Honest advice required
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 42
Honest advice required
I don't consider myself an alcoholic. But then again, neither do most alcoholics.
Just to clarify. I don't drink during the week, and maybe have the odd one on Friday, but then Saturday night I seriously lay waste to myself.
If I go out I may have 15-20 pints of beer. If I stay in ... well ... last Saturday I had 6 pints of beer, and almost 2 bottles of red wine. The problem is now that it's starting to physically take its toll.
I'm 32, and for the last decade I could handle this input. Sure, on a Sunday I'd be hungover, but soon back to 100% on Monday morning after a great night's sleep.
But in the last 2 years or so, the hangover is dreadful. It sometimes lasts until about Wednesday. The problem is, I can no longer sleep whilst hungover. I also suffer from anxiety, and where alcohol once soothed it, it now makes it exponentially worse. So bad than even if I am literally exhausted, I can no longer get any sleep on a Sunday night. My head buzzes with fear and my heart feels like it's beating out of its chest.
Because of this very poor night's sleep, I'm barely functional for at least 2 days afterwards, and this is affecting my quality of life greatly.
I'm not sure what I'm asking for here. Perhaps some advice, or stories from people in the same situation.
Any gratefully heard.
Just to clarify. I don't drink during the week, and maybe have the odd one on Friday, but then Saturday night I seriously lay waste to myself.
If I go out I may have 15-20 pints of beer. If I stay in ... well ... last Saturday I had 6 pints of beer, and almost 2 bottles of red wine. The problem is now that it's starting to physically take its toll.
I'm 32, and for the last decade I could handle this input. Sure, on a Sunday I'd be hungover, but soon back to 100% on Monday morning after a great night's sleep.
But in the last 2 years or so, the hangover is dreadful. It sometimes lasts until about Wednesday. The problem is, I can no longer sleep whilst hungover. I also suffer from anxiety, and where alcohol once soothed it, it now makes it exponentially worse. So bad than even if I am literally exhausted, I can no longer get any sleep on a Sunday night. My head buzzes with fear and my heart feels like it's beating out of its chest.
Because of this very poor night's sleep, I'm barely functional for at least 2 days afterwards, and this is affecting my quality of life greatly.
I'm not sure what I'm asking for here. Perhaps some advice, or stories from people in the same situation.
Any gratefully heard.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
It sounds to me like drinking is causing a lot of problems for you, whether or not you consider yourself and alcoholic. Would you agree? If so, are your intentions to find a way to quit? Just about all of us have been in your situation at one point where alcohol was ruining our lives. The good news is that you can quit if you want to, anyone can. And being sober is good - in every sense.
Sober Today
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 779
First, welcome to SR. 
Second, so stop drinking. If you can't, then you have a problem (doesn't matter if an alcoholic or just a drinking problem).
Third, this site is great support to help stop drinking. You are how I was when I was 21 and it's progressive. Best to get a handle on it now then wait until you become a daily drinker like me. Good luck and keep posting.
Second, so stop drinking. If you can't, then you have a problem (doesn't matter if an alcoholic or just a drinking problem).
Third, this site is great support to help stop drinking. You are how I was when I was 21 and it's progressive. Best to get a handle on it now then wait until you become a daily drinker like me. Good luck and keep posting.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI 
It sounds to me like drinking is causing a lot of problems for you, whether or not you consider yourself and alcoholic. Would you agree? If so, are your intentions to find a way to quit? Just about all of us have been in your situation at one point where alcohol was ruining our lives. The good news is that you can quit if you want to, anyone can. And being sober is good - in every sense.
I'm not seeking pity, as I know others have it far, far worse them me.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Manchester
Posts: 21
Just look at my thread, its pretty similar 'Problem?' i dont drink every day but when i do its to escape anxiety and depression and i drink a hell of a lot. people have started to notice and im not even sure im ready to stop because im scared of how else i will cope 
Everyone here has been really supportive with me and im sure you will get some good advice.
Everyone here has been really supportive with me and im sure you will get some good advice.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by Nonsensical
I'm with Scott - if drinking is a problem, then stop doing it.
Have you tried to stop?
Have you tried to stop?
Problem is too, I can drink very high volumes at the time. I'm only averaged size, but can put away more than 7-foot hulks - but my body and more importantly my mind can't deal with the after effects anymore.
It's like my tolerance goes up in the heat of the moment, then down in the aftermath.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
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Originally Posted by LeeD82
It's causing creeping problems. My parents have both had, or have, problems with alcohol, and I have justified my epic binges on the principles of containment (one day a week), but this one day now blights half my life.
I'm not seeking pity, as I know others have it far, far worse them me.
I'm not seeking pity, as I know others have it far, far worse them me.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by JDSalinger
Just look at my thread, its pretty similar 'Problem?' i dont drink every day but when i do its to escape anxiety and depression and i drink a hell of a lot. people have started to notice and im not even sure im ready to stop because im scared of how else i will cope
Everyone here has been really supportive with me and im sure you will get some good advice.
Everyone here has been really supportive with me and im sure you will get some good advice.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI
What do you seek then? SR is a great place to find out how to quit and support along the way if that is your intention.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
I turned 31yrs old in January, up until then for the previous 5 years I was hitting alcohol hard, I started off with only weekend drinking up until age 26, that then progressed to weeknight drinking, I always made it to work, never missed a day, but something was spiralling out of control and a change needed to be made.
My point is, if your concerned about your drinking, then maybe something does need to change, the hangovers get worse, the volumes consumed increase, something in the end has to give.
Early 30's is probably early enough before any real damage is done but old enough to begin to see/feel the effects of the wear and tear that years of drinking has done.
My point is, if your concerned about your drinking, then maybe something does need to change, the hangovers get worse, the volumes consumed increase, something in the end has to give.
Early 30's is probably early enough before any real damage is done but old enough to begin to see/feel the effects of the wear and tear that years of drinking has done.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
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Originally Posted by purpleknight
I turned 31yrs old in January, up until then for the previous 5 years I was hitting alcohol hard, I started off with only weekend drinking up until age 26, that then progressed to weeknight drinking, I always made it to work, never missed a day, but something was spiralling out of control and a change needed to be made.
My point is, if your concerned about your drinking, then maybe something does need to change, the hangovers get worse, the volumes consumed increase, something in the end has to give.
Early 30's is probably early enough before any real damage is done but old enough to begin to see/feel the effects of the wear and tear that years of drinking has done.
My point is, if your concerned about your drinking, then maybe something does need to change, the hangovers get worse, the volumes consumed increase, something in the end has to give.
Early 30's is probably early enough before any real damage is done but old enough to begin to see/feel the effects of the wear and tear that years of drinking has done.
And the paradox of requiring more volume whilst that increase in volume makes it even worst is starting to hit me hard.
It's not just the days I drink, it's the psychology that only the drinking days are the ones I look forward to. I need to kill this stone dead.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
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Yeap, the body won't be 20yrs old forever and as it ages pouring ever increasing amounts of alcohol into it has worse results each time.
Well in the end I found that I couldn't moderate, as in have just 1 or 2 drinks on a night out or a night in, it would just spiral into a binge and I'd drink until I blacked out, which was following my normal routine, as you say it's a paradox, but addiction can square any circle it needs to, in order to get what it wants.
So the answer for me was going Sober, I'm only Sober since Nov, and in that time I don't now have all that looking forward to the next drink, dealing with 2 day hangovers etc etc.
At the end of the day, something has to give, either it's alcohol, or the human body has it's limits!!
Well in the end I found that I couldn't moderate, as in have just 1 or 2 drinks on a night out or a night in, it would just spiral into a binge and I'd drink until I blacked out, which was following my normal routine, as you say it's a paradox, but addiction can square any circle it needs to, in order to get what it wants.
So the answer for me was going Sober, I'm only Sober since Nov, and in that time I don't now have all that looking forward to the next drink, dealing with 2 day hangovers etc etc.
At the end of the day, something has to give, either it's alcohol, or the human body has it's limits!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by purpleknight
Yeap, the body won't be 20yrs old forever and as it ages pouring ever increasing amounts of alcohol into it has worse results each time.
Well in the end I found that I couldn't moderate, as in have just 1 or 2 drinks on a night out or a night in, it would just spiral into a binge and I'd drink until I blacked out, which was following my normal routine, as you say it's a paradox, but addiction can square any circle it needs to, in order to get what it wants.
So the answer for me was going Sober, I'm only Sober since Nov, and in that time I don't now have all that looking forward to the next drink, dealing with 2 day hangovers etc etc.
At the end of the day, something has to give, either it's alcohol, or the human body has it's limits!!
Well in the end I found that I couldn't moderate, as in have just 1 or 2 drinks on a night out or a night in, it would just spiral into a binge and I'd drink until I blacked out, which was following my normal routine, as you say it's a paradox, but addiction can square any circle it needs to, in order to get what it wants.
So the answer for me was going Sober, I'm only Sober since Nov, and in that time I don't now have all that looking forward to the next drink, dealing with 2 day hangovers etc etc.
At the end of the day, something has to give, either it's alcohol, or the human body has it's limits!!
Yeah, I've always been the kind of guy who can't possibly do just 1 or 2 drinks.
Truth be told, just 1 or 2 drinks makes me feel like crap. Once I start, I need more to feel good. Until I hit the bottom of a dozen pint glasses.
I am functional in the rest of my life. But I'm finding it increasingly difficult to keep the act up.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
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Originally Posted by LeeD82
An escape from the thought process that says I need a drink.
Best of Luck!
SeaScape
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: California
Posts: 313
Hi and welcome!
I will never forget the first time I realized that I was looking forward to drinking more than anything else that day. I heard a little voice in my mind that said "excuse me...you know this isn't normal right. Most people aren't looking forward to getting drunk alone as the highlight of their day...and you used to be like that". For me... I knew I had a real problem then. Oh and also waking up and panicking at 3am about...life. Everything.
This lifestyle was no bueno for me and totally unsustainable. I encourage you to listen to your body! Drinking is progressive...the issues only get worse exponentially!
I will never forget the first time I realized that I was looking forward to drinking more than anything else that day. I heard a little voice in my mind that said "excuse me...you know this isn't normal right. Most people aren't looking forward to getting drunk alone as the highlight of their day...and you used to be like that". For me... I knew I had a real problem then. Oh and also waking up and panicking at 3am about...life. Everything.
This lifestyle was no bueno for me and totally unsustainable. I encourage you to listen to your body! Drinking is progressive...the issues only get worse exponentially!
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Originally Posted by LeeD82
An escape from the thought process that says I need a drink.
The very first step you need to take however is admiiting/realizing that alcohol is a problem. Some do this by going to an AA meeting and vocally announcing that they are an alcholic. Some take an entirely different route. But the bottom line is realizing that you cannot take that first drink. It doesn't really matter how often or how much you drink either, sobriety is an all or nothing proposition. Do you think you are prepared to take that step?
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
I recall posting a thread here regarding asking why the hangovers get different.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...different.html
There is a subtle and fine line that is crossed. Typically without our knowing, and certainly without our permission. Some days were far worse than others, but for the most part, my episodes of drinking (aka "binging") would now cause me days (like 4 or 5) worth of utter misery and woe.
And I wasn't even consuming more alcohol than when I only got hangovers.
So try I did. To figure out the EXACT formulation as to how this wouldnt occur anymore.
I tried only red, only white, only beer, only gin, gin and white, red on the weekends, gin only on Mondays followed by 3 nights of wine. I'm not even kidding.
And then, after years and years of more experiments and more hangovers and more withdrawals, I finally FINALLY found the perfect concoction.
Abstinence.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...different.html
There is a subtle and fine line that is crossed. Typically without our knowing, and certainly without our permission. Some days were far worse than others, but for the most part, my episodes of drinking (aka "binging") would now cause me days (like 4 or 5) worth of utter misery and woe.
And I wasn't even consuming more alcohol than when I only got hangovers.
So try I did. To figure out the EXACT formulation as to how this wouldnt occur anymore.
I tried only red, only white, only beer, only gin, gin and white, red on the weekends, gin only on Mondays followed by 3 nights of wine. I'm not even kidding.
And then, after years and years of more experiments and more hangovers and more withdrawals, I finally FINALLY found the perfect concoction.
Abstinence.
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