2bhappier

I finally asked someone I've truly admired to be my AA sponsor and she said no. She doesn't have enough time. I know this is absurd but I was really taken aback someone said no! I guess I shouldn't assume everyone can do everything and I appreciate that she is super busy. She told me to keep my eyes open at the meetings and look for someone who raises their hand when they ask for people who can be sponsors or temporary sponsors.

I found another meeting to go to that is a bit of a long drive but I am going to go today to that one.

BadCompany

Yeah, that is a problem. When people work the AA program they suddeny get a life. Keep looking, something will work itself out.

Nonsensical

At least she was honest. She could have said yes and then now been a very good sponsor. She did the right thing.

least

You'll find your sponsor. Be patient.

sugarbear1

I'm sorry she didn't have anyone in mind to help you out as she was so busy. Doesn't she have a sponsee who is available?

On second thought, try someone else!

2bhappier

I am hopeful that by going to this meeting later today, the out of the way one, I'll meet more potential sponsors. It is a challenge because I live in such a remote area and there just are not many people that I see in meetings. An on line sponsor was suggested to me but I am not sure how that would work out. Does anyone have any experience with that?

keithj

There have been times when I've been working with a number of new guys that I've had to explain to a potential sponsee that they would be better served by someone else. If the new guy is extremely motivated and can get the work done without a lot of hand holding, it can still work, but usually I introduce them to someone else that can do an equally good job, and also has the time to make that personal investment. It's not that the sponsor doesn't want to help or doesn't have time to help. It's a recognition that another person could do a better job of helping at this time.

Threshold

Both my official sponsors were long distance, online and phone. I also live in a remote area. We do what we have to do.

I don't encourage people to NOT have a face to face sponsor, but working on the steps with someone who can lead you is THE program. I wouldn't put it off because of lack of local sponsors.

I did find a couple things about it I think were a real plus. We didn't live in the same area and know all the same people. That eliminated any competition, anonymity issues, or having any area drama interfere with our step work.

I didn't know their people, they didn't know mine. We didn't spend time or energy talking about anyone. I didn't have to worry about telling them anything or doing my step 5 with them...it was never going to get out to anyone I knew. I didn't have people nitter nattering to me with gossip about my sponsor.

No one could tell me they heard this or that about them, or that one of their former sponsees had had such and such an experience with them...nothing around to cast aspersions on the sponsor/sponsee relationship.

All we had in common was the program, and our willingness to help one another.

I met one of them here on SR, and another at a convention.