jzeb2008

So, come to find out, my husband is our(not so small town's)biggest known drug addict. I've recently ran into an old friend of my husband's of over 25 years and he won't be involved with him anymore. Or, at this point, really anyone. Not even some of the beggars and homeless. It's crazy. I knew he was bad, but that bad.

lizwig

I'm sorry....that must have been very difficult to hear. Try to keep in mind it's one person's perspective and you can choose to do with it what you want. Big hug to you...

Kindeyes

I remember the pain and embarrassment when my daughter went to a class reunion and she ran into some of her brother's old friends. All they wanted to ask her about is how bad his drug problem was......and it hurt her deeply. She cried. It broke my heart.

I'm sorry if this persons words hurt you......

gentle hugs
ke

hopeful4

I am sorry. Hugs.

dane5679

Remember this is no reflection of you or WHO you are! I remember being at a school fundraising event right after putting my AH in rehab. I actually had a few rude ppl approach me in front of the other mothers in PTA and start talking about my AH. I was furious. Then I reminded myself that the things he does do not define me or my children. I know it hurts. It is def an eye opener. HUGS.

zoso77

Imagine if you had to live with him.

ZoSo

jzeb2008

Zoso, that is the saddest part. I did live with him. For 8 years. Devoted my life to him. And, he wasn't that way when I met him. Right now he's with the enabling mother only to steal her pills and when she's had it enough, he'll be living on the streets.

needingabreak

Very sad. So sorry you are having to deal with the repercussions but like others have said this does not define you or have any reflection on you. I don't know why it shocks me that people are so rude and nosey. Too bad people cannot mind their own business! Hugs.

zoso77

Yes. You did live with him.

Yes. You saw him slowly disintegrate right before your eyes.

Yes. He's on a path where he could very well end up homeless.

And all of it is sad. I know you're in a lot of pain, and there is really nothing I can do to assuage that.

BUT...

The important thing right now is to accept where you are and where he is. Because where he is is out of your hands.

This doesn't mean you'll feel any less miserable, or any less angry. You're going to feel all those things, and that's normal given everything that's happened. What it does mean is that even though you may not feel like it, your life has to go on. A moment at a time. It's either that or surrender to all those negative emotions. And as someone who's been there too many times to count, I don't want that for you.

ZoSo

jzeb2008

Thanks, Zoso! I know that I need to go on. I'm now beginning to see that the guy that this came from is slowly trying to move in on me. But, the brutal part is, what he is saying is absolutely true at this point and is something that I have been saying for some time to my husband when the wrath in me seems to come on. It is the one thing that he brings up every time that we speak. I think that he knows it himself. Maybe not.

dane5679

Please be careful of anyone who is using a weak spot in your heart to "move in" on you. Anyone who is worth your time will want to build you up, not make you sad and tear you down. Hugs!

jzeb2008

Oh, I am way too careful to now get with anyone right now. I am still married anyways.