im back
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 91
im back
Hello, I was here probably two years ago..I managed to get sober for about three months and the blew it on the forth of July. Since then I have been a mess and things really can get worse. I am at the point now where although I know I need to quit I really just want to. My family life is a mess, my business is a joke. I am a joke. I am reaching out here because I don't even think I could sit through an as meeting at this point. I have become afraid of everything. Just don't want to drink anymore.
I'm glad you're giving it another go. 
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,367
welcome back 
sounds like you need a plan badatbooze. Posting here is good, but maybe you need to look at other things too - if you're not doing well and you think even a meeting is beyond you, seeing your Dr would probably be a good start?
D
sounds like you need a plan badatbooze. Posting here is good, but maybe you need to look at other things too - if you're not doing well and you think even a meeting is beyond you, seeing your Dr would probably be a good start?
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 91
Thanks you guys. I know I can do this. A couple years back I when I found this site I was a complete basket case. Crying all the time and whatnot. Now I'm just more or less mad at myself. The abuse we put ourselves and others through is crazy. The last year or so has been bad. Lots of falls. I am going to hurt when I'm older. Wait I'm in my forties and I hurt already. My elbows are shattered I think. Who knows what's going on inside. Maybe I should see a doctor. Anyways I'm glad for this place. It's sadly comforting to know there are others like me. All bad alcoholics but mostly all loving caring people. I just need to keep this attitude and I can do it. That is what I am praying for
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 183
Welcome badatbooze. I did almost the same thing, but 4 yrs. ago. Quit for 4 months, then started again "innocently enough" - and here I am almost 4 years later. I wish SO MUCH that I would've stayed quit so that I could say today that I have nearly 4 yrs. sober. BUT - I can say that I have almost a month and a half sober, and it's feeling really good. My self-hatred eased up considerably once I stopped.
You can do this! Keep posting!
You can do this! Keep posting!
Good to have you back on board 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
I am tired of waking up in the mornings with cuts and bruises all over myself. I had so many cuts on my face, I looked like I was in a car accident. Had no idea what happened. Burned my self real bad cooking, and ended up in the ER, so I know what you are talking about the falls. It's great you had 30 days. That's not easy. I wonder if the fear your talking about is really anxiety. Drinking will definitely make that happen. Sounds if you keep drinking, the rest of your life will go down the tubes, so you have a lot of reasons to quit drinking. Good Luck
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 91
Thanks again. All I have to do is look at my battered body in the mirror. That should do it. What I am trying to do is get a full belly of food every chance I can. It helps with my cravings. I haven't had heartburn or the runs in a couple days...hey things are already looking up! Ha!
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