Emptiness
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,405
Emptiness
Emptiness
Trying to Fill the Hole Inside
~By Buddy T
For me, emptiness was that loneliness that came with living with and trying to love someone who was just not "there." Someone who didn't care about me or anything else but booze.
Well, I tried to fill that void with a lot of things and most of them turned out to be less than healthy choices, because I didn't have a clue as how to look after me. I never had any experience with it at all. All I had were examples from people who didn't have a clue either. This ended up being another big disappointment and just left a bigger hole inside.
Replacing Old Patterns of Thinking
Then I heard folks in Al-Anon talk about keeping the focus on ourselves and that it was okay to do that. Wow! But I also heard someone in the rooms say that before recovery could occur; those old behaviors and patterns of thinking had to be replaced with their spiritual opposites!
I'm not sure that I still understand what all of this means, but with the help of this program, I do know that some of my thinking has changed and some of the self-pity has changed to gratitude, some of the depression has turned to hope, and some of the pain has turned to joy. So, I guess is does work one day at a time.
Trying to Fill the Hole Inside
~By Buddy T
For me, emptiness was that loneliness that came with living with and trying to love someone who was just not "there." Someone who didn't care about me or anything else but booze.
Well, I tried to fill that void with a lot of things and most of them turned out to be less than healthy choices, because I didn't have a clue as how to look after me. I never had any experience with it at all. All I had were examples from people who didn't have a clue either. This ended up being another big disappointment and just left a bigger hole inside.
Replacing Old Patterns of Thinking
Then I heard folks in Al-Anon talk about keeping the focus on ourselves and that it was okay to do that. Wow! But I also heard someone in the rooms say that before recovery could occur; those old behaviors and patterns of thinking had to be replaced with their spiritual opposites!
I'm not sure that I still understand what all of this means, but with the help of this program, I do know that some of my thinking has changed and some of the self-pity has changed to gratitude, some of the depression has turned to hope, and some of the pain has turned to joy. So, I guess is does work one day at a time.
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