The urge to drink
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: CA
Posts: 170
The urge to drink
The urge to drink seems to come at me more when I am alone and sad. Today is a sad one for me. I have nothing to occupy my time right now. All my homework is done, my surgery for Wednesday is scheduled, and I have nothing to do. I have a meeting at 8 but being without a car (which I think is a blessing right now) kind of leaves me stranded. I hate eating dinner alone. I don't like going to my home. Although I guess that is the best place for me. Ah heck.... (I mean the bad version of that but don't want to use foul language). I have 12 days on me right now. I picked up a new sponsor last night. I read the book on the way in to work today, I've prayed and prayed and cried and cried. And yet, I still have this huge hole in my chest I can't fill. I have 3 things carrying me right now. This board, my home-group, and my higher power. I wish I could just make it all go away. Those steps are taking way too long to work for me. 14 days is my longest sober, and I'm worried. Sorry to be a drag.
Last edited by mimi2014; 03-03-2014 at 04:56 PM. Reason: typo
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,502
Hi Mimi,
What kinds of things would you like to do to fill your time if you have nothing to do? Do you have any hobbies, are you involved in any kind of exercise program, do you like books or movies? I hope you can find something to do that you enjoy. It will get easier.
Have you read our Sticky?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ething-do.html
What kinds of things would you like to do to fill your time if you have nothing to do? Do you have any hobbies, are you involved in any kind of exercise program, do you like books or movies? I hope you can find something to do that you enjoy. It will get easier.
Have you read our Sticky?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ething-do.html
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,436
Stick around here Mimi - read some stories, post to others, go into chat, play in the arcade...before you know it it will be bed time and you'll have another sober day down 
Best wishes for your surgery too
D
Best wishes for your surgery too
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: CA
Posts: 170
Thanks Anna & Dee... I love to run. Unfortunately, the surgery they have me scheduled for on Wed will prevent me from doing any of that for the next 6 weeks. That's going to drive me crazy. My hobbies? Computers are pretty much my only hobby. When school is out in June I'm gong to volunteer at a homeless shelter to do whatever I can. Other than that. FB games keep me occupied, but they are starting to get boring and I need to rebuild the computer at home. No sound and bad video makes it very frustrating.
Hey Dee - where's the arcade?
Chatting with all of you helps a lot though.
Hey Dee - where's the arcade?
Chatting with all of you helps a lot though.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Ohio
Posts: 25
Hey Mimi,
Really Sorry you are having a bad day! Like others have said, find something you really enjoy to do whether its watch TV, read, exercise, or feel like a rock star because you are almost at your record days of sobriety, 14!
In these situations in early sobriety, we just need to occupy our time. It really does get easier the further down the road you get
Really Sorry you are having a bad day! Like others have said, find something you really enjoy to do whether its watch TV, read, exercise, or feel like a rock star because you are almost at your record days of sobriety, 14!
In these situations in early sobriety, we just need to occupy our time. It really does get easier the further down the road you get
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Indiana
Posts: 1,472
Two weeks in I remember feeling this way as well. I live alone and it was that quiet time alone after work that got me craving the most. I eventually found things to fill my time and keep me occupied. I created a new routine and, eventually, the time passed by and things got easier. Now I enjoy my alone time but it took awhile to get there.
Of of the things I did A LOT in the early days was watch movies and documentaries about alcohol abuse. In the News area of this forum you can find a lot of recommendations (Netflix became my best friend). It may be a trigger for you but for me it was a motivator. Perhaps it will be for you as well!
Stick with it and keep going. You are at the point where things start to get better soon Just keep remembering that feeling you have waking up sober and proud of your accomplishment the day before!
Of of the things I did A LOT in the early days was watch movies and documentaries about alcohol abuse. In the News area of this forum you can find a lot of recommendations (Netflix became my best friend). It may be a trigger for you but for me it was a motivator. Perhaps it will be for you as well!
Stick with it and keep going. You are at the point where things start to get better soon
Just keep remembering that feeling you have waking up sober and proud of your accomplishment the day before!
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,668
Hi mimi congratulations on your days sober, it really does get sober, thing is planning your time you'd normally be s*******d and out of it! cost there's so much more time to enjoy.
Hope all goes well with your surgey.xx
Hope all goes well with your surgey.xx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Engerland
Posts: 897
One of the best things about this site is the honesty with which most people share their feelings. Thank you for YOUR honesty. I am 11 months sober and some days feel just as lost and empty and alone as you do. Sometimes i think 'whats the point, life don't make any sense to me.'
But i don't drink.
Because i truly does pass and things get better and i'm only human,and i don't want to die drunk,and i deserve better, and i don't want to hurt my loved ones anymore,and i'm done with self loathing and destruction, and i do believe in a loving God, and i do wan't to help others , AND I AM WORTH IT.
And so are you..........
G
But i don't drink.
Because i truly does pass and things get better and i'm only human,and i don't want to die drunk,and i deserve better, and i don't want to hurt my loved ones anymore,and i'm done with self loathing and destruction, and i do believe in a loving God, and i do wan't to help others , AND I AM WORTH IT.
And so are you..........
G
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
It takes time. Early i had to face the challenge of the desire to avoid discomfort. I realised the only way forward was not to avoid painful or challenging feelings. Its not pleasant but now its something i try to follow as a principle.
Best of luck
Best of luck
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Ohio
Posts: 25
Hi Mimi,
Thought about you today And wanted to recommend a game ( you stated you liked games )to get if you are an iPhone person. It's " words with friends". Over my first year of sobriety it definitely got me through some anxious times and periods of boredom, which was an old trigger that used to lead to drinking. It's little things like this that i grabbed on to when I had cravings early on in recovery...Have a great day!
Thought about you today And wanted to recommend a game ( you stated you liked games )to get if you are an iPhone person. It's " words with friends". Over my first year of sobriety it definitely got me through some anxious times and periods of boredom, which was an old trigger that used to lead to drinking. It's little things like this that i grabbed on to when I had cravings early on in recovery...Have a great day!
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