I'm not sure I belong here, but hello anyway.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 3
I'm not sure I belong here, but hello anyway.
I'm not sure I belong here because I don't need recovery. I have tried not to become an addict, and succeded so far.
The reason I am posting is that my Dad is killing himself with alcohol. It would be so easy to ignore him, just like he did to me for so many years. But I feel this would be the wrong thing to do.
According to what he told me when I was a kid, I should give him "a **** round the chops" and tell him "stop being such a ******* mummys boy"
I admit I am a bit drunk, but doing exactly that sounds like a good idea now. Any thoughts?
I am a heavy drinker myself. I drink to escape, I know that is not healthy. I also use drugs occasionally. The last forum I went for such things claimed to be my best friends, until I mentioned that some of the chems were not legal. Then they ignored me.
The reason I am posting is that my Dad is killing himself with alcohol. It would be so easy to ignore him, just like he did to me for so many years. But I feel this would be the wrong thing to do.
According to what he told me when I was a kid, I should give him "a **** round the chops" and tell him "stop being such a ******* mummys boy"
I admit I am a bit drunk, but doing exactly that sounds like a good idea now. Any thoughts?
I am a heavy drinker myself. I drink to escape, I know that is not healthy. I also use drugs occasionally. The last forum I went for such things claimed to be my best friends, until I mentioned that some of the chems were not legal. Then they ignored me.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Welcome to the SR family. 
We have a friends and family of alcoholics forum here that you might find interesting and enlightening.
I'm glad you found us.
It sounds like your relationship with alcohol isn't too healthy. Perhaps with our support you can stop drinking and treat yourself to a sober life.
We have a friends and family of alcoholics forum here that you might find interesting and enlightening. I'm glad you found us.
It sounds like your relationship with alcohol isn't too healthy. Perhaps with our support you can stop drinking and treat yourself to a sober life.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi OOO - welcome
We have a lot of members here who are here for loved ones.
We have a lot of people who, at the same time, are also here for their own drinking or drug use.
Its a tough situation with your Dad. Do you live with him?
D
We have a lot of members here who are here for loved ones.
We have a lot of people who, at the same time, are also here for their own drinking or drug use.
Its a tough situation with your Dad. Do you live with him?
D
Closing the gates of Oblivion
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: OK, USA
Posts: 273
This is a great place for getting help with any situation revolving around alcohol/addiction. There is a forum for family members of abusers here too. You are welcome here anytime and might find someone in your same position that you can relate to.
And thank goodness this forum doesn't ignore or kick people out for illegal actions/behavior because I wouldn't have been able to even log in with my history, lol!
And thank goodness this forum doesn't ignore or kick people out for illegal actions/behavior because I wouldn't have been able to even log in with my history, lol!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 3
Hello again.
Would like to explain things a little better.
"It sounds like your relationship with alcohol isn't too healthy."
I agree. However the amount I drink now is far less than previous years. It is not alcohol that is the problem.
"Its a tough situation with your Dad. Do you live with him?"
No. I am 30 years old, I think I spoke to him less than five times in the past 8 years. The second from last time, he was almost dead, in the hospital, massively underweight, hallucinating, pissing in a bottle then asking his (now ex) girlfriend to wipe his **** in a way that me and my sister couldn't see. After that, he told me everyone was an ********, and that I should drive him home. When I told him I didn't have a car, or a license to drive one, he was very upset. I don't think he belived me.
Six months later, he was much better. I arranged for my sister to come pick me up, (in his car) we went and had an icecream together. It was very odd, but was good to see the dude I remembered, not a spaz.
Another six months later, my sis went to see him, he was sat with a can of Stella. He had bought a new car with the last of his savings, but couldn't afford to drive it.
My sister asked me what I thought she should do. I said she should take the car back to the dealer, or sell it and give him the cash if that was not possible.
She wanted the car.
I wanted to disown my family.
I'm sat here full of guilt typing my life story in the wrong place,
Hmmmmm, that ended longer than I Intended it to be...
Anyway, on a happier note, I managed to scrape together enough cash to buy myself a motorcycle. I strongly recomend it. Nothing clears the mind better that I have seen, appart from one chemical I will not name. I'm not sure it is any safer than the chemicals people get addicted to, but if you survive it is most certainly healthier.
PS- Do not ride a motorbike when intoxicated!!!
Would like to explain things a little better.
"It sounds like your relationship with alcohol isn't too healthy."
I agree. However the amount I drink now is far less than previous years. It is not alcohol that is the problem.
"Its a tough situation with your Dad. Do you live with him?"
No. I am 30 years old, I think I spoke to him less than five times in the past 8 years. The second from last time, he was almost dead, in the hospital, massively underweight, hallucinating, pissing in a bottle then asking his (now ex) girlfriend to wipe his **** in a way that me and my sister couldn't see. After that, he told me everyone was an ********, and that I should drive him home. When I told him I didn't have a car, or a license to drive one, he was very upset. I don't think he belived me.
Six months later, he was much better. I arranged for my sister to come pick me up, (in his car) we went and had an icecream together. It was very odd, but was good to see the dude I remembered, not a spaz.
Another six months later, my sis went to see him, he was sat with a can of Stella. He had bought a new car with the last of his savings, but couldn't afford to drive it.
My sister asked me what I thought she should do. I said she should take the car back to the dealer, or sell it and give him the cash if that was not possible.
She wanted the car.
I wanted to disown my family.
I'm sat here full of guilt typing my life story in the wrong place,
Hmmmmm, that ended longer than I Intended it to be...
Anyway, on a happier note, I managed to scrape together enough cash to buy myself a motorcycle. I strongly recomend it. Nothing clears the mind better that I have seen, appart from one chemical I will not name. I'm not sure it is any safer than the chemicals people get addicted to, but if you survive it is most certainly healthier.
PS- Do not ride a motorbike when intoxicated!!!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,505
Have you considered AlAnon as a support for yourself in dealing with your father? It could be helpful. Also, we have a Friends & Families forum on this board where you will find support.
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