sweeping up egg shells
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sweeping up egg shells
I worked yesterday and when I came home had to take my son to practice again…….It is my get away……I love going to all his games and practices…….I usually go to practices alone and sometimes my H will accompany me to games……(It is my secret get away)
I am trying to think why I would feel lost without my H…….I am actually trying to figure out why I like him………90% of the time he is a miserable, self absorbed, bitter, angry person. The other 10% is this loving, kind, responsible, hard working, good looking, gorgeous, great sex….,caring of a man…
I really have been working on myself not letting him get to me…….I was thinking lastnight as I was lying in bed with him listening to him complain…..I was thinking to myself, WOW, this guy really has a lot of problems……..I was actually have listening to him going into my own world as he is speaking, I was thinking quack, quack, quack………..I was actually feeling sorry for the poor bastard, because I am realizing just how sick he is…….no matter how sweet and kind I am, no matter how much I show him I love him……no matter how clean the house is……no matter how hard my kids try……it is never going to be good enough……..I am just seeing how much this problem is lying within himself………and no one can help him but him………and it is not drinking, drinking is his escape from himself……..
Why do I think so low of myself that I have stayed with a man, who has abused me physically, mentally and who has cheated on me………..I am better then that……..I deserve more………
So many people on this site, have been so kind and so understanding………I want to say thank you so much………I see me in so many of these posts, it is scary………I am longer feeling alone…………I have friends for life……………….I am realizing how powerless I am with everything and everyone.
except for myself and so that is who I am going to work on………I feel like screaming to the world, I am free………………â₠¬Â¦the egg shells are swept up and thrown in the garbage. I am no longer going to live in his world…………..I am going to live In my world………
I am trying to think why I would feel lost without my H…….I am actually trying to figure out why I like him………90% of the time he is a miserable, self absorbed, bitter, angry person. The other 10% is this loving, kind, responsible, hard working, good looking, gorgeous, great sex….,caring of a man…
I really have been working on myself not letting him get to me…….I was thinking lastnight as I was lying in bed with him listening to him complain…..I was thinking to myself, WOW, this guy really has a lot of problems……..I was actually have listening to him going into my own world as he is speaking, I was thinking quack, quack, quack………..I was actually feeling sorry for the poor bastard, because I am realizing just how sick he is…….no matter how sweet and kind I am, no matter how much I show him I love him……no matter how clean the house is……no matter how hard my kids try……it is never going to be good enough……..I am just seeing how much this problem is lying within himself………and no one can help him but him………and it is not drinking, drinking is his escape from himself……..
Why do I think so low of myself that I have stayed with a man, who has abused me physically, mentally and who has cheated on me………..I am better then that……..I deserve more………
So many people on this site, have been so kind and so understanding………I want to say thank you so much………I see me in so many of these posts, it is scary………I am longer feeling alone…………I have friends for life……………….I am realizing how powerless I am with everything and everyone.
except for myself and so that is who I am going to work on………I feel like screaming to the world, I am free………………â₠¬Â¦the egg shells are swept up and thrown in the garbage. I am no longer going to live in his world…………..I am going to live In my world………
Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Baltimore,MD
Posts: 150
Preach on sister. I was thinking for a second we were married to the same guy.
Is yours drinking at the moment? Mine isn't and he's getting worse and worse every day. Tonight he went ballistic on our son, yelling and acting more like a child than our boy, because he was trying to put the tent up in the yard...practicing for a camping trip and he (our son) wasn't helping enthusiastically enough.
Can't stand him. Litterally cant stand him drinking OR not anymore.
Is yours drinking at the moment? Mine isn't and he's getting worse and worse every day. Tonight he went ballistic on our son, yelling and acting more like a child than our boy, because he was trying to put the tent up in the yard...practicing for a camping trip and he (our son) wasn't helping enthusiastically enough.
Can't stand him. Litterally cant stand him drinking OR not anymore.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Baltimore,MD
Posts: 150
I can't imagine what it must be like, not to have to constantly listen to someone complain these days. I am trying so hard not to let it effect me but I KNOW it is because I've gained about 5 pounds in the past month...I'm a stress eater...I do anything I can to avoid conversations or rather his bi***ing sessions about his job, the kids, the cat, family...whatever. I've been biting back lately and that just makes things worse.
Does there come a time for any of you that you almost wish they'd go get drunk because you just can't take it anymore?
Mine refuses to go to AA so I think I'm doomed.
Does there come a time for any of you that you almost wish they'd go get drunk because you just can't take it anymore?
Mine refuses to go to AA so I think I'm doomed.
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No, My husband hasnt drank for 67 days.......ever since he told me about the affair.....he said he would do anything to keep me.....he loved me so much he couldnt live without me.....bla bla bla..........or I should say quack quack quack....I have thought at times during this 67 days, Oh, my ??? just go get a frickin beer......AHHHHHHHHHHH...
I think it is just a matter of time before he does go by beer...because he hasn’t quit for himself, he has quit for me…..he is constantly saying that he quit for me and if he drinks he wont have his wife anymore if it was up to him he would go by a 12 pack……I have told him it is his choice I am not going to be his mother and tell him he can or he cant……..I have said to him that I cant live the way I use to……..but I am not going to encourage it....and I cant worry about it……..I have to work on me…….I have to keep reminding myself daily, that he is just quacking, I am trying very hard to not take it personal, the first sign of me starting to get upset…….I am making excuses to get away…..right when he first starts…I will give him a hug and a kiss and say honey I need to switch laundry, do you need anything washed…..(he hasn’t caught on yet that this is how I am escaping) or just anything like that….would you like something special for dinner tonight…….I am going to start dinner…….just anything to get away…….but it is getting frustrating for me because there is always a reason he is in a bad mood……and then he apologizes…..but meantime he hasn’t turned into a war between the two of us……..and I am at more peace……I have a lot of work to do……the first sign of it I just run like hell.......before it gets to me.....WOW, is it alot of work.......but it is more draining letting it get to me and fighting all night........
I have realized that he is an a**hole whether he is drinking or not.......the difference is when he has had some beer, he would get more violent.......he would cuss more, he would almost get on a high horse thinking he could do no wrong......I am sure you know what I am talking about. I will not fall apart if or when he starts drinking again.....he is only going to be hurting himself and me IF I LET HIM........but I am determined to not let him bother me anymore........
I think it is just a matter of time before he does go by beer...because he hasn’t quit for himself, he has quit for me…..he is constantly saying that he quit for me and if he drinks he wont have his wife anymore if it was up to him he would go by a 12 pack……I have told him it is his choice I am not going to be his mother and tell him he can or he cant……..I have said to him that I cant live the way I use to……..but I am not going to encourage it....and I cant worry about it……..I have to work on me…….I have to keep reminding myself daily, that he is just quacking, I am trying very hard to not take it personal, the first sign of me starting to get upset…….I am making excuses to get away…..right when he first starts…I will give him a hug and a kiss and say honey I need to switch laundry, do you need anything washed…..(he hasn’t caught on yet that this is how I am escaping) or just anything like that….would you like something special for dinner tonight…….I am going to start dinner…….just anything to get away…….but it is getting frustrating for me because there is always a reason he is in a bad mood……and then he apologizes…..but meantime he hasn’t turned into a war between the two of us……..and I am at more peace……I have a lot of work to do……the first sign of it I just run like hell.......before it gets to me.....WOW, is it alot of work.......but it is more draining letting it get to me and fighting all night........
I have realized that he is an a**hole whether he is drinking or not.......the difference is when he has had some beer, he would get more violent.......he would cuss more, he would almost get on a high horse thinking he could do no wrong......I am sure you know what I am talking about. I will not fall apart if or when he starts drinking again.....he is only going to be hurting himself and me IF I LET HIM........but I am determined to not let him bother me anymore........
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: california
Posts: 43
Breec,
I know the constant QUAKING in my house is makeing me crazy!!! Mine even says, " why the hell does everyone put everything on the top shelf in the fridge?" Is that supposed to be a legit grip, what the heck. I just want to say because we all sit around and think of new ways to make you mad, as if you couldnt find something on your own. I just wish they would just beam back up to what ever planet he is from.
Rivercitybelle,
So thats why I have this problem with chocolate....
Hey does anyone have any Ben and Jerrys icecream, pass it over. I have my own spoon.
I know the constant QUAKING in my house is makeing me crazy!!! Mine even says, " why the hell does everyone put everything on the top shelf in the fridge?" Is that supposed to be a legit grip, what the heck. I just want to say because we all sit around and think of new ways to make you mad, as if you couldnt find something on your own. I just wish they would just beam back up to what ever planet he is from.
Rivercitybelle,
So thats why I have this problem with chocolate....
Hey does anyone have any Ben and Jerrys icecream, pass it over. I have my own spoon.
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