liss74

Did it again think might have to go to rehab ! Spoke to my husband but he's like no way ???

Coldfusion

Have you thought of just doing an in-patient detox program? Some rehabs won't take you unless you've been detoxed.

liss74

Yes I'm really enjoying my drink NOT the whole time I'm like you've done it again ??

Dee74

I think time away, in a secure environment, might be what you need liss.

I have to ask tho - what are you thinking before you drink? whats going on in your head?

D

Jeni26

Liss..I think you need to do WHATEVER IT TAKES. Whatever program you choose, whatever help you seek, you need to follow it like your life depends on it, which it may well do.

Addiction has got you in its grip. It is whispering its lies to you, and you are listening.

Rehab is something different, something radical. Maybe it's just what you need. Wouldn't hurt to make enquiries would it? How about seeking some medical advice for the detoxing too?

Make today the day you make a fresh start with this. The first day of the rest of your life. X

liss74

I'm on the right track then bam it comes and I fight it but grip is to strong and I give in I don't know what I'm thinking to be honest I just don't know why really being honest I shared at meeting today I'm so scared going back and I meant it with every fiber in my body I did what the hell is wrong with me

liss74

No matter what I know I have an addiction and I'm weak it's swallowing me up can't seem to get out

Dee74

I think one of the important things is believing you can do this.
If you can't believe in yourself right now? believe in your Higher Power Liss - whatewver that is for you.

The other really important thing is - it's ok to be uncomfortable, to be really scared, or to really want something you know you really can't have.

If you sit with those feelings a while, they pass....

Have lots of numbers you can call. Get on SR if you can.
Don;t be afraid to ask for help - you're not a burden - people really do want you to call or to post when you're in trouble
you can beat this Liss - you really can.

D

liss74

Thank you x

MythOfSisyphus

Hang in there, Liss. Sometimes we stumble but we have to get back up. You can get things back on track. You just have to be ready and willing to do what whatever it takes.

Goldcoastgirl

Wish I could reach thru this site and give you a big hug. We have to believe we can do this. Do you know I don't even like take the taste of the wine I drink half the time, just the numbness but it's not worth the feeling of beating yourself up like you are now. Hang in there sweetheart x

liss74

I've tried and tried

Goldcoastgirl

I know but you have to be kind to yourself. If you want to go to rehab you may need to go without your husband's approval but this is your life and you are worth fighting for. You are your own person.

cheebiechi

You on the right track Liss,

Do you have non drinking friends you can talk to outside of this website?
I am here to chat if your needing it....

STAY STRONG,

One Day At A Time

Matt

MythOfSisyphus

Tomorrow is another day, Liss. No amount of past failure can prevent you from future success. I know you're trying, just have faith that things can be better.

NewMe30

I'm going to rehab also. Go. I'll keep in touch with you? We can support each other if you like?

afloatsober

Go to rehab Liss. Do it for you! See your doctor who might help start the ball rolling.... You need to get off the 'merry go round'. Tell people that can help the truth about what you are feeling and the extent of your problem so that they can do their best to help you. No more secrets.
It can be done, and you can do it, but it can be left too late.
I told myself the last time. OK, if this illness is going to get me it will, but not until i had done EVERYTHING that i could do for myself. I owed myself at least that!!!!!!!!
I'm 11 months sober now after 17 years trying.
You can be to. Just stop fighting and let the mask slip if needs be.
Risk it.
You will be alright Liss.
If you don't trust yourself as i didn't, trust others that have been where you are now and have prevailed.
Gx

aasharon90

Acceptance is the key. Accepting I have
a problem with alcohol and admitting that
I am Powerless over it.

POWERLESS

Courage to change things in my life
associated with drinking and alcohol.

If it is not in my home I can't be tempted
to drink it. All alcohol related items were
removed from my home.

Being around folks that drink, especially
in early recovery was a no no for me.
There's too much temptation involved
being around folks, family, friends, in
bars, clubs, their homes, family functions,
celebratory events.

If recovery/sobriety was to happen I
had to take that step to go to any lengths
to not drink and use knowledge of recovery
taught to me and tools provided to me
to use in my everyday life.

I learned that I didn't have to go thru
recovery alone or by myself. That there
are many in the same boat as I willing
to help at all times while I went thru my
changes.

I listened to the words of experience,
wisdom and hope that if these people
could and would remain sober a day
at a time for long periods of time, then
so could I.

And I have and still do one day at a
time because yesterday is gone and
tomorrow hasn't come yet. So today
is all I have to enjoy being sober.

You can too.

GreenEggsAndHam

Liss I am the same way so I can relate. I keep trying to control it rather than accept that it's controlling me. It's been very, very hard for me to accept that I'm powerless over my addiction (it always wins!!) but I'm starting to accept that now.

I'm in IOP (intensive out patient treatment) and it really helps. Weekends are hardest because we don't go and I don't have my group to fall back on. I would do inpatient if I could. I would never let my husband decide for me, though. I went to a therapist and we decided together.

Good luck and much support here.

least

I hope you can find a way to beat this thing. You deserve a happy sober life.