how I look, but managed to "deal" with it by putting on a false face and now, smoking, which im just starting to realize. I think it was because I was bullied a lot for my weight as a kid. When I started smoking, I really enjoyed it at first. Typical laughing outbursts and coming up with so called great ideas. In college I tried acid and shrooms. Shrooms were a fun time. Acid not so much. After that terrible trip, for the first time in my life, my anxiety (I think it's anxiety) really kicked and I have been managing it the best I can ever since. I always believed that smoking couldn't possibly be bad. I was always for its legalization and believed it to be a helpful medicinal herb which I still believe, and is fine for some people in moderation. But not for me. My daily smoking has been leaving me feeling guilty and lately, I have been doubting myself and occasionally ending up here on forums like this at 2 in the morning.
So here I am. Making a post on a forum where I never though I had a place. Always telling myself that I was different from the rest of those who come here for help. That I don't need help and that it doesn't affect me. But then why do I keep ending up here.
I think I want to quit once and for all. I've taken breaks for a month or so. Never felt any better or worse. But I'm sick of how I feel. My thoughts feel cloudy and I doubt every choice I make. I have problems connecting with others and my one best friend from my hometown is a huge smoker. He's the only person I still talk to from high school. We hung out a lot and played games before we smoked, but now all i feel we do is smoke and couldn't imagine what being sober with him would be like. He supplies me too. I actually feel ****** now because im starting to realize that someone who I considered a really good friend is becoming someone who I think i'm just hanging out with because of weed.
I'm sorry for typos. I've never posted here before. I'm tired now. I wanted to throw out my paraphernalia and start right now but I have to wait till tomorrow. Im beginning to wonder ill just go back to my other typical "its fine" mindset after I sleep it off. If it really is a problem causing mechanism to my life (social connections, anxiety, stress, etc), I hope I can start to make the right choices.
My wagon's in the mud.
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Bournemouth, UK
Posts: 88
Hello Elemental,
Sounds like weed just don't cut it for you no more. A wise friend told me once that we only make changes when it becomes too painful to continue.
There's loads of help here, people are great. Reading through other members daily struggles and achievements is inspiring, and people share there tips, and when you're down and weary at four am, start a thread. Some kind soul will reach out with encouragement.
Sounds like weed just don't cut it for you no more. A wise friend told me once that we only make changes when it becomes too painful to continue.
There's loads of help here, people are great. Reading through other members daily struggles and achievements is inspiring, and people share there tips, and when you're down and weary at four am, start a thread. Some kind soul will reach out with encouragement.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Planet earth
Posts: 4
hello elemental, and welcome to forum. i have been smoking for 8 years from these 4 years was a daily...i feel exactly the same as u.Im really against alcohol and I always had these excuse of not drinking any but only smoking pot.I say that im not addicted but I smoked every day so probbably I am... at first my life was so much better when smoking i started to look on all things from different prospective( in a positive way). but lately was everything just about a smoke. Years ago when i was not heavy smoker i was really social. now for last 2 or 3 years i dont want to go outside if there is no weed in the game. I dont have ANY friends so i could just go outside with them and not smoke pot. the other problem was also i ended up using about 200€ per month for weed, and my income is 400€. so imgaine what all things could i buy with that money. its really crazy. And i said to myself i have to stop it even though 5 days ago i could not imagine how it would be or that i would even quit.Im now sober for 2 days and haven't smoke any. I know that these feeling of weed is and the relaxation and everything is so great. but i believe once YOU are sober for some time you will be happy about the choice. Go read some storys on forum and see how all people feel better after stopping theri habbits. One more thing. if you want to stop smoking you need to change this habbit with something you know. most of the time we go smoke because we got nothing better to do. So find something new that will replace your bad habbit. ANS BELIEVE ME WEED AFFECTS SOCIAL LIFE ALOT.
hopping for freedom
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 847
Welcome Elemental, I think you are in the right place. I have received so much help here for the same issues. There's so much I could say but won't say it all here and now. I was addicted to weed for 22 years, smoked it almost all day every day. I totally relate to how easy it is to belittle pot addiction. I also know it was a huge problem for me.
I'm only 19 days free of weed but really happy about it all the same (started the quitting journey on here two months ago). While it's not a long time sober, I can honestly say it's a completely different experience than all the other times I tried and tried and tried. I think SR was a big part of that. I hope you decide to stick around.
I'm only 19 days free of weed but really happy about it all the same (started the quitting journey on here two months ago). While it's not a long time sober, I can honestly say it's a completely different experience than all the other times I tried and tried and tried. I think SR was a big part of that. I hope you decide to stick around.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,436
Hi Elemental 
Most of us are normal everyday folks who once would have never thought of posting on a site like this either.
I'm glad I did tho, cos SR has helped me turn my life around
I smoked weed daily for 30 years or so. You'll find a lot of other weed smokers here too - some have given it up and others are trying to.
I think you need to accept that it's probably going to take a little while to feel good again - a month may not be enough....
and you may have to re-evaluate some of your relationships too.
The good thing is you don't have to do this alone - welcome to SR
D
Most of us are normal everyday folks who once would have never thought of posting on a site like this either.
I'm glad I did tho, cos SR has helped me turn my life around
I smoked weed daily for 30 years or so. You'll find a lot of other weed smokers here too - some have given it up and others are trying to.
I think you need to accept that it's probably going to take a little while to feel good again - a month may not be enough....
and you may have to re-evaluate some of your relationships too.
The good thing is you don't have to do this alone - welcome to SR
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Joisy
Posts: 7
Thanks everyone. You all had helpful things to say and I appreciate it. I think I am making the right choice. I'm going to start today.
Wacky, I read some of your stories and although I've been smoking for a about a 1/4th of the time you have, I feel similar in certain ways. You we're the last post I read before I decided to post myself.
Wacky, I read some of your stories and although I've been smoking for a about a 1/4th of the time you have, I feel similar in certain ways. You we're the last post I read before I decided to post myself.
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