Lorelai

Last night my H was in the "talky" drunk stage. He started telling me that his job is really stressful and he might not want to do it anymore.

I started thinking one of these things:
1. He just wants to talk because he's drinking.
2. He wants to get some reaction out of me (not happening).
3. His job has become stressful because he can't drink while he's doing it and he's working on an excuse to stop working.

Tell me that #3 is not common. Do A's just quit their jobs so they can sit at home and drink? I've often wondered how he can make it through an entire work day without drinking.

Thanks - L

elizabeth1979

Hi!

#3 is it.
I know what this feels like. My A looked for every reason under the sun to not got to work, and switched jobs several times, all for one reason or another. Mine was drinking all throughout the day at work and it was no secret, all his co-workers knew..so it wasnt that he needed to be able to drink.

I came to the conclusion that for mine, he simply couldn't deal with the reality of life and his job reminded him that life was real.

Be careful, a new job most likely wont help anything at all
Hope this helps!

sunflowergal29

I think your a is realizing he isn't happy, just trying to find a way to be happy. I also think he may be realizing that you aren't the reason why he drinks so he has to find the reason. Maybe I am totally off base, who knows, lol!!
-SFG29

Lorelai

Thanks Elizabeth & Sunflower -
It's just so weird - his job always seemed to be everything to him. He talks about it constantly. I always thought that it was the one thing that he felt confident doing because he does it really well.

I think you're right though - I can see him saying that he wants to start working for himself thinking that he'll be able to just drink a beer now and then during the day to get him through.

I guess I always thought that A's got fired for drinking. It never occurred to me that they would actually give up a good job just to drink. What a horrible way to live.
L

Gracey

My H is always talking about getting another job.........see before this job he was working at a bar as a cook........he wouldnt go in until I came home, which would be around 4:30 and he would work till 12:00, but wouldnt make it home till sometimes 4:00am in the morning, the owner of the bar would close it and any of the employees that he liked wanted to stay and drink he would let them stay in and the would party all night....He frequently talks about how much he misses being a line cook, and how he wishes he could go back.........(wonder why) hmmmmmmmmmmmmm......

His job that he has now he has to work 6:00 am till 2:30 pm.......he gets full benefits for our whole family, even my two older kids that are not his.........(2nd marriage)...he gets paid vacations, sick time and he is in the union.....(UAW Ford Child Development Center)........why would he want to go back to line cooking????????? DAAAAHHHHHHHH he loves the night life, and everyone around him at the bar was a alcoholic too......he fit right in.....he would come home sometimes and tell me how some of the regulars would come and sit in the same spot and tell there wo's of how there wife left them and they didnt get why..............for some reason he thought he was above all that, (see he had to be there, that was the only skill he had, so it was not like he was going there to party..........he was going there to work.......

jstacntryrose

You Said it breec3!!!!!! Why would he want to be somewhere he is contrubuting vs. being where everyone else is just like him. Sounds so familiar. It just is so frusterating I could scream.