least

I won't drink over it. I know better now than to think drinking would make anything better. It won't, and will actually make things worse.

To those who don't know me, my mother is in assisted living due to dementia. I visit her every weekday (brother goes on weekends) and talk with her and care for her three cats. (that's why we chose that Place, cause they allowed cats) I come home from those visits totally drained of all positive energy and full to the brim with depression and anxiety. Not to mention, I'm scared to death of it happening to me.

On top of all that, I made a 'small' financial mistake today that will cost me in overdraft charges I can ill afford. BUT I won't drink over it.

When I feel low, which is often lately, I come here and respond to posts and voice my thoughts, which helps me a lot. I also have gratitude to get me thru the hard times, even when, like today, I don't feel grateful at all.

So for all those having a hard time staying sober in difficult times - YOU CAN DO IT!! Force yourself to be grateful for something, even just one thing. It helps.



I love you all very much!

Weasel1966

Thank you! Hang in there!

Raider

I'm sorry you're having a bad day. I understand completely. Blessings.

Carlotta

Sending you hugs and support ****}}

Marcher13

Least I am giving you a big cyber hug, your presence at SR is enormously comforting to me and I hope we can support you now.

Delphine

You are a strong person and I appreciate your post. I too struggle with depression and anxiety and used to drink in order to avoid dealing with those feelings. I am in early sobriety and I will take your advice of being grateful and trying to come on SR to express thoughts and respond to posts.

Dee74

It's a difficult thing, I know least, but you're much loved here

D

Duffster

I'm sorry you're having such a difficult day but thank you for posting your words and your message - I think you just helped more people stay sober today than you'll know.

Notimetoloose

My mum is in assisted living as well, she has been there for a few years now and apart from the compromised relationship I now have with her.
My own mortality and life really smacks me in the face as I watch her decline. ....It is tough spending time with her, not because I don't love her, I do...it's just tough.

You are such an asset and powerhouse on this forum, thank you so much

JustMeg

Thanks for sharing that Least, and sorry you're having such a crappy day. I think the realisation that using won't make me feel any better about any situation is the most important thing that I have learned so far in recovery. I'm glad you have had that realisation too. Your posts help so much

Jill23

Positive vibes sent your way

silentrun

Thanks for all you do here Least. Much appreciated. Sorry you are having a crappy day. Ask your bank to wave the OD charge. Sometimes they will.

doggonecarl

Well I'm grateful to you, Least. My very first friend request came from you, for that I'm grateful. When you "like" my dog picture posts, I'm grateful because I know how much you dogs mean to you. Bet they're grateful to you.

And everyone you greet or respond to on SR is probably grateful...even if they don't recognize the feeling yet.

Hang in there!

hypochondriac

Sorry you are having a bad day Least. You spend so much time helping others here and never complain about your own stuff. Positive thoughts coming your way xxx

2muchpain

Least,
You are such a tremendous inspiration on SR, and I mean it!! For you to be going through what you are puts my small problems in perspective. I have a lot to be grateful for but rarely take the time to think of them Thank you. I hope things start to pick up for you soon. I am very grateful for your posts.

jaynie04

Least…you are a constant beacon of unwavering support and kindness. I hope you can absorb the reflection back from all the light you have bestowed on us. (((Hugs)))

aasharon90

A many a times when I don't know
what to do about people, places or
things in life, I place them all in my
HP's or God's hands. That way, it
takes the pressure off of me. I can
relax and fears melt away.

I place my trust in the Man upstairs
for many things so I don't have to
worry so much.

You can too. It will all be ok.

SoberLeigh

Least - you raise so many of us up day after day; we do the same for you now in our hearts and minds and in our prayers. Dementia is cruel and unyielding and its "rippling" effect devastates not only the patient but the entire family. You have just described the last three years of my life; my heart goes out to you. Stay well and strong; PM me if you would like to talk about this at length.

alphaomega

Awwww, Least. I'm so sorry you are facing these difficulties. May I suggest taking an Epsom salt bath. It will help diffuse some of that sad and anxious energy you are picking up from the home you mom is in.

Sending you lots and lots of love and peaceful gentle energy.

Be well our friend.

Hevyn

Will send up prayers for your mom and you. Such a sad and challenging thing to go through.

Isn't it amazing when we finally realize drinking isn't going to help us through these times? As you said - it would just make everything worse. Being disappointed in ourselves for caving would be horrible. I'm so glad you aren't tempted - and that you wanted to share with us. You're important here and we couldn't do without you - so take good care of least and may tomorrow find you feeling more hopeful.