Raider

There are certain things I think and feel that I don't post on here because I am afraid they would deter a new person in recovery. For those things, I PM some people I have met here with long term sobriety and talk to them. I don't know if that's the right thing to do, but it's the right thing for me to do. If I want to drink, I won't be posting it here while it's happening. I'll post at a later date with head hung low. I am extremely concerned about how my posts may affect others. Maybe I just have a big giant ego to believe anyone actually reads them. Hahahahaha.
Now I'm going to naked twerk around my house while the coast is clear. Hahahahahahaha!!!
Love Ya' Bunches!!!!'
Pam.

GreenEggsAndHam

So proud of you Raider.

Early recovery can be such a roller coaster of emotions. I'm up, down, all over the place. Today was a bad, grumpy day for me (until my sponsor helped me sort it out - thank you HP for her!!!) and I had to up and walk out of group therapy in the middle of someone speaking just so I could hold my tongue. I feel so badly about that - I realize I'm of no help to anyone when I'm in a mood. Just saying all of that because, like you, I really just want to help and not hurt.

Have fun twerking. = )I'm going to DQ to get a Blizzard. :~p

Amajorityofone

My goodness we're a sensitive bunch, today.

Sadly, no matter how warmly you try and tell it, the truth often has no temperature. And that is that good thoughts and actions produce good results. Bad thoughts and actions produce bad results. It's just that simple. We understand this is the physical world. Yet, its affects in the cyber world are more mysterious to us, in my opinion.

Mel12

On the other hand, a twerk video might increase SR membership . . . :-)

least

It's totally up to you what you choose to reveal here.

Anna

Raider,

This is the Newcomers Forum and you don't need to just post when things are going well. Early recovery is often a struggle with ups and downs and that's why we're here. You deserve support when you're struggling too.

doggonecarl

I don't start many threads, but I do reply a lot. But even then I don't reply with every thought or idea or comment that comes into my head. I ask myself, "Is this post helpful? Supportive? Providing the OP with something they can use?

Half the time they aren't. So I don't hit post reply.

It's getting harder and harder for me to know what to reply. Posters asking for advice really don't want it, or don't want to use it. Posters wanting support can't articulate what they mean by support. Meanwhile, the numbers of posters that post once or twice and disappear grows every day. Makes me wonder if my reply or failure to reply made a difference. Or if I should expend the energy if the OP isn't going to come back and read it.

Need to just reply with cyber hugs...

(((((Raider)))))

GreenEggsAndHam

doggonecarl - I read all of your posts and many have been helpful to me even when I wasn't the original poster or posting in the thread.

Raider

I don't think a naked twerk from a 55 year old will increase anything. Hahahahaha!!! I don't post unless I'm willing to listen to advice. Which is why on my last relapse I didn't post before I drank. I wasnt in a listening place, I was in full relapse mode. Thank you guys.

suki44883

Of course you have the right not to share what you don't want to share. I understand what you are saying, Raider, but one of the main reasons we are here is to help people when they are in full relapse mode. In my opinion, you shouldn't avoid us when you are on the edge of drinking. That is when you need this forum the most.

Mel12

Thank you for bringing up age, as I am a 50-something also. Video twerk-off and let the readers decide?

On a serious note, I am most capable of having depressing thoughts about all the "years gone by." On the other hand, I am realizing that in many ways I feel a lot younger now! I am still sorting this out--and I have definitely not figured out how a twerking lifestyle might fit into the picture. Still, it is a most novel sensation to feel younger from sobriety.

Dee74

Anna and I have tried hard to keep Newcomers as the sort of place you'd want to run to if you're in trouble.

I would HATE it if people thought they could only post here sober. To me thats missing the great gift of SR - giving hope when there seems no hope to be had.

It's a difficult balance trying to be truthful yet helpful, to the point yet constructive... but I think by and large we manage it.

You guys rock

D

mecanix

There are lots of places to post on SR raider

Try not to over think yourself into a drink or over think getting support if you need it, you're the person who has to work your recovery and ensure you get what you need for it to grow . The sneaky AV/ devil / demon marra likes to spin us all kinds of traps and lies, other people will drink or not drink Raider whatever you post or not . Put your recovery FIRST because this is a life and death matter .

Tomorrow is a new day lets try and make it glorious

Bestwishes, m

Raider

Let me 'splain....I occasionally read my posts from last August. I posted plenty of drunkin' crying in my beer posts. Then relapse, relapse, rehab, relapse, relapse whew I think that brings up to date. This is gonna be weird....I'm not that person now. I wasn't concerned for anybody but myself, I've read my posts. Now I have a concern for what I post and how it might read. When I need a stronger support, I PM. So no Dee, you and Anna have absolutely done a great job welcoming all, drunk, struggling, or sober.

Olive1

Hi Raider,
When I read this thread it reminds me of that old quote that goes something like, 'there is no such thing as a dumb question'.
I think every post has something valid, for someone.
I have followed your journey in the past months and it has reminded me a lot of myself when I finally had to stop drinking.
I think you have a lot to offer newcomers, not quite there yets, and even the long timers. You never know when something you might post may just click with someone. It has with me many times.

ru12

Raider I think we do the best we can at that particular moment. When we know better we do better. I think stories like yours are powerful. Sobriety didn't gone easy for you, but you kept getting back up and kept trying. I know I relapsed for years until I found what works for me. This sobriety thing is hard won. Well done friend.

tornrealization

To those who wonder what newcomer think. Newcomers may be come and go. How many times have any of us woke up, said I'd never drink again and not make it. I think you may never know who you are helping and when. How many of us lurk first?

You never know when your words are helping someone. I say keep giving advice. It may be helping people and you don't even realize it.

My first six weeks sober this year I ended my nights reading this site and threads and posts. I did not sign up or post. But I still got support. I thank all those who keep trying to help others.

Raider you're doing great and I love your freedom to twerk at any age.

Received

Raider,

All those posts are part of your journey. I clearly remember following you through your tug of war about going to rehab and your relapses. I'm sure that there are people here that benefited from reading about your struggle (not at your expense of course). I'll tell you the truth, some of it was very painful to read. At times I wanted to jump through the computer screen and shake you into your senses. But it was a stark reminder of how insane our thinking can get. (No offense)

Thing is, I came here half in the bag with my very first post and because of members in all different stages of recovery I was able to put the drink down midway through my first thread. I'm sure there were several posters who wanted to ring my neck. Heck, there are likely several posters that still want to do that.

Do you get what I'm trying to say or am I babbling? lol

CuteNGayYay

Work it gurl!

not2late

Dear raider..I'm still struggling. How long have you been sober? In other words when was your last drink? I've been reading your posts for some time..I followed your way to rehab I admire your strength. You being strong helps us be strong.