Relapsed?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 43
Relapsed?
He's been sober for 18 months now and has been doing great. We got back in touch and it was cautious but nice.
However, he lost all contact 2 weeks ago after a somewhat steady communication, again leaving me hanging there. Concerned that he might have relapsed but don't want to assume anything.
Is it normal for a recovering addict to suddenly not responding to any sort of contact without any warning signs other than having a relapse?
Have any of you experienced this and what did you do to help out? If he indeed relapsed, what could have happened during these 2 weeks.
However, he lost all contact 2 weeks ago after a somewhat steady communication, again leaving me hanging there. Concerned that he might have relapsed but don't want to assume anything.
Is it normal for a recovering addict to suddenly not responding to any sort of contact without any warning signs other than having a relapse?
Have any of you experienced this and what did you do to help out? If he indeed relapsed, what could have happened during these 2 weeks.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
It could be anything and it's up to you to decide of you want to live a life of second guessing someone who still exhibits addiction traits whether he is using or not.
My son used to lie to people about his clean time. I remember him calling an old girlfriend once and telling her he had 5 months clean when, in reality, he didn't have 5 minutes. I cringed when I heard that and wanted to warn her...and did when she asked me about why he seemed unchanged if he was clean.
He may be using, he may have just lost interest in being with you...and so very sorry if that sounds harsh because it may hurt but it may be a reason.
It might be a good idea to keep some time and space between you unless you want to get drawn back into the "is he using...has he relapsed?" daily mindset.
Life is short, don't waste any of it chasing that which doesn't want to get caught.
Hugs
My son used to lie to people about his clean time. I remember him calling an old girlfriend once and telling her he had 5 months clean when, in reality, he didn't have 5 minutes. I cringed when I heard that and wanted to warn her...and did when she asked me about why he seemed unchanged if he was clean.
He may be using, he may have just lost interest in being with you...and so very sorry if that sounds harsh because it may hurt but it may be a reason.
It might be a good idea to keep some time and space between you unless you want to get drawn back into the "is he using...has he relapsed?" daily mindset.
Life is short, don't waste any of it chasing that which doesn't want to get caught.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Does it really matter? Do you want this in your life? I am not trying to be harsh, just wanting to point out that a relationship with a person who just falls off the radar for two weeks w/no warning is not stability for you, no matter what the reason is.
I am sorry you are dealing with this.
I am sorry you are dealing with this.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
man you gotta get up early to beat HOPEFUL to the punch!
take addiction/recovery out of it...look at the behavior on it's own...without being tempered or somehow "justified" is it at ALL acceptable to you for him to just shut down for over two weeks?
now certainly he can DO whatever he wants...this isn't about whether he has good reasons, bad reasons, no reasons. it's about how it affects YOU.
take addiction/recovery out of it...look at the behavior on it's own...without being tempered or somehow "justified" is it at ALL acceptable to you for him to just shut down for over two weeks?
now certainly he can DO whatever he wants...this isn't about whether he has good reasons, bad reasons, no reasons. it's about how it affects YOU.
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