Back after a long time
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: East coast
Posts: 54
Back after a long time
Hello all. It's been a long time since I posted anything on the forums. I was drinking again off and on for the last year. I haven't reached the point of physical dependence like when I was in my twenties, but my "problem drinking" has always been bothersome to myself and others close to me.
I started seeing someone about 5 weeks ago. She is a person that I have liked for years, and I'm finally dating her and its fantastic. I bought a car in November of last year, first car I've had in 6 years. Things have gone well for me and I really know its time to just let the old habit die. But as you all know, its easier said then done.
I'm reading the forums again and starting to post because I feel I need to be proactive in my approach to quitting for good. I know my problem has not been as severe as some other members here, but at one point in my life it was. And I still feel some mental addiction to alcohol, its just situational now instead of all the time.
I started seeing someone about 5 weeks ago. She is a person that I have liked for years, and I'm finally dating her and its fantastic. I bought a car in November of last year, first car I've had in 6 years. Things have gone well for me and I really know its time to just let the old habit die. But as you all know, its easier said then done.
I'm reading the forums again and starting to post because I feel I need to be proactive in my approach to quitting for good. I know my problem has not been as severe as some other members here, but at one point in my life it was. And I still feel some mental addiction to alcohol, its just situational now instead of all the time.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome back Blowfish, that's great that you are approaching this proactively. Because you know it will eventually get back to where it was, and most likely worse if you were to let it go.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: East coast
Posts: 54
Thanks a lot for the responses. I agree Scott. I'm in a pretty good place in my life now and it just feels natural to let the old baggage go. I'm hoping it will be easier this time to leave it behind fully, and continue moving forward with my life. I've also been a big time nicotine abuser too and smoking/drinking have always gone hand in hand for me. Anytime I'm not drinking, its been smokeless tobacco(snuff). I'm using nicotine lozenges now, and its helping, but I've wanted all day to go buy a can of snuff.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by Blowfish 
Thanks a lot for the responses. I agree Scott. I'm in a pretty good place in my life now and it just feels natural to let the old baggage go. I'm hoping it will be easier this time to leave it behind fully, and continue moving forward with my life. I've also been a big time nicotine abuser too and smoking/drinking have always gone hand in hand for me. Anytime I'm not drinking, its been smokeless tobacco(snuff). I'm using nicotine lozenges now, and its helping, but I've wanted all day to go buy a can of snuff.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Great White North
Posts: 195
Originally Posted by Pedro1234
Welcome back. Scott is right. If you had an issue before with drinking and you continue to drink now you will end up back where you were. Make a plan now while its not too difficult for yourself.
Not all alcoholics are the same. They may all have problems with alcohol, but to varying degrees.
I'm not saying he should continue to drink, all I am saying that its unfair to say that he will end up exactly like he was in his twenties if he continues to do so.
My father got drunk alot in his twenties and even his thirties, he is 60 now and he drinks moderately because he doesn't feel good if he drinks too much.
Just 2-3 glasses of red wine.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Welcome back Blowfish - I know you'll find the same support here you found last time 
Sorensen do you think you might grow out of it?
while many people may grow out of destructive drinking, I don't believe alcoholics do.
People don't end up here at SR because they have no problem.
It's a big step to join a community like this.
I think it's important we offer them good advice.
D
Sorensen do you think you might grow out of it?
while many people may grow out of destructive drinking, I don't believe alcoholics do.
People don't end up here at SR because they have no problem.
It's a big step to join a community like this.
I think it's important we offer them good advice.
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Great White North
Posts: 195
I might grow out of it, might not, however I wasn't speaking for myself.
What defines an alcoholic?
Someone who drinks too much?
Someone who is dependant on alcohol?
Someone that hurts loved ones when they drink?
Someone who gets DUI's and jail time because of their drinking?
While these are all STRONG characteristics of a prototypical alcoholic, only WE can define ourselves as alcoholics.
While I admit to myself that I am an alcoholic, I do not believe that I will never have control over it because I do not believe it is a disease but rather a psychological and behavioural issue that develops over time and becomes habitual.
I'm sorry but there is no scientific data whatsoever to prove that alcoholism is a disease, just people that say it is and it unfortunately became mainstream.
Some critics of the disease model argue alcoholism is a choice, not a disease, and stripping alcohol abusers of their choice, by applying the disease concept, is a threat to the health of the individual; the disease concept gives the substance abuser an excuse. A disease cannot be cured by force of will; therefore, adding the medical label transfers the responsibility from the abuser to caregivers. Inevitably the abusers become unwilling victims, and just as inevitably they take on that role. They argue that the disease theory of alcoholism exists only to benefit the professionals' and governmental agencies responsible for providing recovery services, and the disease model has not offered a solution for those attempting to stop abusive alcohol and drug use.[41]
These critics hold that by removing some of the stigma and personal responsibility the disease concept actually increases alcoholism and drug abuse and thus the need for treatment.[41] This is somewhat supported by a study which found that a greater belief in the disease theory of alcoholism and higher commitment to total abstinence to be factors correlated with increased likelihood that an alcoholic would have a full-blown relapse (substantial continued use) following an initial lapse (single use).[42] However, the authors noted that "the direction of causality cannot be determined from these data. It is possible that belief in alcoholism as a loss-of-control disease predisposes clients to relapse, or that repeated relapses reinforce clients' beliefs in the disease model."
Another study found that only 25 percent of physicians believed that alcoholism is a disease. The majority believed alcoholism to be a social or psychological problem instead of a disease. (S.I. Mignon. Physicians' Perceptions of Alcoholics: The Disease Concept Reconsidered. Alcoholism Treatment Quarterly, 1996, v. 14, no. 4, pp. 33–45)
What defines an alcoholic?
Someone who drinks too much?
Someone who is dependant on alcohol?
Someone that hurts loved ones when they drink?
Someone who gets DUI's and jail time because of their drinking?
While these are all STRONG characteristics of a prototypical alcoholic, only WE can define ourselves as alcoholics.
While I admit to myself that I am an alcoholic, I do not believe that I will never have control over it because I do not believe it is a disease but rather a psychological and behavioural issue that develops over time and becomes habitual.
I'm sorry but there is no scientific data whatsoever to prove that alcoholism is a disease, just people that say it is and it unfortunately became mainstream.
Some critics of the disease model argue alcoholism is a choice, not a disease, and stripping alcohol abusers of their choice, by applying the disease concept, is a threat to the health of the individual; the disease concept gives the substance abuser an excuse. A disease cannot be cured by force of will; therefore, adding the medical label transfers the responsibility from the abuser to caregivers. Inevitably the abusers become unwilling victims, and just as inevitably they take on that role. They argue that the disease theory of alcoholism exists only to benefit the professionals' and governmental agencies responsible for providing recovery services, and the disease model has not offered a solution for those attempting to stop abusive alcohol and drug use.[41]
These critics hold that by removing some of the stigma and personal responsibility the disease concept actually increases alcoholism and drug abuse and thus the need for treatment.[41] This is somewhat supported by a study which found that a greater belief in the disease theory of alcoholism and higher commitment to total abstinence to be factors correlated with increased likelihood that an alcoholic would have a full-blown relapse (substantial continued use) following an initial lapse (single use).[42] However, the authors noted that "the direction of causality cannot be determined from these data. It is possible that belief in alcoholism as a loss-of-control disease predisposes clients to relapse, or that repeated relapses reinforce clients' beliefs in the disease model."
Another study found that only 25 percent of physicians believed that alcoholism is a disease. The majority believed alcoholism to be a social or psychological problem instead of a disease. (S.I. Mignon. Physicians' Perceptions of Alcoholics: The Disease Concept Reconsidered. Alcoholism Treatment Quarterly, 1996, v. 14, no. 4, pp. 33–45)
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,554
I remember you Blowfish - I'm so glad you made your way back to us.
It's good that you're acknowledging it's time to 'let the old habit die'. That's an excellent reason for being here and reaching out for some support.
It's good that you're acknowledging it's time to 'let the old habit die'. That's an excellent reason for being here and reaching out for some support.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: East coast
Posts: 54
Thanks again for all the replies. I remember you too, Hevyn. And of course, Dee!
You guys are the best and it feels nice to be around here again. And on the topic of labels, and alcoholism as a disease: I'm not really concerned with that. I think sometimes people should just do what they feel is best for themselves. It is true that I'm in way better shape than before, but it doesn't change the way I feel about it. I don't want to lean on chemicals to get me through stressful times or emotional issues, and that has always been what I do. I think that is unhealthy both mentally and physically, and I don't want to put myself or my new loved one through any of that. Things are going great for the first time in my adult life and I just need to accept it. Makes me think of an old Nirvana lyric, "I miss the comfort in being sad". Only I don't feel that way anymore, and I'm ready to enjoy the fruits of my labor. I've worked hard to get where I'm at now and I don't want to destroy it by slipping out of control. Maybe I won't get worse, but I don't really want to risk it.
You guys are the best and it feels nice to be around here again. And on the topic of labels, and alcoholism as a disease: I'm not really concerned with that. I think sometimes people should just do what they feel is best for themselves. It is true that I'm in way better shape than before, but it doesn't change the way I feel about it. I don't want to lean on chemicals to get me through stressful times or emotional issues, and that has always been what I do. I think that is unhealthy both mentally and physically, and I don't want to put myself or my new loved one through any of that. Things are going great for the first time in my adult life and I just need to accept it. Makes me think of an old Nirvana lyric, "I miss the comfort in being sad". Only I don't feel that way anymore, and I'm ready to enjoy the fruits of my labor. I've worked hard to get where I'm at now and I don't want to destroy it by slipping out of control. Maybe I won't get worse, but I don't really want to risk it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 508
It's good to be aware and self-aware & I think if you can handle the situational thing and your mental attitude has changed enough then you are the only one in control of your future and whether the relationship you have with alcohol now is sustainable, maybe, as someone else said, you may have 'grown out of' the habit. Only you know if you're fooling yourself.
Sounds like you've come a long way in your life and congratulations on your happiness... Long may it continue
Sounds like you've come a long way in your life and congratulations on your happiness... Long may it continue
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I've worked hard to get where I'm at now and I don't want to destroy it by slipping out of control.
If I have a life I love, I have no need of escape...
D
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