grateful6982

I often wondered over the last few years how I would be able to tell if my AH was really clean. When we were in the middle of his very active heroin addiction, I thought that I would never see the man I married and have 2 beautiful kids with. I just have to share that, though he is very early in recovery, when someone is truly focused on being clean you will have no doubts that they are clean. It has taken my AH 4 trips to jail and 4 trips to rehab, but he finally took his recovery in his own hands. I also took my recovery into my own hands. My children and I have never been happier. AH is living in a sober house and the change has been remarkable. It was so hard to let go of the urge to control everything, but my life is so much better for doing the work to let go. When I see AH I see a new man, he is humble and hungry for life. I had really given up on the hope of having my family back but now I am excited for the possibility of this new, stronger family unit. It will always be a struggle for both of us, but we are both now focused on ourselves instead of each other and for that I am grateful.

LoveMeNow

That's great.

I have seen "it" too. There is no mistaking it. Using looks like Using, and recovery looks like recovery. Unfortunately, my (soon to be ex ) husband went back out and is still lost in his addiction. But I know he has the tools when or if the pain of using becomes too great.

grateful6982

I think, for me, the greatest feeling is the confidence I have in myself. I know he could slip right back into the addiction very easily, but I feel confident now that my boundaries are firm and won't slip just because he does. I am happy for him and us but I am proud of myself and that is not easy for me to say. I am finally thriving and it is because of my own actions. No one can take that from me.

BlueChair

My husband is early in his recovery and I remember the days not long ago when I looked in his eyes and he wasn’t there, but now he is back and while its been rough for him, I see how hard he's trying, working and I feel like my love and respect for him has grown deeper. He’s fragile right now and I understand he could relapse, but I'm not expecting his recovery to be perfect.

What’s incredible and something I never would have believed a few months ago, I feel Ive grown, become stronger in my own right. Ive made mistakes but getting through them has empowered me ! I'm still learning, growing, and sometimes I'm scared, but deep inside I know whatever happens I will be OK. Thank you for sharing your story today because I feel inspired to hear it, and comforted to know I'm not alone.

penny9175

My husband is also in recovery after a slip up two weeks ago. I'm so happy you found your confidence!!! Hold onto that!

MLJ88

Thank you for sharing your stories. It gives me hope that one day my AH will use the potential that he has to get clean. I know that there is a possibility that he will never truly seek recovery, but I pray he does. It's nice to hear success stories.