Flying4Life

I am so grateful to be sober today. Yesterday was a tough one for me. I was really emotional, dealing with a bit of grief, and completely stressed out. I am dealing with some severe burnout in my post-graduate studies and this is causing symptoms of depression to resurface, something I haven't had to deal with in a long time.

Yesterday, I was longing for beer like I haven't since I got sober. I imagined the smell, taste, and feeling of drinking it. I really just wanted a few beers to take the edge off of my feelings. But I am so glad that I didn't, I am already struggling with negativity. At least being sober won't make my problems any worse and they are manageable, difficult but manageable as long as I don't drink.

Being sober hasn't solved all my problems but it does give me the opportunity to work through them and find the solutions and compromises that I need in order to cope.

I need help in order to get through this stress and constant worrying and self-depreciation. But the last place I am going to find that help is at the bottom of a bottle.

I am learning new coping skills and it is far from easy but it is worth it. I know that if I had picked up that drink I would feel totally hopeless today. I am glad that I am not alone in this struggle, that there are people out there who understand what it is like to work hard to learn how to live their life again without the poisonous emotional crutch of alcohol.

It is hard to believe I made it through yesterday. I am going to try to get more exercise and hopefully that will help.

Marcher13

That's brilliant Flying! Good for you, I am cheering you on from Australia.

gorc

Thanks for inspiration. Great job

Aarryckha

I'm so proud of you for not putting that poison back in your body!

I'm sorry you're having a tough time with things. Look at how far you've come though. You have written some very wise words. Take a couple of deep breaths and just take it an hour at a time if that's what it takes.

Hang in there!

Ruby2

Sounds like you did a great job of it and are doing the right things to stay sober. Things may seem bumpy now but they will get better. I am in total empathy. I have had depression return and have to stop procrastinating and call my doctor to get my referral letter for counseling.

I have had the thought of alcohol too. The smell, taste and feel but then I keep going to the buzzy, dizzy feeling I get when I have when I have a couple which I want to go away so then I drink even more to drown out that feeling. I further think about the next day when I know I will feel like something the cat dragged in and I feel like crying.

Your post was inspiration to me this morning. Thank you! You can do it.

MnEman

thank you for your positive post, that is really inspiring to the rest of us in early recovery. I too am struggling with strong feelings (mainly work related) and I am learning that I need actual coping skills, but it is liberating letting some of the anxiety go and getting on with improving my life, as you are doing.

KateL

Well done to you xxxxx

SoulKat

Way to go. You totally inspired me this morning. Thanks for sharing!